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  • Review - Flirt Fearlessly: The A to Z Guide to Flirting

    I often find that books geared towards dating (or other things) are also great for those of us who swing. I happened to run across this book at a discounted price for the Kindle, so I snagged it to see if it had any helpful tips that we could apply as swingers. I am happy to report that it did.

    Flirt Fearlessly: The A to Z Guide to Getting Your Flirt On is definitely geared towards the dating crowd, but it had a few gems that make it worth reading for swingers. I'd definitely recommend this to those who have some issues in the area of flirting, whether it's that you feel uncomfortable flirting or just don't quite know when others are flirting with you.

    The main chapters that I would suggest for those looking for some help when it comes to swinging are: "5 Steps to Super Flirt" and "Moving Your Body" (which is about body language - both understanding the messages you are sending with your body and understanding the messages others are sending you). The 5 Steps to Super Flirt are summed up as follows: 1. Smile, 2. Eye Contact, 3. Good Conversation, 4. Body Language, 5. Touch. All of these are important and all of these are things we've seen come up in threads in the forums. This book does break down each one and give you a good quick guide to how to work on them.

    A lot of the book doesn't really apply to our purposes, and honestly, there's a lot that to most of us is going to seem just obvious. For that reason, I can't suggest paying full price for even the Kindle version of the book ($7.69) UNLESS flirting is a serious issue for you. If flirting is a serious issue for you then, YES, buy this book. If it's just something you think you might want to work on a little bit see if you can't find it discounted at some point. Also, if you do read this please keep in mind that this is geared towards dating and not swinging. With that in mind, there are a lot of things that don't apply, like the idea of "giving the wrong impression" or moving things too fast. It's swinging so we may actually want the one-night stand (or at least to hook up that night) that a dater may be trying to avoid in order to establish a LTR. The same goes to much of the advice regarding avoiding being "too sexual" either in person or via texts/ emails/ etc. As with everything, it's important to pick up what's applicable to you and allow the rest to fall to the wayside.
    Comments 6 Comments
    1. Coupleerotic22's Avatar
      Coupleerotic22 -
      Sounds interesting.

      This line in your review "just don't quite know when others are flirting with you," may be enough for me to drop a few dollars on it. I am notoriously bad at missing the flirting queues.
    1. Wornsilver's Avatar
      Wornsilver -
      ITA with Coupleerotic22. I miss the cues, have no idea when a lady is flirting with me, and I guess I come across sometimes as flirting when it is just not intentional. I'm friendly, interested in other people, but when they are interested in me, it just doesn't register.
      Maybe need the book??
    1. Coupleerotic22's Avatar
      Coupleerotic22 -
      That is me too. I am told I am always flirting, even though I don't consider thus, it is just me being me. As a result, sometimes when others are flirting with me it totally goes right by me with notice.

      Numerous times my wife has said she was totally into you and flirting, and I was just oblivious to it.
    1. exploringRM's Avatar
      exploringRM -
      I purchased the book.it was just ok. I don't think I got much out of it..most of it seemed common sense.

      Sent from my SCH-I535 using Tapatalk 2
    1. Chicup's Avatar
      Chicup -
      My wife was once told at a vanilla party we were at, "Doesn't it bother you that your husband is flirting with all the women?"

      We both found this funny because neither of us, saw it as flirting. I suppose thats the difference between swinger and vanilla in mindset.
    1. Sensualbicouple's Avatar
      Sensualbicouple -
      I'd like to think I can flirt well enough as well as pick up the signs of a man flirting with me, but I just can't pick up the signs of a girl flirting with me unless she was to tell me outright. Is there a section on how girls flirt with other girls? He he ;-)
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