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ross_sally

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About ross_sally

  • Rank
    Contributor
  • Birthday 04/01/1961

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    couple
  • Location
    Illinois
  1. I think your solution was fair, you play when together, and she limits her playing to the number of times you and her agree to, WITH couples, when you are gone. But from what you said, you two are so different in regards to sexual needs/wants, she will not be able to follow your compromise. If you try and control it, she will sneak it. But if you try and pretend it's OK, you will go crazy, as your value system appears to now want a faithful wife and mother more than a player. I really agree with what safireblues said, all of it. You are going to need the whole truth. maybe even a DNA test. Good luck, it's not easy, but you're a survivor!
  2. "if you don't have some measure of trust with your playmates and/or the lifestyle in general, the you probably should take a pass." Sally and I got really close to experimenting with this lifestyle, but we just can't get over the odds of getting HSV or HPV... for ever and ever. Exchanging STD tests will never be accepted, so we should probably take a pass, at least for now.
  3. "I see her husband reach over to my husband abd start rubbing his balls, then stroking his cock, my husband laid back and let it happen" OMG eeeeewwwwwwwwww! NOT for Ross, NO way, NO how Sorry, but I'd rather screw your grandmother.
  4. I agree. Slut is in the eye of the beholder. And it all started with that dirty little slut June Clever. Did you notice she never wore panties?! What a filthy, naughty slut! Or that other nasty bitch, Ginger. Now there was a class A slut that needed to be spanked all over her slutty little ass! But shaking your tits at a Club? No, not slutty. And men dig it.
  5. Thank all that posted above, I really appreciate your sharing. As you said, I'm sure many more others "play" and don't mention it, thinking no visible sores? no need to tell. Maybe after time, hiding it becomes the norm through rationalizations. [Edit] I just read more of the posts, including #16, again I appreciate the honesty, that is, the honesty for posting that you are not honest with other swingers. "The Doc didn't seem to think it matters that much, said 75% of the world has it." versus an earlier post from the math genius stating "less than 1%" !!!!!!!!! WTF?!! Me wonders how many others are reading this thread, cringing, having almost forgotten that they have Herpes. Hmmmm.. Amazing, and again thanks for the dose of reality, you will be fine, and your honesty should be commended. I've heard that the outbreaks get further and further apart with time.
  6. I voted FMF, I thought that was the proverbial fantasy for males, but apparently not.
  7. The question is ... "Are these STD numbers correct?" HIV is one small subset of STD's. Why ignore all the other STD's? And secondly, as I mentioned, it's inaccurate to increase your base with irrelevant populations. Namely, the fear of contracting an STD comes only from the sexually active population, not the whole population, which includes the non-sexually active. So your very first figure,(1/3 of a percent) is not correct.
  8. Julie, thanks for taking the time to explain the lack of user reviews for Clubs. I understand now. And also thanks for cutting to the chase regarding the thread subject.
  9. Pee Wee, I believe you can speak for yourself. You don't know what other Club owners are doing, and the comment above makes perfect sense. I wasn't the one that started this Thread, but it's understandably a big concern for all involved. But what I find disturbing in addition to hidden videos, is that someone was apparently afraid to even offer the discussion up to this board .... "I was sent the below question via email and asked to post it anonymously" is how this thread was started. There are incredible open discussions here about many things you can't discuss anywhere else, (which I appreciate and think the host is wonderful ) ..... with the glowing exception of CLUB REVIEWS?! What's with that? A Club review was what brought me here originally. But oddly enough, with the number of people on this board, and the number of couples said to go to the Club parties, "60 -80 couples", THERE ARE EITHER 2, 1, or NO REVIEWS for the 5 Clubs I looked up? And this goes back through a few YEARS. Take your Club Pee Wee, 2 reviews in 3 years? 2 pretty good reviews, but this review below being the last one from over 3 years ago?!! 01-02-2005, 10:59 AM "The club itself was small with a decent atmosphere. The dance floor was probably 20X20 and the music was good. The couples there were a somewhat older crowd. Probably 80% in the over-40 crowd. We were a bit disappointed. It was the New Years Eve social." User reviews are HUGE on the internet now! So what's up with this? Is there an unwritten rule we can't talk about the Clubs here?
  10. NJCouple's experience is how ours transpired, up to the point of actually swinging. She gets close, then backs off. I'm fine with waiting until it's right for her.
  11. "and everything else (including any form of Herpes) is not even mentioned" Why would they not mention Herpes and HPV, which are the highest risks? Does that mean they are acceptable consequences in Europe? Mark, I agree that the CDC is motivated to skew the numbers, but your application of percentages and methodology in getting to less than 1% for your situation is not correct. And as far as being selectively careful. It seems that that relies on swingers being 100% honest or going in with a magnifying glass with a light, neither being very practical. And what about the fact that the STD can be contagious without being visible, as mentioned above? When the other party is fine NOT wearing a condom, I feel I need to wear a condom, even though I don't like condoms, and when they insist on wearing a condom, I feel better that they are DF. Maybe it's flawed, but I believe someone that already has Herpes or HPV, obviously isn't worried about contracting it.
  12. I was told that the Clubs take hidden video, just for assurance to "have" something on would be trouble makers.
  13. Well your method is apparently working, which is great. Is the detraction and feeling loss of wearing a condom worth the perceived risk reduction of an STD? That's obviously a personal choice. And don't get me wrong, I HATE condoms, but I don't want a 'never gone' STD, and you have to believe that 'Ladies of the night' require the use of condoms for some reason.
  14. Are those STD numbers correct? Fooz, I'm sure they are, but applying them is the difficult part. Using the US population of 304,000,000 to get to 20% is not very accurate for the context of this forum / community. Doesn't that number include millions of people under 14 and over 70, people in monogamous marriages, and so on? Should you include a person with a total of 10 sexual partners in a category with a person who has had 200 sexual partners? That would be like looking at the risk of cancer and putting a smoker in the same bucket as a non smoker, (just dividing the # of cancer deaths by total population) OR ... Like saying your odds of losing money at a casino are 1 to 1 (50%) because you include millions of people that NEVER actually gamble. The odds of losing money for many people is 0 because they don't gamble and for others it's maybe 1.5 to 1 because they do. Also, we talked about HPV here earlier and I thought the percent of woman having it at this point in their lives, (over 30 yo) was over 50%? Is HPV on that CDC list? Under another name? And if it is, I thought it was more common to get than Herpes? Which is at 50,000,000. ------------------------------------------------------------- And Condoms, false sense of protection? STD's can be transmitted by other skin contact? If a condom covers 70% (use whatever figure you want) of the contact area, then it will reduce the risk of an STD by roughly 70%. (less than 70%, they sometimes break/come off) Simply put, it's not 100% protection, but it's much better than 0% protection. Insurance companies are experts at evaluating risk. How do you think they would rate the risk of this lifestyle and not using condoms? My guess is, that you could multiply your CDC figure of 20% by a factor of 3 or 4! So Wildthingplus, if you have gone 10 years and are D free? Amazing, you are very lucky, that's like winning the lottery kind of lucky! Having said all that, I'm still interested::P:
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