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missohio

Larger labia and scar

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Hi, all. I'm pretty new here. My husband and I are only in discussions about this lifestyle.

 

Here's my biggest hangup and something I think about a lot in regard to swinging...

 

So, I'm not perfect (of course no one is). I've had kids, so there are things that have changed. But I'm an attractive female in her 30s, size 4 dress, pretty fit but somewhat curvy, too - I have a nice figure. I'm mostly confident in my body. I guess my concern is once the clothes come off. Everything else is fine....but I've always had "larger" inner labia. What they refer to as "beef flaps." It was one of my biggest insecurities as a younger woman. I don't have one of those vulvas where the inner labia aren't visible at all when standing. They protrude and always have. Men I've been with have never said anything (except one when I was 18 - made me feel like shit, but I chalk it up to him being young and immature). My husband adores my body and loves giving me oral sex. So I suppose this isn't something I've worried about for a long time because before considering this lifestyle, I never thought anyone else would see that part of my body! I guess I'm just wondering how big of a deal this is to most people? I know everyone is different and there are plenty of women like me, but do some men really have a preference for smaller or larger labia? If someone finds me very attractive and then we end up naked, could that be a major turn off? I can't get my insecurity about it out of my head.

 

Another question but something I'm not really as concerned about - I've had two c-sections so I have a light scar. Would that be bothersome to some men? I'm just thinking about sexy time and then there's always that visible reminder to people that I've had kids. :lol::lol:

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Could it be a turn off? Possibly, to a small percentage of the people you may meet. For me it would be a turn on and I suspect I'm not alone in that. As to the scar, I honestly can't see it being a problem to anyone.

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As women we tend to focus on what we don’t like about our bodies. I remember a female friend and I discussing what we each saw when looking at Playboy. She saw large breasts, I saw flat tummies- what we each desired different in our own body. I am at the point that if that’s what someone else is focusing on then they aren’t for me. More important is that you are enjoying yourselves. Please don’t waste your energy on insecurity.

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tldr; You're perfect, don't worry about it.

 

Now, I'm a man, and I don't pretend to understand the concerns that many women have with their body image. But I've seen it many a time, and often I think it's unwarranted; and probably, in your case, you have absolutely nothing to worry about.

 

I've swing for decades and have been with way more than my share of women. I loved looking at the area below the belt, finding out what was new, what was different. It was a turn on for me. For other men, I would imagine that they just wouldn't care. Go, have fun, don't make a big deal out of it and you'll find that either nothing will be said, or they'll compliment you. (And if anybody is uncomplimentary, Fuck Them! or not.)

 

Many, many women have scars. If you had to have a perfect body to swing, none of us would be swingers.

 

There. Now go have fun . . .

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For years (and years and years) I never knew that there wasn't anything other than "larger inner labia". It wasn't until much later in life I found out that there were "small" ones. It doesn't really matter, however, since both are beautiful...and just being able to see one is a great gift. Don't waste another minute worrying about this. Same goes for the 'scar'. We all have scars, they just show that you have lived life especially since you call it a 'light scar'. Most scars (the worst scars) are not visible and are found on the inside. Personality is more important than any small self perceived 'flaws', especially ones that you notice more than others. You're beautiful just the way you are.

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The simple fact regrading men is that in most regards, we're simple creatures, we like sleep, food and sex, not generally in that order. We REALLY like sex with new women! So, unless you run into a really weird guy, in our minds, pussy is pussy and we're generally not too fussy about how it looks. Don't worry, if you're attractive, willing and wet, no one is going to notice what you see as an imperfection.

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... I've had two c-sections so I have a light scar. Would that be bothersome to some men? I'm just thinking about sexy time and then there's always that visible reminder to people that I've had kids.

 

If you're self-conscious about the scars, just let your pubic hair grow a little to cover it over.

 

Having had kids is an indication of sexual activity and maturity, like having pubic hair. It's a turn on.

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I've always had "larger" inner labia. What they refer to as "beef flaps." It was one of my biggest insecurities as a younger woman. I don't have one of those vulvas where the inner labia aren't visible at all when standing. They protrude and always have.

 

I'm somewhat like you, except that both my inner and outer labia are large, still my inner lips stick out, my clit is big (like a green bean instead of a small pea) and I have small tits. But men and women are always curious to see what it is exactly I have up top, and the people I've had sex with are fascinated by the parts between my legs.

 

I've had two c-sections so I have a light scar. Would that be bothersome to some men? I'm just thinking about sexy time and then there's always that visible reminder to people that I've had kids.
I worried that my two vaginal births messed me up down there, but I've had no complaints.

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You said it. No one is perfect.

 

If I'm to that point with a woman I've likely gotten to know her well enough, even if that's over the course of just an evening, that I'm turned on by her mind, her personality, her body language, her willingness, her confidence, etc that I'm going to be turned on even more by getting to her labia regardless of what they look like.

 

Let put this another way. Do you think an average penis size or some small love handles will make a difference to you if it comes packaged in an otherwise attractive man who has been suave, charming and confident enough to seduce you to the point that you want to have sex with him?

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