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Durgan1712

Attractiveness or beauty if you like.

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Having read many stories on swinging sites, there has seldom been any mention of the physical beauty of those involved.

 

Are anybody, who will have sex with various people, usually acceptable for all concerned in spite of physical appearance?

 

Or conversely are all swingers attractive? Curious.

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All women are beautiful, it just takes a man a little more time to realize it about some women.

 

My wife and I swung, if the woman had physical attraction I was immediately drawn to her. But often I came to enjoy the 'average' woman just as much or more. Personality is the key.

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In my short swinging life the people we have been with are a cross section or just people we know. When I was friends with them in school I would say some were more attractive than others. I thought of some as good looking. I am thin, wider hips and small bust. I have a pointy nose and pointy chin. I have a flat butt. I know it’s strange but naked I don’t like myself. Since playing with other girls I don’t like my down there. I don’t like sloppy people. I don’t seek out partners. I am usually pulled into playing. If a guy I don’t find attractive approaches me I can’t say I have ever said no, I just don’t get enthusiastic.

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I find beauty in many faces and bodies. I love women of all shapes and sizes and colors. A woman who is horny and wants it is hard for me to ignore.

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All people are beautiful. I have had a lot of amazing partners that have always been extremely attractive. Since I am bisexual I have a lot of friends who are both women and men. A lot of them are also very open with their sexuality and we have attended numerous parties together. We have formed and amazing bond through all these years so when one of my female friends decided that she was not feeling herself in her own body and wanted to become transgender we have been very supportive. We talked with her and helped her mentally and financially. We found an clinic not far from her home town that did these types of surgeries that she required. I was honestly surprised that so many clinic did it actually but she ended up using the services of a smaller clinic. They did her FTM top surgery Bellevue being an amazing spot for people who want to go ahead and start the process. They have been very sweet and helpful. Honestly she loved it. Or should I say he loved it. He finished all the procedures by now and we are still amazing friends. 

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On 4/25/2018 at 7:12 AM, PSULioness said:

In my short swinging life the people we have been with are a cross section or just people we know. When I was friends with them in school I would say some were more attractive than others. I thought of some as good looking. I am thin, wider hips and small bust. I have a pointy nose and pointy chin. I have a flat butt. I know it’s strange but naked I don’t like myself. Since playing with other girls I don’t like my down there. I don’t like sloppy people. I don’t seek out partners. I am usually pulled into playing. If a guy I don’t find attractive approaches me I can’t say I have ever said no, I just don’t get enthusiastic.

You sound very good.  

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On 4/25/2018 at 10:12 AM, PSULioness said:

In my short swinging life the people we have been with are a cross section or just people we know. When I was friends with them in school I would say some were more attractive than others. I thought of some as good looking. I am thin, wider hips and small bust. I have a pointy nose and pointy chin. I have a flat butt. I know it’s strange but naked I don’t like myself. Since playing with other girls I don’t like my down there. I don’t like sloppy people. I don’t seek out partners. I am usually pulled into playing. If a guy I don’t find attractive approaches me I can’t say I have ever said no, I just don’t get enthusiastic.

Normally I don't quote things from this far in the past, but PSULioness I know you're currently active.

 

I remember in high school there was a classmate of mine "Sarah". Sarah was incredible. Truly incredible. She was beautiful, talented, intelligent... I had the privilege of being a stand partner with her in band for a year. I was dating someone else in band, so I never made any attempt to date her...not that she was 'in my league'. I got to know her pretty well, and she was just an amazing person in general.

 

One day after school, I was heading to my locker after a club meeting. The school was mostly empty...it was more than an hour since school had let out. As I turned down the hallway for my locker, I could hear Sarah talking with someone in a classroom. I couldn't make out the other person's voice, but I knew Sarah's voice perfectly well. She was complaining to this other person that her breasts were too small. I was dumbfounded. Here was this amazingly perfect young lady whom I know every guy in the school thought was incredible...and she was able to find fault with herself and focus on that fault, to the exclusion of everything else (not that it was a fault in the first place!).

 

PSULioness, as with many people, you appear to be your own worst critic. The thing is; none of us get to decide if we're attractive or not. All we can do is put forth our best foot. The rest is for other people to decide.

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Beauty is only skin deep, there is a whole lot more people, getting intimate can be illuminating, especially over time.

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10 hours ago, bbarnsworth said:

PSULioness, as with many people, you appear to be your own worst critic. The thing is; none of us get to decide if we're attractive or not. All we can do is put forth our best foot. The rest is for other people to decide.

You are 1000% correct. The beauty of this forum is I can share my deepest thoughts anonymously. Sometimes it’s just stream of thought. Yes I am my worse critic, my ideas of beauty are always change. I do compare myself against others who I consider beautiful. Strange thing is that since I have joined this forum my ideas of other’s beauty has changed. My husband has always said my breasts are perfect, and then we would see a bigger breasted friend and he would say wow. So many think women with big breasts have that wow factor. I then hear anything over a handful is a waste. I hear friends complain about being too big, having to always wear a bra, backaches and then I feel better that I don’t have those problems. I have friends who have big butts and I say to myself, yeah you shouldn’t wear what you are wearing. That doesn’t mean I don’t wish my butt had a little more roundness. Is it strange that I have admired a well shaped bottom in men and women even though not in a sexual way. 

If you read my posts you know I am self conscious about myself. I have written about my genitals, something I have only shared with my husband, I prefer a friend with a larger clitoris, as he does too. I prefer smaller breasts or as he says says, itty bitty titties. 

I know I may sound superficial, I do find myself attracted to a certain type before getting to know them. Once getting to know a person many many many times my thoughts change. I know deep down I shouldn’t judge in looks. For myself I sure am happy others don’t just judge on looks LOL. Am I self deprecating? Yes!  

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What is 'attractive' and 'unattractive' about people tends to change as you mature.  When we were young swingers we only played with the other young hotties at the clubs but soon realized it gave us a narrow view of the landscape.  today we are more attracted to humor, confidence, poise, wit and a nice smile.  People who, regardless of their appearance, are comfortable in their own skin are attractive to us.

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We once had a play session with a very attractive and somewhat younger couple.
 

My wife is very pretty and fit and draws a lot of attention. I am a little heavier, a little older looking and sometimes quiet. My charms are elusive, but I am intelligent and a bit witty. I also am multiple seminar trained in oral technique, but that usually isn’t known till later. 
 

The woman of the couple told me that she was really attracted to my intelligence. I know she was in the medical field and I suspect that she was a doctor. Maybe she was blowing smoke my way, but that was my favorite compliment in the lifestyle. 

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On 4/24/2018 at 8:37 PM, Durgan1712 said:

Having read many stories on swinging sites, there has seldom been any mention of the physical beauty of those involved.

 

Are anybody, who will have sex with various people, usually acceptable for all concerned in spite of physical appearance?

 

Or conversely are all swingers attractive? Curious.

Looks counts, if that's what you're asking.

 

Of course it does -- this sex for sport -- there's no other deep-seated, spiritual or intellectual meaning here. 

 

Skin-deep and shallow, let's rock.  I'm more concerned with her looks and sexual talents than the doctoral dissertation she wrote for her PhD. in Philosophy.

 

image.png.889d02b54c90196d95aba04e1b6c0255.png

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27 minutes ago, Sunday said:

Looks counts, if that's what you're asking.

 

Of course it does -- this sex for sport -- there's no other deep-seated, spiritual or intellectual meaning here. 

 

Skin-deep and shallow, let's rock.  I'm more concerned with her looks and sexual talents than the doctoral dissertation she wrote for her PhD. in Philosophy.

 

image.png.889d02b54c90196d95aba04e1b6c0255.png

Is that your wife? That is what I meant by not having a flat butt. 

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On 4/25/2018 at 5:13 AM, adamgunn said:

if the woman had physical attraction I was immediately drawn to her. But often I came to enjoy the 'average' woman just as much or more. Personality is the key.

I agree, now that we play within a closed group of couples and we have emotional connections.

 

But when we were open swingers, my wife and I had a threshold for physical beauty and personality, however, after deciding to swap with the couple sexual compatibility and performance was the key factor whether we played with them again. 

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When we first started looking to have someone join us we only answered what we thought was attractive. Finding a real woman was hard enough without putting the additional prerequisite of being attractive to both of us. We accepted that we had to expand our search to couples, attractive couples. It was about six years ago we found an attractive couple online and we were amazed they showed up. The big negative was he was a jerk. 

Over the years we have met other couples, most not as attractive physically, attractive in many other ways. And even though we have changed who we will meet we have maintained a certain look we desire. We do talk about the type of look we want, not the shape. We have met overweight, skinny, different races, ages and we enjoy the variety. The type is only a guess without meeting, it’s intuitive. 

 

On 11/9/2020 at 10:05 AM, PSULioness said:

You are 1000% correct. The beauty of this forum is I can share my deepest thoughts anonymously. Sometimes it’s just stream of thought. Yes I am my worse critic, my ideas of beauty are always change. I do compare myself against others who I consider beautiful.

PSU you are a beautiful intelligent young lady.  With just your own description of your physical attributes you fit our physical wants. We have been read many of your posts, small breasts are not a negative. You have stated you are unhappy with a large clit. I wonder why a man with a large penis is considered a trophy and a woman with a large clit is unwelcome. Alan and I have met many women looking for a first time same sex encounter. Every woman we have met have been insecure whether they are attractive or not. The size of a clitoris is never an issue for any of these women. Oral sex is the main focus of new meetings and as you have to know so much of your excitement stems from stimulating that single feature. I happen to think a larger clit is a benefit and I find it attractive. 

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