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rocketboy

Need help - can't stop thinking about sharing my wife with another man

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Ever since I got married 2 years ago, I can't stop thinking about sharing my wife.

 

She is a very good looking Latin woman (30) and that makes it way more exciting for me to think about sharing.

 

She talks dirty during sex but i have zero clue how to start the process of convincing her.

 

I need help...lol.

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Maybe you have found it already, but there is already great advice here on that subject., check out the content tagged with getting started

 

I can also warmly recommend a book by JustAskJulie that has some great advice about starting the conversation, which I wish had known before I started to communicate with Ms about swinging.

 

Amazon.com: The Swinger Manual eBook: Just Ask Julie: Kindle Store (I'm not affiliated with it, just an enthusiastic reader)

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I might, Rocket Boy, ask a question. Which of these is your situation?

 

1. You have already explained swing to her and she seems unconvinced.

 

2. You have not yet told her of your desire.

 

3 Other (explain).

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Btw. the dirty talk during sex would be a good way to test the water. Share a fantasy with MFM or FMF and see how she reacts. Ask how she would like to experience it in real life. Be sure to have that conversation in a non-sex situation (too). Be sure the idea survives when 'sober', outside the bedroom. Don't assume a fantasy is alsways something she wants to do in real life too.

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Start slow, and stay slow. Just ask her what she thinks about swinging. Even if the answer is not what you hoped, that doesn't mean the communication has to stop right there. Openly and honestly communicating about things that both of you understand are just hypotheticals still has value.

 

There are a lot of steps in between a totally vanilla monogamous sex life and full swap swinger. Maybe she is not interested in doing but is curious enough to want to learn more (show her this website), maybe she is not interested in doing but does think visiting a swing club might be fun but with the understanding up front that nothing will happen. Most people kind of ease into swinging by taking incremental steps -take a step, see how it feels, and if all is good, then take another step.

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Guest Ready2dewit

First off, realize you are not alone, or that this is weird.....I've known more than one or two guys who share your frustration in getting started. There is plenty of advice here and other places to help you start the conversation. As a word of caution, I've known men who have hounded their wives until the wife just shuts down to the whole thing, so be careful and make sure your understanding of her level of interest and her actual level of interest is the same, don't want to get ahead of the curve on this one

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SW_PA_Couple said:
I might, Rocket Boy, ask a question. Which of these is your situation?

 

1. You have already explained swing to her and she seems unconvinced.

 

2. You have not yet told her of your desire.

 

3 Other (explain).

 

during sex i tell her she is a hoe and and last weekend made her say she sucks dicks while I am at work

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rocketboy said:
during sex I tell her she is a hoe and and last weekend made her say she sucks dicks while I am at work

 

That information is not helping me to understand your situation.

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rocketboy said:
during sex I tell her she is a hoe and and last weekend made her say she sucks dicks while I am at work

 

So you do a D/s thing and get her to say she is slutty and wants cock?

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rocketboy said:
during sex i tell her she is a hoe and and last weekend made her say she sucks dicks while I am at work

 

See what happens when you feed the trolls?

 

****just my $.02, probably worth less in today's economy.....

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See what happens when you feed the trolls?

 

****just my $.02, probably worth less in today's economy.....

 

LMAO! Come on MidWestMan, without the trolls to toy with, it gets boring. It's like watching cats fight over the catnip. I say invite them to a club or party. His wife (or whatever she is, if she exists...his status is single male who wants his wife to "party") will be treated like a princess and his attitude will get his ass unceremoniously thrown the fuck out. Wouldn't be the first time a pushy dickhead got his comeuppance when his wife becomes just a little too enthusiastic as she finds out how liberating it is to reclaim her sexuality.

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Today I got her to say that she is a dirty whore and likes to suck cocks.

 

I am not trolling or bs'ing here...I am new all of this...

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If I try really hard, I can make my wife say she really likes cars. I think I would have a really bad time if I took that as a confirmation to go to a car meeting together, looking at my wife that clearly is not enjoying herself.

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In short, and I've said this so many times before. This is about three things: love, trust communication. Let her KNOW you love her and have no plans on ever leaving her. Open up to her so that she will feel comfortable opening up to you (and give her tons of positive support when she does open up so she will feel comfortable opening up even more). The way to get someone to open up is to communicate. TALK, talk and talk some more. Start with your fantasies and ASK her to share hers. Start with role playing and just pretending in the bed room. Then slowly see if she is interested in more. On one hand this is very easy (at least it SOUNDS easy) but most people are terrified to open their souls and deep desires. Also, this takes time... a lot of time and patience. It won't happen overnight...or this week, or this month (depending on how good your relationship is). Still, if this is somewhere you would like to go, you can at least start and hope that some day you get there. Keep in mind it may never happen and don't emotionally punish her if she isn't interested. Worst thing that can happen is you have improved your love, trust and communication and that is NEVER a bad thing.

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