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  1. #1

    Default Handicaps, nerves and excitement

    I've already posted that Friday will be my first time at a swingers club. My boyfriend has been before...while in a previous relationship. I'm nervous and excited but this post is about his handicap.

    He was born missing his left arm from the elbow down. He is amazingly comfortable in his skin. He's attrative, funny and engaging. People, in everyday life, are just drawn to him. I'm sure if he had bad experiences before, he wouldn't want to go Friday and yet I'm a little reserved for him.

  2. #2

    Default Re: Handicaps, nerves and excitement

    I'm sure you've seen the reaction you sometimes get just walking down the street in the vanilla world. Some people recoil, some are too solicitous, some are just easy with it. You'll get the same reactions in the swing club.

    You describe him as "attractive, funny and engaging." Hopefully, he'll be that way at the swing club and some people will react to that and not to his 'handicap.' Go, enjoy yourself, let whatever happens happen. You'll be fine.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Handicaps, nerves and excitement

    One of the truisms in swinging is swingers are just an assortment of regular people just like you'd see while out shopping or whatever. So, adamgunn is right, you'll get the same responses you do anywhere else. Personality is always way more important than looks, so that is what is going to count, and it sounds like he has that covered
    Not all those who wander are lost

  4. #4

    Default Re: Handicaps, nerves and excitement

    Have you ever noticed how, when you're attracted to someone, you're a lot more open to their physical differences. For instance you could see someone you're not attracted to with a mole on their face and mentally recoil, but you see it on Cindy Crawford and suddenly that exact same mole is sexy? Well this is the same thing, if someone is attracted to your husband his disability is going to be a complete non issue, and anyone who thinks it's an issue probably wouldn't have been attracted to him anyway.

  5. #5

    Default Re: Handicaps, nerves and excitement

    Everyone has something wrong, a scar, something missing, a weight problem. Hopefully, your boyfriend's personality will shine through.

    Keep in mind the most attractive people in the world could go to a swing club and just not meet anyone to play with. Keep expectations low, be open minded and come back with a full report!

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