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  1. #1

    Default Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    Hi all. I'm a newbie from Northern Michigan here. What's prompted me to get on various swinger boards is the one most common fantasy my wife shares with me is wanting to be fucklicked. We often discuss fantasies of a threesome or foursome while in bed Doing so seems to really get her hot. Me too! I'm totally OK with doing a MFM with her, or whatever other combo she's willing to try. I've told her that as well, usually as she sharing her fantasy me responding " I'm ok with that". But that's where it ends.

    She's pretty conservative in public. A club setting absolutely out. Kind of shy. Mid fifties. Great shape and good looking. We've been married over 30 years. She's a "thinker", so I'm concerned if it's something pre arranged, such she's expecting it, she will over think it, and back out. That leads me to consider doing some prescreening, arrange a meeting with a candidate, likely a few meetings and let some chemistry start and see where it goes from there. Perhaps find someone with common interests (camping and motorcycling are our areas of interest BTW). Let a friendship develop first. But that seems disingenuous.

    How do I best move this to the next stage and actually do something? Thanks in advance for your input!



    Steve


  2. #2
    Swingers Board Addict agreatguy's Avatar
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    Couple - Man posting

    Default Re: Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    Quote Originally Posted by SteveD300 View Post
    Hi all. I'm a newbie from Northern Michigan here. What's prompted me to get on various swinger boards is the one most common fantasy my wife shares with me is wanting to be fucklicked. We often discuss fantasies of a threesome or foursome while in bed Doing so seems to really get her hot. Me too! I'm totally OK with doing a MFM with her, or whatever other combo she's willing to try. I've told her that as well, usually as she sharing her fantasy me responding " I'm ok with that". But that's where it ends.

    She's pretty conservative in public. A club setting absolutely out. Kind of shy. Mid fifties. Great shape and good looking. We've been married over 30 years. She's a "thinker", so I'm concerned if it's something pre arranged, such she's expecting it, she will over think it, and back out. That leads me to consider doing some prescreening, arrange a meeting with a candidate, likely a few meetings and let some chemistry start and see where it goes from there. Perhaps find someone with common interests (camping and motorcycling are our areas of interest BTW). Let a friendship develop first. But that seems disingenuous.

    How do I best move this to the next stage and actually do something? Thanks in advance for your input!



    Steve
    If you're doing the friendship thing with ulterior motives it is disingenuous at least to her. I'm guessing the other guy would know what you are up to but guys that you find who would be ok with the plan are probably not going to be as patient as you would like or need him to be. My observation is that genuinely good guys get snatched up pretty quickly and aren't single for long. So you court this guy for a few weeks or months, get to know him, become friends and next thing you know he is in some new relationship that he would prefer to pay attention to rather than yours. Why? because he's getting laid with her and not your wife. Now he's out of the picture. Oh, you can find douche bags that will say or do anything to get laid but is that the kind of guy you want to spend a lot of time working on building a "friendship" with?

    The reality is you're going to have to find a way to talk to her about it. Many couples fantasize about this lifestyle, few actually do it. There's a hurdle you sometimes have to get over. It's that voice inside your head that tells you something isn't right. There's a name for it but I can't for the life of me remember what it is. It's the same voice that tells you that you shouldn't jump out of an airplane, rappel off of a cliff or stick yourself with a hypodermic needle. Lot's of people imagine themselves skydiving but can't take the step in actuality.
    You have to first find out if this is something she wants to do for real or just keep as a fantasy. If it's real, now you've opened the box and can talk about how she sees that happening and move forward from there. Just be sure not to pressure her. Move at her pace whatever that happens to be.

    I'm curious as to why clubs are totally off the table. That would be a place where things could happen organically and without too much time to overthink things.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    Thanks great guy. That's exactly my concern. If I were to describe ideal it would be we connect with a couple with common interests, then working into more. But...hard to find

    Reason for no clubs, first nothing within 2.5 hours of here. Secondly, she's to private and discreet, shy to be in that sort of environment. Much more likely with a single or couple.

  4. #4

    Default Re: Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    Oh to the point of friendship developing first, boils down to assuring compatibility, and secondly, her getting a sense of comfort.

  5. #5
    Swingers Board Addict agreatguy's Avatar
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    Couple - Man posting

    Default Re: Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    Quote Originally Posted by SteveD300 View Post
    Thanks great guy. That's exactly my concern. If I were to describe ideal it would be we connect with a couple with common interests, then working into more. But...hard to find

    Reason for no clubs, first nothing within 2.5 hours of here. Secondly, she's to private and discreet, shy to be in that sort of environment. Much more likely with a single or couple.

    You're going to have to find a way to meet like minded people. That means putting yourself "out there" to a certain extent. With the demise of Craigslist personals I think you're pretty much limited to the swinger's websites. This is going to require building a profile, putting up some photos, even if they don't show your face, but most likely at some point sharing some face photos.

    A club 2.5 hours away is going to be way more discreet in actuality for most people. Make it a long sexy weekend. Shy is a different issue but you will find people in clubs to be pretty engaging as long as you can make yourselves approachable even if you aren't the type to approach others. If she's hot they will come! If you have the personality to break the ice just let her follow your lead and watch how she opens up. Once she realizes she's in control(the women make the rules) she'll likely become more receptive to advances. That's what happened with my wife. She laughs about being a hermit. She really isn't that bad but she's not a social extrovert...Now that she's comfortable with the club setting she's engaging and seductive in that environment. She seems to see it as a challenge and she's pretty damn good at it.

  6. #6

    Default Re: Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    Don't get it complicated. Marriage, sex, friendship are all discreet singular items, we make it complex by putting them together. If she wants a fuck-lick , that is what she wants. I can only give our experience. We are also 3 hours away from any club and never been to one. That is why we are not member sin any club. No one in our vicinity knows what we are up to and will never know. We found Hedonism and fulfill all our fantasies there. No need to build towards anything make elaborate plans with ulterior motives , just be open to receive and give and you will be flooded with offers that you may have to decline.
    www.amazon.com/author/venusshaw
    www.swingersexdiaries.com

  7. #7

    Default Re: Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    I'm not sure how to tell you how to work your way into the act of your wife being "fuck-licked" since that probably varies greatly from wife to wife. If my late wife is an example, I can assure you that you won't have to talk her into it the second time. So, if this is her fantasy, talk to her a lot. Explore ideas. Keep your eyes open for partners. We preferred couples but beware! You will have two women who won't have to be talked into it the second time.

    After we found that magic couple, Laura and I (and the other couple) found the following description worked best.

    A couch works better than a bed. Start with the women sitting on the couch with the men kneeling between their legs. Don't get in a hurry. Laura liked to have me start at the bottom of her slit, using my tongue to gently spread the labia sideways, slowing working myself up until the labia was spread widely along the length and above her clit, which would be standing erect and anxious. After the ladies have had enough of this (may take awhile) both of the men should sit on the couch and lean comfortably back while the ladies climb aboard.

    Laura liked to start out face to face with her chosen fucker. (She liked kissing.) Eventually, the fuckee-lickee would turn around into reverse cowgirl position and reinsert the fucker's penis. Both would spread their legs and the licker would kneel between them. I've never questioned my sexuality so I wasn't put off by working around my friend's penis to (once again) spread the labia away with my tongue until her clit was once again standing firm at the top, easily licked.

    One challenge to look out for at this stage is that the fucker's cock tends to slip out when the action becomes enthusiastic. This can be avoided by the licker pursing his lips and tongue around the clit while using his chin to hold the fucker's cock in place.

    The lady who is not "It" can amuse herself by alternately kissing the fucker and the lady who is "It."

    After a sufficient number of orgasms, which varies with individuals, the other lady can become "It" and the fucker and licker can exchange assignments.

    One very pleasant variation is for one of the ladies to be the licker. Laura was fond of this as well because, at the proper time, she could help herself to a treat of man-cream.

    Keep experimenting and report back to this forum.
    "They may call me a rube and a hick, but I'd a lot rather be the man who bought the Brooklyn Bridge than the man who sold it." —Will Rogers

  8. #8

    Default Re: Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    It sounds like I need to find that right time to have that more specific "let's do this " conversation first. I'm sure finding a single male won't be all that hard to find, it's just finding the right one (that is hard).

  9. #9

    Default Re: Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    Great Guy,

    You mentioned building profile and pics etc. Im rather uncomfortable with the risks of someone identifying either of us locally. Any suggestions on how to do as you say in getting out there, while minimizing those risks?


  10. #10
    Swingers Board Addict agreatguy's Avatar
    Status
    Couple - Man posting

    Default Re: Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    Quote Originally Posted by SteveD300 View Post
    Great Guy,

    You mentioned building profile and pics etc. Im rather uncomfortable with the risks of someone identifying either of us locally. Any suggestions on how to do as you say in getting out there, while minimizing those risks?
    If I could solve that problem I'd write a book and become a millionaire. LOL

  11. #11

    Default Re: Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    You mentioned building profile and pics etc. Im rather uncomfortable with the risks of someone identifying either of us locally.
    Have pictures that have your faces edited out and only send the face pictures (or unedited pictures) to prospective couples so you can recognize each other when you meet. The pictures are usually to prove that you are real and to see if there is any interest. At the same time, anyone who would find your pictures on a swingers site...well, they are there for the same reason you are and don't want to be 'found out' any more than you do. If you don't bait a hook and drop it into the water you won't ever catch anything and anyone else with a pole and bait are looking to catch fish too. Don't be too concerned, as long as you take minimal precautions, you'll be fine.
    If you don’t have to lie about sex, you don’t have to lie about anything. - John Williamson

  12. #12
    Swingers Board Addict agreatguy's Avatar
    Status
    Couple - Man posting

    Default Re: Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    Quote Originally Posted by GoldCoCouple View Post
    Have pictures that have your faces edited out and only send the face pictures (or unedited pictures) to prospective couples so you can recognize each other when you meet. The pictures are usually to prove that you are real and to see if there is any interest. At the same time, anyone who would find your pictures on a swingers site...well, they are there for the same reason you are and don't want to be 'found out' any more than you do. If you don't bait a hook and drop it into the water you won't ever catch anything and anyone else with a pole and bait are looking to catch fish too. Don't be too concerned, as long as you take minimal precautions, you'll be fine.
    ^^^That's generally good advice Steve. I'd add that you'll need to get a paid membership and limit who can see your profile only to those who are paid as well. I'm expanding on GoldCOCouples reasoning just a bit. PAID members are likely there for the same reason. Unpaid members maybe not so much, they may be lurking, trolling or who knows what other motives they may have. Keep your profile hidden from them for sure.

  13. #13

    Default Re: Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    Definitely don't use images from any of your social networking accounts etc, the pictures can be reverse searched on Google and it will bring up your Facebook profile or whichever account the picture is from

  14. #14

    Default Re: Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    Quote Originally Posted by Scaredstiff View Post
    Definitely don't use images from any of your social networking accounts etc, the pictures can be reverse searched on Google and it will bring up your Facebook profile or whichever account the picture is from
    You probably should make sure NOTHING is recognizable, especially by anyone who knows you, including backgrounds. So either use a plain background, somewhere completely different, or edit out the background. And never use those photos for anything else - keep them just for this. You would be surprised how some tiny detail in a photo can be recognized and identify you. Also be careful about things like tattoos, unique birthmarks, etc. and cover or blur them out if necessary.

  15. #15

    Default Re: Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    The more you reach out to swingers you don't know, the more likely it is that someone you don't want to discover you will. While it may afford a better chance of finding like-minded people, the potential exposure multiplies.

    Like any other aspect of life, the more you hide of yourselves, the less likely you will find someone curious enough to seek you out.

    Laura and I sought playmates among people we met casually, in-line at a fast-serve pizza place, in a bookstore, at a rodeo, etc. It's best to learn about their personalities and use wisdom in deciding to ask the magic question, "How do y'all feel about swinging?" Your wife, not you, needs to do the asking.

    Good luck!
    "They may call me a rube and a hick, but I'd a lot rather be the man who bought the Brooklyn Bridge than the man who sold it." —Will Rogers

  16. #16

    Default Re: Wife'sfantasy is being fucklicked. Not sure how to make it happen.

    Great advise on submitting edited pics, Alura!
    And also having the wife pop that magic question!
    Ed

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