CassieNineTales

Back in November, my husband and I decided to welcome a friend of mine into our relationship (poly) after talking about it for over a year. I was under the impression we had zero issues in our marriage. If I had the slightest feeling that we did, I never would have welcomed her in. Anyway, fast forward to now. He asked me for a divorce because he "only loves me as a friend" and they are together. I'm working through those issues and I'm getting some closure. My question for you guys is, I still like the idea of a poly relationship, but I would like to be the addition into the relationship because I know what it is like to be hurt in these situations now and I know I wouldn't do that. Is this a good idea? (Maybe not right now, but eventually.)

I am going to agree with you, I think it is a very personal thing. It's so sad that it's viewed so negatively. =/

This is a personal question so I dont know how many responses I'll get to it. Who knows about your lifestyle? Parents? Friends? No one? Are you hush-hush about it or do you not care who knows?

My hubby and I are totally new to this! We're still in a "learning" phase I guess you could call it. We are trying to figure out what we both want and what our limits are. Its been very exciting and has actually brought us way closer and we havent even really done anything yet. We have talked about threesomes and both really like the idea of bringing another girl into the bedroom. Also, we're talking about maybe joining with another couple (or more than one couple, if that is the case) for group sex. I love this thread btw. It nice reading what others want in and future and what they have already experienced.

Ok. I know this is a taboo topic to some people, but I'm curious what you guys and ladies think. I've been on social media reading a lot about squirting. It seems like so many people (male and female) are weirded out by it, grossed out or say it is piss. Some people even say it is unnatural. This makes me incredibly insecure as I am a squirter and, I can tell you, it is a totally involuntary response by my body when I am extremely comfortable and being fucked right. Anyone here have opinions or insight as to what it is? Also, what are your thoughts? Turn on or turn off?

Thats awesome =) seems like you guys have a great relationship! My hubby and I are very new to this but it already has made us so much more open with each other, even though its only gotten as far as talking about it lol. Its great knowing we can both be totally open with each other and not be judged. Update us along the way and let us know how it goes! =)

I dont think it sounds like a set up. I would like seeing my hubby with anotber woman. (I am Bi though) I think it'd be like live porn but with the man I love and a gorgeous woman. Its a turn on. Just make sure she knows how important your marriage is to her and make sure she feels MORE important to you afterwords, not less. =) Just curious- have you asked her if she wants YOU to watch HER with another guy? Maybe that would help her feel more like its a "leveled playing field" if that makes sense? Maybe, if its within both your comfort zones, you guys could try being with another couple and see how that goes? (Her with the guy and you with the woman) Just suggestions =)

It is very exciting! I love knowing that my hubby is open and accepting of my desires. We will definitely keep the line of communication open. =) thank you! Cassie

Thank you all so much for your honest answers! I hope one day I will have your guys confidence and poise. I dont even know the first step we would take in getting into the lifestyle. But I feel like it will be fun getting to learn about it all with my Hubby (and maybe one day... another couple) lol

My hubby and I are in Minnesota and are also in our mid 20s too! Thank god there are some other people in here from MN! I was beginning to feel a little lonely hahaha! (If you dont mind he piggybacking off of your post- please delete if you'd like) what are good Swingers clubs in Minnesota and where are they located at?

This might sound odd, but I'm hoping someone out there can relate and give me some guidance. A little bit about our situation: my hubby and I have been together since we were 16. We got married at 19 and are now 25 years old. We have a great relationship and he is a great man. I am bisexual and he has always known that but because we got together so young I never really explored that side of myself (not because my husband wasn't ok with it - he's incredibly supportive - but because I get so nervous around women lol) but I've known I liked women since before I knew I liked men. My husband and I both attach a lot of "feelings" with sex, I guess you could say, neither of us can really get "in the mood", if you will if we don't have some kind of feelings for the person. Stranger sex just doesn't appeal to us, personally. But we have talked at length about swinging and couples/group sex and think it would be really fun and adventurous. I guess that's where things get fuzzy for me I think, because I am so nervous with women, that it would be easier (and more fun) for us to be with a couple because I could relax a little knowing she's with someone she cares about and so am I so we will (hopefully) both be comfortable. As dumb as this question is - is there a such think as 2 couples being in a relationship with each other? Like, how does that work?! Lol I've heard of a married couple having a girlfriend or something like that but I feel like if it is another established couple that we got to know it would take some of the pressure off of me just being with a female (I hope that makes sense). Am I overthinking this? Has anyone ever had a relationship like this? Am I setting myself, and my marriage, up for a terrible situation? Sorry for all the dumb questions but thanks for listening! Cassie

Oh my god! I have so many questions for you guys and ladies! Im new to this and very curious how you got started in swinging and why? Did you start out with strangers or friends? What advice do you have for newcomers into the swing world? Sorry if I sound nosey. Just very curious. =)