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My wife and I are curious about swinging and have been looking into a trip to Desire Pearl or Riviera Maya.

 

Right now we have mutually agreed that our boundaries would include watching, being watched, group sex with each other, and maybe some soft play with another female. Excited about just being nude and playing around others for a start.

 

I was curious if a resort was the best first choice or if a club would be a better option. Or is there an option we are not aware of?

 

We want to be discreet and are nervous about a club in our area. Any recommendations for a good club in a city for a weekend getaway?

 

Basically looking for the right suggestion to test the waters and not jump into the deep end right away to make sure it is right for us.

 

Any suggestions would be appreciated.

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We are looking seriously at spending a few days at Pearl. Just need to figure out the dates at this point.

 

Here has been our perspective leading up to the decision to go. We've been club people for the most part. My wife's biggest concern with the resorts is that you're kind of committed. If it turns out not to be what you expected then you're stuck perhaps not having a good time, being uncomfortable, hiding out in your room or whatever.

 

Now that we've experienced the clubs and talked to people that go to Desire and Hedo we feel like Pearl best represents what we feel we want and what we get from our favorite club. There are all different types looking for different things. Some want to swap, some want to watch and some want to just hang out nekkid in a sexy atmosphere. We tested the waters by just going and watching, then playing with each other and finally involving others. There's no judgement and no pressure. You aren't going to know how that feels until you've experienced it a few times.

 

My advice is to try a club to test the waters and limit your commitment knowing you can leave at any time. You'll both be more comfortable just knowing that. Depending on where you are in Texas you have decent clubs in Houston, San Antonio, Austin and Dallas or you could even go to NOLA. Don't be too nervous about attending one in your own city though unless you are really high profile. If you meet someone there you know just know that they are there for the same reason and it's in everyone's best interest to keep what happens inside the club inside the club.

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If you go to Desire RM or Pearl, you will have a nice tropical vacation even if you do not have a lifestyle experience. No one will force you to do anything. More LS activity at RM than Pearl.

 

Clubs we liked include Trapeze, Ft. Lauderdale, FL., Colette’s in Dallas or New Orleans.

 

Let us know what you do!

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To start off a club is probably the easier option. Either option, however, is going to be fine. Desire is a clothing optional resort that is swinger friendly...that means you can wear clothes or not, it's optional, and swinging is not a requirement (or even expected). Even if you go to a club, 99% of the people there will ask before they do anything (there's always that rude 1%) and even if someone touches or does something unwelcome, just telling them to stop will end whatever they are doing (or the risk getting removed). The hardest part of going to a club is walking in the door...everything becomes easier after that. If you are worried that you might see someone you know (and like most swingers, you probably don't want anyone you know to know), just remember anyone else that you see there is there for the same reason as you and probably doesn't want anyone to know they are there as well. It rarely becomes an issue because the chances of running into someone you know is VERY slight, but we understand your worry.

 

Either option will work. Desire will give you a great sexy vacation even if nothing happens (but so much CAN happen if you want it to) and a club will give you a less expensive, easier way to dip your toes in the water without having to cross international borders. Let us know what you decide to do...

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My wife and I have been talking about testing the waters in a club for about a year now. It looks like we are going for the first time this coming weekend (probably Colette).

 

Neither of us are sure if swinging is a good option for us (after 8 years together). But, we have talked about trying new things in our marriage so much, that we need to at least take the first step finally.

 

We are both very outgoing, social and open-minded. But, we are both very picky and would need to be seduced by others who are classy and sex is second to the seduction.

 

My wife is beautiful (5'6", 124lbs) and will draw a lot of attention (and she is a bit of an exhibitionist). While I am excited by our decision to go this weekend, I am also pretty nervous. I have visions of every eye being on my wife as we walk through the door, like she is a piece of meat. Walking through the door and settling in is going to be the most difficult part for me I think. But, it is time to dip our toes in the water. There is only one way to find things out.

 

FWIW-we have discussed all our boundaries already (very few). So, there should not be any surprises.

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Relax. Go with no expectations except that you'll have fun.

 

As far as looking at her as if she's a piece of meat, no one who ever got in my wife's pants ever felt that way. Instead, reasonable men think of a lovely woman as a flower, something that is beautiful to look at and smell.

 

Remember, you'll be looking at other wives, too.

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Maybe: So how did it go?

 

Hello. Since everyone has been so helpful on this forum, I wanted to check in and give our first timers report. This is not really an erotic post. So, feel free to skip it if no interested.

 

We arrived at Colette Dallas about 9:30, which is a little too early IMO. As everyone here had said, the hardest part was walking through the door. As first timers, we received the grand tour from the host. Being a saturday night and also sdc.com night, it was really packed later. I would say there were easily 200 couples with most late arrivals (around midnight). For us as first timers, the big crowd was a plus as it allowed us to see the different types of people that the club attracts and meet lots of different people.

 

It didn't take very long for us to settle in and become comfortable socializing with other couples. The dance floor was lively and that led to a lot of social interaction.

 

As has been said in the forum, everyone that we met were friendly and patient with us being first timers. Nobody was pushy and boundaries were respected. Yes we were propositioned. But, it was done with class.

 

I think the way LS clubs will work for us in the future is that we will go with no expectations, only to have fun with similar, open-minded couples and individuals. We certainly like the sexually charged environment. If the right situation comes up, we are both open to the idea of taking it further. We trust each other and agreed that no boundaries were needed. If something more had happened that night, I really think we would be comfortable with anything that took place. We considered playing in one of the private rooms with each other before leaving, to break the ice. But, all the curtains were drawn as it was packed. In fact, you could barely make it through the hallways where the semi-private and private rooms were located.

 

We also noticed that most women seem either full bi or at least bi curious. I was asked a lot if my wife plays with other women. My response was that while she is open-minded and would play along, she really prefers men. At least, those have been my wife's words to me. I am not sure if bi or bi-curious women are ok with that or not.

 

Overall, we had a blast. after the first hour we thought it might be a short night. But, it was 2:30 before we left. Would we return to Colette (or another club) ? Absolutely. It just won't be a frequent thing for us. But, the door has been opened and there was nothing negative to turn us off in the future.

 

I know there is not much erotic here about my reply. But, it might help other first timers that are nervous about taking the leap.

 

Cheers

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Sounds like it couldn't have been a better first outing. You got to take it all in and you now get to digest all that you saw and heard.

Talking about the future possibilities which will most likely be a turn on and will have you looking forward to the next step.

 

It's not a frequent thing for us either and much of that has to do with the late hour that everything gets started. This is a part of our life but not our life. We like to do other things vanilla things as well so resting up on the day of, getting home at 4 in the morning and sleeping in means it really kind of consumes a whole weekend for us.

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Maybe: It doesn't matter if it is an erotic post or not. We wanted to hear your your experience was (and you did a very good job describing it)...this post will help others in the future. Great that you enjoyed yourself. I guess that too many people is almost as bad as not enough people. Anyways, thanks for sharing and we hope to hear about your next step.

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It's not a frequent thing for us either and much of that has to do with the late hour that everything gets started. This is a part of our life but not our life. We like to do other things vanilla things as well so resting up on the day of, getting home at 4 in the morning and sleeping in means it really kind of consumes a whole weekend for us.

 

This is a great point and something we discussed afterwards. We usually stay out until around midnight these days. But, the fun really didn't get started until after midnight on saturday. We finally got to sleep around 5:00am (after playing at home) and pretty much slept in the entire day on sunday. So yes, going out like that again will need to be a weekend event :)

 

Still, we both said it was worth it. I can see the next time being unscheduled, when we are already out on the time and decide to pop in after midnight.

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Yes, heading to a swing club for us was often a twenty-four hour experience. Starting to get ready at 5:00, hitting the club well after dark, staying until it closed, driving home, reclamation sex, and then trying to recover.

 

A foursome swap or threesomes, if you decide to get into that, aren't as lengthy. Yes, you start at 5:00, but the party seems to end earlier, so you get some good sleep after they (or you,) leave.

 

Have fun!

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