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wisconsin

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About wisconsin

  • Rank
    100 Posts Club
  • Birthday 03/28/1972

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  • Relationship Status
    female part of the couple
  • Location
    WI

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  1. From my experiences I can't handle stubble for too long. First kiss usually seals the deal about potential playdate. If our chemistry is compatible, if he is not scratching my face and lips and if it is interesting enough to have full blown session or just short version of it. I play rarely with new partners but if I was in the club and my playmate had stubble I would move on to the next one...Unless I know the man I have played with him before and I know he is gentle enough I would probably stay. If it's a new partner and he is has stubble and not careful enough I could kick him out of bed. If chemistry is right and with partner I trust I like sloppy sex with lots of mixed fluids saliva,cum,pussy juices, licking, and sucking and him getting his whole face in there. Stubble hurt and distract me. For my hubby I prefer him to be shaved, for my BF nicely trimmed beard is always my preferred choice.
  2. We have an open marriage and usually have long-term play mates. When I look for a potential BF I look for single man who is busy with his career and has his mind free from all family obligations and his wife needs. He values his time and wants meet on a regular basis to have good sex and wants to relieve stress of everyday life. He can host, has a nice house with ton of music and he lives close to me. He knows how to make a girl happy, he is reasonably cute and in a decent shape.Oh, and he needs to be able to play in a condom at least for a couple first times. Not many men can stay hard with condoms. I do have a lot of problems to find that perfect BF I want though. They are very rare species.
  3. I am not a man but I did had major plastic surgery which left me with big scar. It fades away after a while. and you can barely see it now... You can get mederma ointment in local pharmacy and apply it religiously for good 3 months it will keep moisture in and promote healing. Vit E is one of the good ones too. There are silicone sheets specifically designed for scars. Studies shows if they are properly used they reduce scars by up to 80%. After a year you will barely notice it. For now I would use a corset. You don't have to be naked during play. When we used to play in a clubs lots of women were wearing corsets. I remember I was very anxious first time when I had to play with my BF and I had that area covered. I didn't want to distract him with it. After a while when it started looking better I opened it up and he didn't pass out. You are saying you have regular playmates. I am sure they like you the way you are anyway. Just put something on and enjoy yourself. My BF broke his leg recently and has a big scar on his knee. I still like playing with him anyway I just have to work double because we are very limited in positions since he can't put weight on his leg but it's a totally different story.
  4. I hope it wasn't referenced about my comment when I said I don't care about getting HPV or herpes. :nono:I really do. I only played bareback with 2 partners for last 15 years hubby and BF. And so far didn't meet another man I wanted to risk my life or my husband's life for it playing bareback. I believe there is no way to protect yourself from getting these diseases when condoms are not effective. It's just like playing Russian roulette. According to statistics 60% people have either herpes I or II and not know about it. I am just being real about it. Lot's of people have sores on their lips and have herpes type I many people completely asymptomatic with type II. Women who had been treated for cervical dysplasia can and most likely carry form of HPV. Their partners can be carriers and they can't even get tested because there is no tests for men for HPV. It's just a hope that your body and immune system can kick it out if you played with such partner. Having said that having lupus or any type of autoimmune disease you need to be especially cautious choosing partners because your immune system is already been compromised. Swingers community is pretty small and exposing somebody on purpose is very wrong. There was a lot said here before about STD's here. They do exist and very real. Some of them in my humble opinion not so scary though. as we were told. Sometimes we do take risks, hopefully they are worth it.
  5. "Doctors knows how to fake a test". What does it mean? There is no way to fake a blood work test, unless you run your own lab, and what kind of person would do it, especially a doctor? This is just sick.:eek:and illegal BTW. And test is still not safe even if it was taken the same day. Antibodies needs time to build up to show in a test. Sometimes in takes up to 3 months to develop them to detect them in a test.It means you can get tested and be negative but still be infected and not know it for about for 3 months and you can still transmit it. Ask Chicup he is a microbiologist he will tell you. There are people with HIV and other diseases who are open about it and look for sex with people with the same problems. Making somebody purposely acquire a STD is way beyond wrong. Playing bareback is a serious decision and needs to be evaluated seriously. People do lie and it doesn't matter what kind of job they are doing, however being a medical professional gives you more knowledge about disease process and signs and symptoms to watch for.
  6. It's very hard to find chemistry compatible people in LS especially a couple. If you are interested in playing with the same people and you think they are fun for more then one encounter it's a great opportunity. There are only two things that bother me. I would not want get HIV or hepatitis (B or C). You would need to take a ton of pills with lot's of side effects for rest of your life with HIV and it's annoying. or your liver will fall apart and you will look jaundiced and unhappy with huge swollen belly with hepatitis. Sorry for gross details. Everything else is easy treatable (bacterial infections). There are diseases condoms won't protect you anyway (viral infections such as HPV or herpes) and almost any swinger has them and doesn't know about it or I think about 80% of swingers have them. I personally am not worried about them. Life is full of risks and this risk is acceptable for me. I am a nurse BTW. It is always a risk playing bareback but in my opinion majority of folks in LS play bareback. I usually assess people's lifestyle and risky behaviors and how much I enjoy playing with them. It's your decision.
  7. I could go condomless only if I can see it is worth it. I have only met several men I could see as a my regular dates partners and would play without condoms with them. I would always assess their lifestyle. If they meet many people how busy they are and if they would prefer regular partner versus hooking up with different people all the time. First time is always condoms for me and trial to assess for future. Usually playdates in hotels or clubs are fun fun but not worth risking my life or my husbands life for it. With a regular couple or single man if there is a good connection and lots of common values and chemistry it's very possible and probably the logical way to go.
  8. Kissing is a most important part of foreplay for me.It starts my engines going. I would consider myself "active tongue'' person. but usually can adapt to the style of my partner if I can. I go slow and passionate first and try to match to my playmate's style and rhythm then I would do little more and active and watch for response. By our kissing I usually decide if I am going to play or not. However, couples experiences are different then singles. When I play with single man I carefully choose my pray and may go around in circles flirting, mingling, kissing, dancing trying to pick the one I feel more chemistry with and won't settle for something less. When we play with couples I am more willing to adapt to everybody and kissing isn't the priority as long as he is more less attractive and can get it hard.
  9. Bbarnsworth nailed it. From my experience you never know until you try it. Looks, body type, even personality don't mean anything until I start playing. I usually give chemistry test first... Kissing. If my body accepts and doesn't reject him I would give it a try. I had couple experiences in a club we used to go. There was a security guy there who was playing on occasion. We did kiss couple of times but somehow I didn't invite him to play and turned to another men every time. If you all like each other why don't you try it.
  10. I have had copper IUDs for all my reproductive years when we didn't want have kids. They are great protection and I would recommend it to any of my friends.No problems ever... About rules 3 rules. 1.condoms always 2. I would prefer to know where my partner wants to cum before I get surprised 3. don't forget to enjoy it:D Don't like preplanned activities and everything depends on a partner. If we enjoy our partners and have good chemistry separate rooms, kissing, anal or whatever makes everybody happy. We usually prefer to know the rules of people we are going to play with. Usually and sorry to be blunt it's women who create drama and role their eyes and we avoid people with too many rules. We did have a situation where I had to say that I got a headache and we would need to go in a middle of a play. I just couldn't play with that man and my hubby did enjoy his wife a lot. We both said that we are sorry but we have to leave. They did contacted us later for another playdate so I don't think we upset them. Hubby never complained about it. Whenever I play with single men they never have too many rules maybe just condoms. They usually are up for anything as soon as I make a move or offer something. Never had a male partner who would decline kissing or anal.
  11. Don't want to make this post about me because I was simply replaying to poster question with my little story and our complicated situation which started with swinging and ended with polyamorous story. It's been challenging right from beginning but getting better . It took 2.5 years for all of us to accept who we are and for BF to admit that he has feelings for me. Hubby realized it too and he decided that my happiness is very important for him as long as I don't have any intentions to leave him and he gets his piece of pie too. I didn't like swinging( because it was unpredictable and almost half of the time men didn't meet my expectations). I was initiator of our relationships. BF was a man I wanted and I was on a mission to get him. He is very independent and there were a lot of thorns on my road. Now I basically spend most of my time with my family and meet with BF about twice a week and stay overnight on weekends. We travel together (3 of us) and we don't do MFM anymore, I sleep with them separately. So emotions are developed on everybody's part but instead of running away from them or making a drama we decided to work with it and enjoy love and friendship.
  12. I would recommend to check your and hubby's hormone levels, they affect your libido. If they subsided a bit and with age they do you may think about supplementing. Talk to your doc and have it checked. Cialis can help as well to make it more interesting. Our excitement threshold is different now and we need more stimulation. We need to be more kinkier and more creative. After participating in a couple of bi orgies our options with each other are little limited.
  13. 2.5 years ago we met and played with a man. It started as we were looking for a single man for threesome and it turned into us playing separately and ended in polyamory triangle. Now I have a full time BF of 2.5 years and a full time husband of 20 years and 3 kids. I almost live in two houses, each weekend is booked and planned months ahead of time and we all travel together. Very challenging and a lot of fun of course. Lots of emotions involved and we try deal with them on a regular basis like grown-ups.
  14. I accept certs very seriously I don't date take it from just anybody and usually certify only ones I really enjoyed playing with. There were lots of guys with excellent certs that were not worthy them so I don't always trust certs. M&G certs don't show me anything because it usually means people like socializing and it's not what I am looking for here. I have played with couple of guys who were very plain and boring and they had nice certs. There are a lot of gems without certs who rocked my world. Sometimes women make couple comments in certs that make we become interested the way they describe their experience then I do pay attention. I usually avoid couples or guys who have lots of certs it gives me an impression that they fuck anything. It's not just that I am afraid of it. I use condoms. I don't care much about anything it just shows me that they are so bored and need any type of stimulation. I avoid them.
  15. Let me tell you something from our experience. My hubby is bi and we have it clearly stated in our profile. We do know a lot of people in LS who says they are very straight in their profile and not interested in any bi male play, however we know otherwise. They are gladly willing to suck a cock when we start talking more in details about play activities. They are not just willing to let somebody suck them they are interested in playing with a cock. Whenever they are asked they say they are straight guys who would like to suck a cock once in a while. Go figure...
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