Reality is overwhelming

My wife and I have talked about the lifestyle for a couple years. She has always been the resistant one not necessarily not into the lifestyle but the couples we have tried to meet have turned out to be a bust. This is only two or three couples. I recently gave up the search of a couple because most of the women are bi and my wife is not.

I started looking for a single guy for mfm. I started talking to a guy about three hours away. He displayed a lot of interest in my wife. He comes across as someone who is very proud of his 8" thick cock. We got several pics and one video of him jacking off. I expected my wife to do as she always does and just brush it off.

We exchanged cell numbers so we could all text for easier communication. We set up a three way conversation so no one was left out. I have always encouraged my wife to express what she liked and wanted. The conversation got very heated with all parties contributing to the conversation. My wife talked about sucking him and having me watch before I could participate and also asked him to come to our area to meet and see where things go with no expectations.

I have urged her to do this and now that it is becoming real I am very nervous about the situation. My concerns are:

This guy is about an inch larger than me and thicker. Will she want him more than me after she experiences his cock?

Will she be thinking about him while we have sex after she has him?

I want her to enjoy the experience. I am the one to pursue this. Why am I so apprehensive now?

Marriage is about partnership. Part of that partnership in the LS is finding joy in the partner's pleasure. There are all sorts of variations in LS couples but one constant we observe is that solid marriages are not threatened by play. There will always be someone with different physical attributes. Bigger thicker tighter bouncier younger stronger etc. What matters is how you feel and relate to each other. Put differently, the fantasy that is realized in the lifestyle is not the fact that there is play with others. That's a byproduct. The fantasy that is realized is that one's marriage is not dependent on a set of restrictive behaviors but rather on celebrating each other on so many levels in so many ways.

When we started, we met a woman who had the nicest breasts...bigger than Ms. Golds, just amazing. Once I saw those breasts (I'm a breast man), I instantly decided to leave Ms. Gold because the other woman's breasts were just what I wanted...

Size doesn't matter. Easy to say, hard to accept but it is true. We're not together because we are looking for the next replacement. We are together because we love and trust each other. A bigger cock or nicer tits won't replace the connection that we have. If you are not CERTAIN of the same, then you have work to do to try and get to this place. Good luck and keep working until you are there.

I will say this. I certainly hope my wife gets more pleasure from her playmate than she does me. If she wants a bigger cock then I hope he has one. If she wants a smaller one I hope he has one. Whatever she wants is what I want for her. If she didn't get the physical attributes and physical pleasure that was better than me why would we be in the LS? Better can only be defined by her. I can be a great lover but I can't change the size I am so I will not worry about it. I will only worry about those things I can change.

There is a great story on Literotica about this subject. I have some problems with some of the actions but overall I think the reasons, respect, and love are all there. See "Home Invasion" by LynnGKS. It is sort of a cuckold story but if you read through that you see the truly loving caring wife and husband relationship.