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Stargazer899

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    2
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About Stargazer899

  • Rank
    Just Getting Started
  • Birthday 06/24/1989

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Couple
  • Location
    NC
  • Anniversary
    xx/xx/xxxx

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  1. Last night, we had a couple come over who was more experienced to come talk to us about the lifestyle, with no pressure to do anything. I think we initially gave them too much credit, thinking that they would be really good with newbies, not being pushy, making everyone feel comfortable. When they first arrived, they were not at all what I expected, personality wise (we already saw their picture). I wasn't really attracted to either of them and kind of wanted to call it a night. We had some drinks, and my husband basically kept the conversation going. The only thing the woman said was, "Mhm." At one point, the man said his gf should give me a massage, which was fine with me, but I didn't want them to get the wrong idea. My husband was constantly checking in with me, making sure I was okay. At one point, we were both making out with our own partners and then moved onto blowjobs. The two of them started crowding around me and touching my breasts, which I was fine with, but again didn't want to give them the wrong idea. At one point, the man steers me towards him, and even though I wasn't really feeling it, I went along with it. Part of the reason was because I knew mg husband really wanted to try swinging, and I didn't want to be the buzzkill for everybody there. But being with this man didn't turn me on at all. Things escalated so quickly that I didn't even have time to decide if I felt comfortable or not, and I certainly didn't feel comfortable pulling my husband aside at that point. After we swapped partners, both pairs did oral. I didn't feel jealous watching my husband with another woman, but I also didn't feel turned on. At no point did the man ask me if I was okay with it. At one point, he tried to sit me on his penis to have sex with me, with no condom in sight, which was incredibly disrespectful. We didn't do anything more than soft swap, even though they were hinting at it, and my husband was on board. I had no desire to have sex with the man and didn't particularly want my husband to full swap either. As things were winding down, the other couple started getting dressed rather abruptly, before my husband had a chance to finish. We talked things out afterward and my husband said he was really surprised we did as much as we did. I told him that I really wasn't attracted to either of them and didn't really get much out of it, but definitely stepped out of my comfort zone. I did not like how pushy the man was being, how he didn't ask if I was okay at all, and how it didn't really seem okay to him if nothing had happened. It seemed like he came with an agenda. I also really didn't want any cumming in the mouth or face, which my husband knew, but the couple didn't bc we didn't talk about boundaries. At one point, the woman was going down on me, and the man tried to come on my face. I turned and it ended up on my collarbone, but that was not what I wanted at all. That night, every time I woke up, I couldn't fall back asleep. I felt really alone, even though my husband was being extremely loving. Towards the morning, I started crying uncontrollably, mostly due to the fact that I realized I didn't want to be with another man and I didn't really want my husband to be with another woman, even though he seemed to enjoy himself. I wanted our intimacy back, not shared with anyone else. He said that it was totally okay if we never did it again. I hate that he found this thing that he enjoyed, just to have it taken away. I keep replaying all the things that my husband was doing with the other woman. It didn't bother me at the time but now, it kind of makes me sick to my stomach. How much of my feelings are due to this incompatible couple and how much is it due to the fact that I'm not cut out for the lifestyle? I really don't want to try it with another couple just to feel this way again.
  2. My husband and I have a pretty good sex life and do it multiple times a week. We've talked a lot about swinging and plan on dipping our toes in soon. I know that feelings of jealousy are possible, and we are planning on taking things very slow. In our sex life, I give him a BJ almost every time we have sex, as foreplay and also to avoid the need for lube. He goes down on me maybe once a month. I'm not sure if this is common for couples but it was the same thing with my 2 exes as well. It has made me a little insecure about my lady parts. He says that he doesn't mind doing it, as long as it's clean, and I told him I have no issues with cleaning off right before, if that's what he wants. But so far, the frequency hasn't really increased. I'm worried that in a swinging situation, I will see him go down on another woman more eagerly and frequently and feel like there's something wrong with me. Has anyone experienced this before or has any insight?
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