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memcme75

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15 Good

About memcme75

  • Rank
    Just Getting Started
  • Birthday 06/10/1976

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    M. Male
  • Location
    Kentucky
  1. Thank you all for the great advice!!!! Yes I veiw it as "just sex" and could do it and walk away without a second thought. (I don't mean that the experiance was bad just that it's just sex. My wife and I make love and share a whole lot more than sex as you all so well know who've been in the lifestyle) I do want to say that I feel I'm competent in the sack I don't want to portray myself as a superman by quoting her, I feel this is her defense mechinism for telling me no. I think she has some insecurities that she needs to over come. I married a woman that looks nothing like she did in high school but see's herself that way... Honestly she's so hot now when we went to her high school reunion nobody reconized her and she turned every head in the room. But she thinks everyone is just being nice.. hence the song "She don't know she's beautiful" is an understatement.. I do believe the right time and right place awayfrom the bedroom and alcohol would be a good place to start.. Thank you.... Does anyone have any advice on how to bring it up? how to ask without asking? that type of thing, just to break the ice.
  2. I would never "sneak" around and do anything or set anything up without her knowledge, just to be clear, I have never cheated. But I have figured out if it's her idea then it's ok, if it's mine then not so much. hence part of the thread title. She is extremely smart and can smell bull**it a mile a way. Like I said one minute she's all for doing anything but letting me have sex with another woman, the next she acts like she could care less if we ever do anything. Then on occasion (usually during heated love making after we get home from dancing and buzzed up) she will bring it up but only while she is buzzed and very worked up. she will talk about a ffm 3some or a full swap and tell me she wants to see it, then I'll bring it up a day or so later and she will tell me it was just talk but if it's something I really want to do she will let me but she's not sure how she will handle it. I don't want her to "let me" do something if she has reservations and I wouldn't go through with it if I had any thought that she may be uncomfortable no matter how worked up I am, I just want to play fair but be fair to her as well. I have come to terms with me situation and can live with what I have with no regrets I just reached out for a little advice for bringing it up and making her more comfortable in reaching the final level so to speak. I want her to enjoy watching me as well as I do while I watch her.
  3. I'm seeking a little advice... I've been married to a great woman for 12+ years, and I have been completely faithful the whole time. When we first got married we were at some friends' house and after a few (several) drinks we ended up playing then full different room swapping with them. There was NO female play at all, she swore she had no interest in women and the thought repulsed her - it was a "straight" swap. It only happened once and we are still great friends, it does come up from time to time in a light humorous conversation but that's as far at it will ever go again (my wife and I just don't want to go there with them again). Okay...We didn't do anything with anyone from the 1st play date until year 8 or 9. We became friends with a couple who lived about an hour away, she was attractive but he wasn't so much. After hanging out with them a few times we ended up back at their house all of us full of liquid courage. We sat on their couch with him and I on each end and the ladies in the middle. They (the other couple) started kissing next thing I knew my wife and I were kissing, then out of the blue the other lady started rubbing my wife's leg. Then they started kissing... oh hell yeah!! Sorry..lol To make a long story short we ended up soft swapping with the ladies putting on one hell of a show for us... my wife liked it so much she even met the other woman for some 1 on 1 girl time. Needless to say she's admittedly Bi for life. Anyway, that lasted over the course of one winter then they moved away We didn't do anything else for about a year. Then I brought a buddy of mine in to fulfill her fantasy... a MMF 3some. She loved it and we've been doing that off and on for about a year and plan on continuing. She is also actively seeking females whenever we go out to clubs. Here's my problem, I would like to full swap and she doesn't really want to. I get off watching her do everything and I only want the same in return. Her excuse is (please don't think I'm arrogant I'm direct quoting) "You're so good I'm afraid that who ever has sex with you will try to steal you." Now we have a great sex life (talking about me and her) I am an average man and do anything I can to please her sexually. Then she tells me she doesn't know if she could watch me having sex with another woman (oral is ok as long as she is occupied with her man). When I mention it the only response I get is "You just want to be with another woman with my approval." This isn't fair, I won't use the threesome as leverage because I will only get a "I don't care if we ever do it again" response. And I don't feel that is a viable reason to do something (leverage or guilt trips only lead to disaster). Am I the only one? Is there a way to move us toward the lifestyle? I'm not looking to do it every weekend but just from time to time. She doesn't want to try any swinger networking sites. We tried that but she has a problem hooking up with just anyone on the internet (understandable) and says if it happens it happens but we are never in a situation for it to "just happen". I could try to be sneaky but I don't think it's fair when three out of four people involved know what time it is, that is a recipe for a divorce when you start keeping secrets. Am I destined for just MMF threesomes or is there a way I can "nudge" things along? Thanks for reading this. Your advice would mean a lot.
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