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J&Kliketoplay

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About J&Kliketoplay

  • Rank
    Just Getting Started
  • Birthday 10/25/1976

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Couple
  • Location
    Nebraska
  • Anniversary
    xx/xx/xxxx

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  1. Is it just about the sex for everyone? My wife and I have been married 14 years. Early on we had some threesomes with a few women we knew. Then a few months ago we met a new woman and ended up in the sack something like 10 out of 14 straight days. It was awesome and it got us back to thinking about getting into the lifestyle. We thought for a long time about a guy who could join us. We settled and agreed on semi-friend. We talked to him about it one night and he was all in. We've now had a bunch of fabulous nights with him too. He is married though so his availability is very limited and the lady we met recently fell madly in love with some guy (good for her!). So we decided to step out and take out some profiles on swinger sites and look around for others. Preferably another couple but singles as well. Anyways, our first experience out there actively searching has been pretty bad. It's always been somewhat organic in the past with friendships or at least a mutual respect already established. This is the first time we've talked to others with it being upfront that we're swingers. We're currently getting flooded with tons of dick pics or pics of some guy's wife with a 10 gallon bucket of jizz on her face. As if this is all supposed to get us going? Is this how the "scene" is? To be honest, what we enjoy has been the more subtle parts. The dates out, flirting, intellectual conversations, the playing around of course but in a classy, candles, back massages and sexy lingerie way. Everyone else seems to want to tell us how heavy their load is or send pictures with proof their wife can double shoe horn a group of guys with the best of them... Yikes.. No judgement... Whatever you enjoy. I just assumed there were as many swingers out there looking for sensual nights out as us. We haven't been able to find them though and that's been quite frustrating. Any advice? Should we be looking somewhere we don't know about? Is this just how it is and we have to wade through it to find what we want? Thanks!
  2. Wow, you summed it up perfectly. I'm understanding exactly that. My wife, who is the "doc" in our relationship probably will always be the main attraction here and that's not such a bad thing. I love and respect women and will always treat them as such and perhaps, as you mention, having a woman who is the main "catch" will make me realize that the couple we are with feels the same way and thus the same appreciation should be shown from me. Thanks again!
  3. Hello everyone. I have a few questions and want to voice some of the nervousness I've been feeling now that we are starting to enter the swinging scene. About us, I'm 40 and she's 35. We've been married for 14 amazing years. We are parents, professionals, etc., etc. we've always been adventurous and early on in our marriage we had a couple threesomes with other women. They were great for both of us but then with kids and careers, etc., etc., we didn't do anything like that for a solid decade. However we talked about it A LOT and always talked about next time having a man or a couple join us. A few months ago my wife's coworker and us got drunk and ended up in the sack. It was amazing. She was great and we go together 5 or 6 times in a span of two weeks. However my wife pretty much said, you know, that's 3 women and 0 men. It was time for a man. I was nervous but agreed (not pressured as this has truly been a fantasy of mine too) and booked a trip to Vegas and found a gentleman on Craigslist and arranged to meet. I was so nervous. I wanted to do it but the thoughts and nerves were just crippling. Anyways, long story short, he showed up to our hotel, we had a drink in the room and while he was nice enough, something just wasn't right. I really wasn't feeling it. I couldn't explain it at the time but I just felt "off" about the whole thing. We went for it anyways as my thought was, it would get better once we started. NOPE. I felt like I was going to have an anxiety attack. 10 minutes into it and my wife realized it wasn't working for me and basically stopped everything. We apologized to the guy and he left. I felt terrible. Am I really so insecure and selfish that I could do this 3 times with another women and enjoy it but not let her have her fantasy fulfilled too? So we get back home and I told her I felt it needed to be someone I was more comfortable with. Someone I knew and liked. So we recently decided to ask a friend of ours to join us for some "soft fun". I basically explained that I wanted to give her an early birthday present and fulfill her fantasy of getting a full body massage from two men. We went out for drinks, came home and did just that. And more. He gave her oral, basically we did everything except penetration from him. We had agreed to take it slower and not go all the way beforehand and talk about it after. It was perfect! I was so comfortable in the situation and seeing her have so much fun was amazing. Now we are inviting him over this weekend again and we all plan to do "everything" this time. We are even planning on taking a vacation this winter to a swinging resort... We are in! Well, except, I still have some nerves. This is embarrassing to talk about but I hope perhaps someone can understand, help me sort through these nerves. My main fear is... My wife is ridiculously gorgeous. Way hotter than me. She's always been beautiful but got into bodybuilding a few years ago and now looks amazing. I'm nervous that the disparity in our attractiveness levels will lead to awkward situations where maybe some couple and us hookup but they are both way more excited about her than me. It end up feeling as sort of "well, you got to take him too if you want her" type situation. Any advice?
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