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exploringRM

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exploringRM last won the day on February 24 2011

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About exploringRM

  • Rank
    Lifestyle Mentor
  • Birthday 12/21/1959

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Couple - he posts/reads
  • Location
    York, PA
  • Swinging Experience
    Since Nov 2008

Swinger Info

  • SLS Name
    hereforfunrm
  • Favorite Club(s)
    Tabu, TPA, TJ's

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  1. As cplnuswing points out there should be no expectations. Many times at house parties it's being in the right place at the right time, as well as taking some initiative. He needs to grow up as other people do or will notice this moping. If he never got any play then perhaps it's an issue but it seems that he does get play time..so there is nothing wrong with him. Sometimes at parties I would get a number of play partners in an evening and other times, none. I'm a bit selective and will not just find match for play sake but typically have a "to do" list.
  2. I focus on my partner and make sure she has an enjoyable time. That being said, my wife and I are here for our enjoyment not the other way round. Not at the expense of others, but there is some selfishness in being selective on who we play with. So it's not ALL about us, but we are not going to put ourselves into a situation where we won't have the best of time.
  3. How about hotel parties that are posted on SLS? If your are not receiving invites from previous hosts, it's time to network out; find new people and hope that a invite will follow at some point.
  4. 1) We are not 100% private on the swing sites. We will past face pictures public. Some topless shots (no face public). PG-13 and R rated pictures are password protected. 2) Main reason for being private is this is not an activity accepted by many so we want to avoid being found out. 3) We don't have an outed story but do have a few funny things along the way. - Early on in swinging we were trying the "meet people in a bar first" to get to know each other. That never really worked out for us, but we had our first meeting at a bar a similar distance from us and the other couple. So we were sitting at a table chatting and my Wife's -Mom's-boyfriend's-daughter comes over the say high. Apparently this bar is their normal watering hole, close to their house. So this information got back to my wife's mom and she was asking who were those people? Why were you all the way over there? We just said a friend of mine from college. But geez our first meeting in a bar where we thought would be a bit out of the way. - When we first started swinging we were also in a wine group (vanilla) on meetup.com. I was telling female co-worker about the wine group when she heard meetup she asked if we were swingers (jokingly). I probably turned shades of red and just said Yes! (jokingly). - At a new years eve party we typically attend, we spend the evening. The next day, at a family dinner, my mom asked if we all swapped around in the bedrooms! (She was 90 at the time). Yikes! - Last fall we had plans to go to the Finger Lakes (wine country) in New York, staying a number of days at a house with a number of l/s couples. (we never made it as I was just out of the hospital for an unexpected stay). But our daughter (25 y/o at the time) asked if she could drive up on Saturday and visit us. She knows many of the couples. I said well it wasn't my trip to plan and we were invited so not sure if you can go. She said that's ok, you will all be running around naked anyway. (She knows we went to a nude beach in Hedo with another couple). She knows we are a bit wild but I don't think she knows the full extent. - Another time we came home from an event very late, but our daughter (21 at the time) had waited up for us (I think her best friend was over too). The event involved mardi gras beads and my wife had forgotten to take them off. Our daughter exclaims. "Why are you wearing boobie beads!!!!"
  5. From the expression you have to kiss a lot of frogs (to find your prince).
  6. Though another type would be ones that arrange meets at a swing club. We go that way as well as parties. Long ago we gave up on the dinner/drinks approach. Too many "frogs".
  7. We have a number of swing clubs within 1-2 hours of us and most are very nice but 1 or 2 are more on the run down side. There's a wide range out there.
  8. I think people show wear arm band colors indicating their activity: nudist, swinger soft swap, swinger full swap, swinger threesome only, etc. Would save a lot of "marketing" time
  9. Have been to Hedo but not Desire. Agree with funcoupledayton though. Hedo can be hit or miss. If you bring your own group it could be fun, but the dynamics there vary upon what other groups may be there (swingers, versus nudists, etc)
  10. I always say each swing parter needs to come with an instruction manual It may not be something they are used to..and during oral it can be hard to keep focused/on-target if the target keeps moving. My wife moves alot too. I don't like a woman that just lays there, so I'm ok with movement.
  11. I would leave the profile up but put in your status that you are taking a break. At least you still can maintain contact with people you know, review local events, etc.
  12. So you would like to host a swinger party at your house. A number of things you need to decide: - Invite only people you know? - Invite people you know, but perhaps allow them to invite another couple? - How many couples do you want to invite? - Invite people you don't know? - Do you have areas in the house appropriate for play? Do you need to purchase blow up mattresses, sheets, etc.? - Are there areas in your house you don't want people in (typically closed doors take care of that)? - Are you going to ask guests to bring a snack to share? Are you serving food? - Do you have accommodations (bed/air mattress/sheets/pillow) for some people to stay over if needed? Parties we host as well as attend are typically bring your own booze and condoms. We'll supply soft drinks, water, and usually a few bottles of wine. Window coverings...you don't want neighbors and passers-by looking in. Noise...keep windows closed. So of course first you need to invite people, not much of a party without that The invite list is hard to put together as 1) There will be a number of people that decline right away, or accept and don't wind up attending for some reason and 2) If you account for no shows and create a larger invite list, you may find that EVERYONE shows up so you need to make sure you have room. Here's how we prepare, your mileage may vary: - Clean clean clean. - Prep food, soft drinks, get ice, etc. - In each bathroom have mouthwash and disposable cups. - In each bathroom have a bundle of clean washcloths, and a bucket/basket to put the dirty cloths into. You can get washcloths pretty cheap a Wal-Mart, Target, etc. - In our upstairs bathroom have towels available in case anyone wants a shower. - Clear our areas where we as going to put blow up mattresses. For us that means moving a few coffee tables. - Put sheets or comforters on any beds that are used for play. - Have towels available in the play areas for covering the bed...for the wet spots! - We have a hot tub and ask people to bring towels, but will put out extras in case people forget. - Though people usually bring their own condoms we will put a few out here and there. After all of the guests have arrived, and people have been talking a bit, but before play, we go over any "rules", bathroom locations, play area locations, etc. The only "rules" we go over is no means no (especially if your spouse says it! lol) and areas of the house not to go in. A closed door on the bedroom means do not disturb. Since we may be outside in the hot tub, remind people that the neighbors are not that far away so avoid any sex sounds!
  13. Is it any different than big boobs versus small boobs; skinny/curvy; etc. Everyone has their attraction strike zones. My wife prefers men over 5' 9". She is 5' 8". Is it always deal breaker, no, but in general it's a weeding out point when viewing profiles online.
  14. Plan an event yourself, perhaps hit local wineries or brew pubs in the afternoon, then schedule the party for after (either at a hotel or a helpful friend's house). Our group has moved to starting to play earlier. And if we do hit a local night club/bar we are usually back at a hotel or house by 11 p.m. and play starts soon after. Even in my younger days I doubt I would be able to perform well starting to play at 3 a.m.!
  15. When we've been invited to a hotel room, it;s been in the name of one couple. not everyone is checked in. Even when I rented a two room suite for a party it was all in my name. I would avoid spending the entire night together unless you are really close friends and even then have experience with that. Sometimes drama ensues.
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