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Question on responding to emails..

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We just recently updated our profile on SLS, and we have been receiving quite a few emails, our question. We see some emails that seem like a nice couple to hang out with but not to play, how would you respond to that? (Note that we are also open to new friends, not just play dates)

 

2nd how do you politely refuse and invitation?

(Note that this is an invitation from couples that we may run into in the Bliss cruise, and that can get awkward.)

 

3rd question, and sorry to sound so naive but where exactly do you see the meet and greet section in SLS, we live in a popular city (Broward county) but can't seem to find anything that's not a few years old?

 

Thanks in advance.

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1. People wanna meet first to see if there's a connection. Most people dont jump into playdates on first meetings. Specially SLS introductions.

2. Just say you are not interested. Most people would understand :)

3. Go to events or hot dates section to find local events. or you can search profiles near to your region.

 

Hope this helps.

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Meet-n-greet events are sometimes sponsored by groups so you can also join groups that sound intersection to see if the group owner or some other person in the group organizes meets and greets. Example, a group in our area named Rooster's Roadhouse posts dates for meet-n-greet events on their "discussions" page.

 

There is simply no one place to go or on button to push.

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1. I think it's pretty hard to tell if you want to play with someone based on their profile. You can say, "Do you go to x club? maybe we'll see you there." or "We're going to x event, please say hi."

 

2. What kind of invitation? If it's a pre-cruise party or something, they may have friends you are interested in. If it's an invitation to play, you can say, that you don't think you'd be compatible or no thanks. I have heard the cruises are so large that it is hard to find people you've met and like, so I wouldn't worry about it.

 

3. Hot dates and groups. Also ask people who contact you if they are aware of any events.

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Thanks for your responses,

 

Reason for question 1 for example is they seem like a nice couple but way younger then we would like, but we don't want to close doors to potential friends.

 

Question 2 is some emails just seem like a copy and past with no hints that they even read our profile, more like spamming or one liners.

 

We did receive an invitation to a house party from a group, but the husband thinks it's to much of a private setting, and would prefer more of a public meet.

 

Thanks again :)

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A couple of thoughts.

 

One of the things about the LS is that honesty and transparency are prized. For the couple that seems too young,... "Dear [screen name], thanks so much for the kind note. While you seem like a lovely couple, the gap between our ages and yours is sufficiently large that we might be uncomfortable playing with you--or vice versa. Would you consider just meeting for drinks or dinner, with absolutely no expectations of anything more?"

 

Depending on how far away the house party happens to be, you might want to consider attending. Again, a note to the host/hostess can work well for all concerned. "Dear host/hostess, thanks so much for your kind invitation. We were excited to receive it yet have some butterflies: this would be our first house party (if that is indeed the case). We continue to work through our fantasies, intentions and boundaries. It is wonderful to meet you and your guests who are in the LS, but we are not sure of our comfort zone and are taking small steps together. Will this make you or your other guests uncomfortable?"

 

Both notes make the situation transparent for all concerned and make it possible for rejection -- if it occurs-- to be gentle. Our experience is such simple candor is prized. People remember those who are honest and direct with them. Such candor usually reflects self-confidence--knowing who and what you are. That self-confidence is attractive on many levels.

 

As as aside, you have a lovely profile on SLS. Not surprising that you are attracting interest.

 

Kind regards.

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Thank you so much for taking the time and giving us your insight, that's what we were looking for.

 

Cheers,

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We just recently updated our profile on SLS, and we have been receiving quite a few emails, our question. We see some emails that seem like a nice couple to hang out with but not to play, how would you respond to that? (Note that we are also open to new friends, not just play dates)

 

2nd how do you politely refuse and invitation?

(Note that this is an invitation from couples that we may run into in the Bliss cruise, and that can get awkward.)

 

3rd question, and sorry to sound so naive but where exactly do you see the meet and greet section in SLS, we live in a popular city (Broward county) but can't seem to find anything that's not a few years old?

 

Thanks in advance.

 

I think I've been on the other end of the first question a few times. The conversation we had with them was basically them asking us what are expectations were. We answered that we really had no expectations, just want to go out and make friends and if the chemistry is right, maybe we'll end up in the bedroom. You could tell them something like that. That you are mainly looking to make friends first and if something else happens because it feels right, great, if not, whatever. They may just not want to meet after that because all they want is sex, no big deal, just move on.

 

To refuse, you just say sorry not interested and move on. Even if you run in to them, they should understand and avoid you. Really, just because people are in the Lifestyle, does not mean they want to fuck anything that walks. People have preferences and chemistry needs to be there. I've seen some drop dead gorgeous women with great bodies that I'd love to fuck, then they open their mouths and it's all ruined. Same thing for my wife. Even though we are all here to have sex with others and have a good time, that does not mean we are here to just have sex with anyone and have a good time.

 

Don't use SLS so can't really say.

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We must admit that even the suggestions about online swinging did not prepare us for some of the emails we have received, but we are starting to get the hang of it. We already set up a few meets with fellow cruisers, and one local with an older couple, we liked their no pressure approach. We have also rejected a few invites with great looking couples due to their profile. vanity and arrogance is a big turn off for us.

 

Why do most profiles only have pictures of the wife and none of the husband (this is for couples seeking couples), almost feels like the husband is pimping the wife?

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We must admit that even the suggestions about online swinging did not prepare us for some of the emails we have received, but we are starting to get the hang of it. We already set up a few meets with fellow cruisers, and one local with an older couple, we liked their no pressure approach. We have also rejected a few invites with great looking couples due to their profile. vanity and arrogance is a big turn off for us.

 

Why do most profiles only have pictures of the wife and none of the husband (this is for couples seeking couples), almost feels like the husband is pimping the wife?

 

We see that too, only wife pictures, no husband, or only one lame dick or bj pic that gives my wife no indication of what he looks like at all. If we are both sttracted to the wife and they have a decent profile with more than one line, we might message them. When we have though, we typically get no response. I dont think they are really there to find people to play with, just getting thrills showing off a bit i guess.

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I think that there are a lot of people on internet lifestyle sites that have no intention of playing. We've asked couples to meet for vanilla drinks or dinner and it goes on forever with excuses or else no reply. Not the most polite bunch, although we may not be 100% responsive either. Some couples only meet at parties, events, cruises or vacations just to see what (who?) they are getting into. We find them to be a crapshoot and we make connections with newbies who won't play, couples where one or both is very into something we are not so into, etc. We just take it in stride, know that we have each other and keep moving. Last week's tragedy is next week's comedy.

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Yeah, it seems there are. Not sure if they are just new and shy, dont really know what to say so just dont say anything or if they are just there to look. I know when my wife and i started looking, just the looking really turned us on. We would look at the site a bit, get hormy, maybe send a message or reply to one, then go have sex and maybe not go back on the site for a few days. Maybe thats enough for some people.

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