Jump to content
Friskthis

Reactions when things don't go as planned

Recommended Posts

What different reactions have you gotten from you partner when things don't do as planned. Or as they change the plans and then expect you to read the signs.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post

I've seen it happen a lot of different ways. I've seen arguments, abrupt departure, subtle communications, tantrums.

 

It helps when both people are on the same page and have given consideration to what to do if things aren't working out in the moment. Discussing an exit plan before play is important. Considering the feelings of the other participants is important.

 

Are you asking because you've had a recent reaction that is unsettling?

Share this post


Link to post

We've only gotten into a situation that just wasn't working one time. It was a same room play type situation at a club, and once things were well underway but short of actual intercourse, it just wasn't working for her with the other guy. Instead of just calling an abrupt halt to everything, she diverted things by calling my name and saying she wanted me to put it in her. I didn't question that since I knew if she was saying that, then she had her reasons and so everyone just kind of switched back to their own partner without too much awkwardness. After we all got finished and were back out in the common area of the club, there wasn't any drama but the other guy did ask me what had happened. I just said that she just wasn't feeling 100% and wanted to finish with me. I didn't define what "feeling 100%" meant, whether it was physically or just comfortableness with the situation in general. I gently reminded him we all had some hot soft swap foreplay before it got that point, and in the end, all had some good sex, so it's all good. He agreed with that, but they did leave soon after even though it wasn't all that late yet. Hard telling though, they had mentioned earlier their kids were with a sitter, and since they had played, might of just decided to call it a night regardless.

Share this post


Link to post
What different reactions have you gotten from you partner when things don't do as planned.
I believe I have something to say that can help. But first, clarify something for me. When you used the word "partner", were you speaking of your life's partner (your spouse or significant-other), or were you speaking of 'the sex partner', as in the person with whom you just became intimate or whose pants you were trying to get into?

Share this post


Link to post

There is that point of no return. You can always bail at anytime, of course, but after that "point of no return" you can expect things to be unpleasant.

Share this post


Link to post
There is that point of no return. You can always bail at anytime, of course, but after that "point of no return" you can expect things to be unpleasant.

 

Ehh...had a couple bail on us while I was having sex with her. Also 'bailed' on a girl that I was just not into. I think it was more unpleasant for them than for us. About as awkward as asking a couple if they are interested in playing, and how do they like to play? Not really a successful evening though.

 

Thanks this did bring up the idea for my wife and my self that if it's not working we just have to really get the other's attention and call it as it is.

Share this post


Link to post

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • Similar Content

    • By jjtrindc
      It's Monday so I thought we all could use a fun post to kick off the week. I just read a thread about "indicators or signs" about how you can identify yourself as a swinger which reminded me of a fun podcast I heard where they listed off all the ways you may be able to tell if your neighbor, co-worker, etc is a swinger.
       
      So I'll kick it off...
       
      If you see your neighbor's wife headed out the door in a trenchcoat on a Saturday night...in August...well, they just may be swingers.
    • Guest jef
      By Guest jef
      I and my wife have come across a few couples, who we were not sure were swingers are not and we found it very difficult to break ice
       
      I have always wondered why no one has ever thought of a few secret signals that could convey the message, signals like that of the Masonic Lodge, which are understood only by swingers. These could be simple signals which only swingers understand. This will make things easier for both parties. Signals could be such If not understood by the other couple could simply be ignored without making anything obvious. These could be universal and could be propagated by all swinger websites
    • By newbicuriouscpl
      I'm wondering if we're out socially, if there are subtle ways to tell if someone is a swinger; or if there are subtle ways we can bring up swinging without actually saying, "We are curious about swinging." That could really spread something we wouldn't be comfortable with in our area.
    • By 2chase3
      I have heard before there are key points to look for to notice Hotwives/Swinging couples in public. I consider it a myth more than anything, So I will ask the more experienced here if there is any truth in it.
      Its rumored you can usually spot a hotwife from the color of nail polish, jewelery,ankle braclelets, preference in shoe style are all indications of a Alternative lifestyle. *I know to categorize a individual from just these simple choices is a stretch to say in the least.*
      But say we entertain the thought for a moment, any idea's how to spot signs on the male as well?
       
      Like anything most hobbies/activities have a simple sign to show interest in it.
      example: parents with kids in sports might have the football logo or whatever on their vehicle..Sure we have all seen them. Is there a global logo for swinging?lol and do you wear it publicly for the sole purpose?
    • By Mike6216
      Ok, I'm going to sound like a newby, but that's because I am lol. The wife and I are going on our first cruise in a few days. It's not a "swingers cruise", but I've heard that there are usually tons of swingers on any cruise. My question is, how do we spot them? I know about the pineapple thing, but i also assume that pineapples are a  pretty common thing on a Carribean cruise. We are 3 years deep in the lifestyle but, so far, we only swing with one other couple, so we have zero experience in approaching potential playmates. We are not going on the cruise to actively seek out new playmates, but would like to be ready if the opportunity arises. My questions are:
       
      1. Is there a way to spot swingers and, if so, how?
      2. Once we have determined that a couple are swingers, how do we start the conversation?
      3. Is there a way that we can make ourselves visible to other couples that might be in the same boat as us?
×
×
  • Create New...