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louieone

Bi guys - hot or not?

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My girl and I are both bi. Now I am really into women, and would take woman any day over a guy, but I do like guys--well, cocks actually. My first actual sexual encounter was with my best friend when I was 12 & 13 and we were just discovering sex. We'd steal nude girlie mags and whack off together, which progressed to each of us taking turns playing the girl as we lubed up and pumped between each other's legs and ass. No actual penetration. Then we heard about blow jobs so we tried it out on each other. This lasted for about a year until we read an article on homosexuality. We were appalled. Neither one of us wanted to be queer, so that stopped.

 

Fast forward a dozen years and I was married, in grad school in NYC and my wife and I became close friends with a gay guy-very nice looking, classy, with money and great sense of humor. My wife was a natural fag hag, and they became close friends. About a year into the friendship, she took off one weekend and left us to fend for ourselves. We had a bottle of scotch and wound up blowing each other. That started a relationship that lasted for almost a year until he got a real boyfriend, who got jealous and turned me in to my wife. I don't know why, but she didn't leave me. In any case, that was my first adult bi experience, and I was liking it, but again it stopped.

 

About 6 years ago, mired in a sexless marriage, and getting internet savvy, I started hooking up with other a few net tramps (tramp being a good word :) and bi guys. I was amazed at how many bi guys there were. Finally, out of the marriage. I was introduced to my current girl. She had been into the lifestyle with her husband. She was bi. As the relationship progressed, I confessed that I was bi, too. She was curious how that would go and suggested a 3 way with another bi guy. I loved the idea and set it up. Since then, we've invited numerous bi guys to join us. She digs having two men take care of her and apparently gets turned on by the guys playing and blowing each other.

 

So after this very lengthy introduction, I'm wondering how many couples like us are out there? How women feel about men doing each other and how many guys have done bi or are curious, and just general reactions to what I've written. There seems to be no problem with the girls getting it on, and I'm wondering if there really is no problem with the boys getting it on also?

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There seems to be no problem with the girls getting it on, and I'm wondering if there really is no problem with the boys getting it on also?
I, Mrs. O, have zero problem with either sex exploring each other. As long as all sexual acts take place between consenting adults, I find the thought of it highly erotic. While I wouldn't participate in some activities that other enjoy, I don't frown upon those that enjoy it, yet still find it so cool that others are 'allowed' to. (for lack of better words) And isn't that what it's all about? :)

 

I also believe that society as a whole, is becoming more open to the concept of 'equal' rights, be it the goose or the gander. ;)

 

Excellent topic. :)

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While we have no problem with people doing anything they want as long as all agree, neither my wife or I are in the least bit interested in bi activity either FF or MM.

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I agree with OhioCouple's philosophy. :)

 

I also think a MFM (with 2 bi guys) would be a major turn-on. It's one of my fantasies. Mr. Vespertine, on the other hand, would NEVER indulge me in it.

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Vespertine said:
I also think a MFM (with 2 bi guys) would be a major turn-on. It's one of my fantasies. Mr. Vespertine, on the other hand, would NEVER indulge me in it.

Dito

 

If this fantasy ever becomes reality for me, it will have to be without Mr LM in the picture.

 

P.S. I loved reading your story about the innocence of youth.

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Fem half here.... I think it is hot... hubby is orally bi. I am not interested in seeing anal penetration between males at all, but watching the oral is very erotic to me. Unfortunately it has been rather difficult for us to find another bi male. It isn't something that is discussed openly. head bang

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I'd say hot; have always wanted to explore while a woman watched and eventually joined in. To me, giving oral looks like so much fun...being in control!!

 

I loved the youth story also. I think back and wish i had a buddy during my early to mid teen years that I could have jacked off with and explored with as well.

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Yeah this totally sounds hot. Unfortunitly stuff like this or finding a bi-male is not easliy done in this area.

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Very nice to read the initial posting.

 

I grew up near Philadelphia, and (believe it or not) had similar pre-teen experiences...

 

Liked all of what you had to said.

 

Have also noted HUGE number of bi-guys on internet, also claiming to suffer from near-to-totally sexless marriages.

 

It's an epidemic, and if you read this week's Newsweek, there's an article about women in today's world that delves into the general "uselessness" that many women feel towards their men.

 

Not to get overly controversial !!!

 

I only wish that I'd met a woman who could openly share everything !!!

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Total turn off for me...Don't want to ever see Male D in the act with another guy. I may change my mind in a few years, this is still all so new to us. :confused:

 

Fem D

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I have seen it on video, some soft play in my years as a teen...I have had a lot of gay guy friends..so what I was around was totally gay...not bi..it does not have much effect on me either way...I see nothing wrong with it or with someone thinking it is hot, just does not push any buttons with me...

 

I have *no* desire to see Mr. Midnight with another man..if it did become something he was interested in..and I seriously doubt that my eyes would most certainly cross..but I would not run screaming down the road...

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My experience started around 13 or so very similar senario.My Bi-ness never re-appeared untill during a very good night of lovemaking I broached the subject with my wife.Looking for telltale signs all I saw was a BIG curiousity,not disgust.Being bi for gals is o.k. why not guys? Now we play with select single bi males,bi or staight couples.Wife really enjoys bi threesums wher everyone shares.

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My partner was always asking about my fantasies ... he's big into fulfilling them for me :-))... and one of mine was being with 2 men. Turns out he was bi, but didn't feel comfortable telling me that until I brought up being with 2 guys. Long story short he had been e-mailing another bi guy and we all decided to get together and it was (and is) fantastic. Not only to I get double the attention some of the time, but I get to watch them as well, which I find extremely HOT. Love it!

 

Of course we were VERY lucky to find the 'right' bi guy who just clicked wonderfully with both of us. I would think that finding a bi guy that clicked with both partners could really be a challenge at times.

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As a bi guy, I guess I'm prejudiced, but I'd hope swingers would find it hot. Very heartening to see so many interested in mixing it up. On the other hand, to those looking for but not finding a bi guy to join them -- Hey! Hello! We're out here! :rollseyes

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Guest Camila17

Well, I have been confused myself for the last year... I will make my story short and I would like to get opinions on this.


I am in love with my boyfriend. Ga-ga in love. He is amazing in every way. He's a metrosexual, and I love it. One time while fantasizing online, I mentioned that 2 guys in an oral scene, is sexy. He asked me if that was a fantasy of mine, I said yes. Months later I was out partying with my a guy friend who is gay and we ended up having a 3some. I initiated it. My friend went down on him and I was so excited from seeing that, then he asked me in my ear, what else would you like to see? and I said "would you go down on him as well? and he said, "ok... for you I will". So it happened. They didn't kiss or anal or hugged or anything. Just oral. It was so hot........but after that I kept thinking... is my guy gay deep inside? have he done this before? I asked him, he said it was his 1st time. But I feel it was not. Maybe the fact that he went down on my friend caught me off guard. I thought we would say no, or hesitate. That gave me doubt.

 

Anyways, we have been together now for a long time, and we never spoke about that night. However, He knows I enjoy the fantasy of 2 guys blowing each other and he knows I enjoy women too. So why I feel safe if I share other women, but so insecure if we bring another guy to the picture? Me enjoying another women doesn't make me gay, so why I'm scared of him being so? It is not equal. I'm I going crazy? I know he enjoyed it and I would really love for us to be open like that and share our fantasies and tendencies TOGETHER... without surprises. I don't judge him, I will accept if that is one of the things he does enjoy but I'm so scared that I will open that door and he would like it so much that I would lose him. Or that he will keep in contact with another guy behind my back. I adore him. And we see each other together for a long time. We have talked about couples hiding their true fantasies and that we want to be different and that we want to keep being the type of couple that can share anything even if it is "weird" for common society.

 

My question is.... why I'm I so scared of letting this (2 guys thing) happen again? I'm scared of opening that door and end up being left out. But I also want him to be open with himself and open enough with me enough to explore life together , without judgements or without us hiding from each other. I know as a fact, that he didn't ask himself "is my girlfriend gay" after we had our one time FMF. So why I'm so scared that he is?

 

Please help me to think straight. I love this man. And our relationship is 100% great. This is my only doubt.

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VERY hot, I have always wanted to see bi males together, or even gay males. My husband, though, is not bi in the least. Well..being that we are pretty young still, I guess I can hope for the best in the future.....a girl can dream can't she?

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Put me down for hot!

 

I was introduced to bi sex by an older male cousin when in early teens. He was showing me his porn stash and we both got hard. One thing led to another and we started to suck each other. When I came in his mouth, wow. We continued for a couple of years plus I was pleasured a couple of times at a movie theater by several grown men.

 

Then I discovered women and didn't look back. That is until my wife lost interest in sex a few years ago after a health problem. I had never forgotten my interest but never pursued any mm activity until I discovered porn on the internet. Suddenly my interest in bi sex was evident as I read and got off on porn sites and bisexual stories.

 

This continued until I met several other married guys with similar interest. I rediscovered how much I enjoyed both sucking and being sucked by another guy. I am not interested in anything but oral. I guess my biggest fantasy now is getting into a mmf with a couple where I can enjoy oral sex with both the male and female and where the female is turned on by watching the guys do oral on each other.

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Me and hubby are both bi, but he won't let me post it all over the internet for some reason. LOL. The hottest thing for me is to see to guys going at it, in every way. I have lots of fantasies about being done by alot of guys, and them going at it all around me as well. Still waiting for a safe situation for this to happen in tho. When I first learned hubby was bi and had had bi sex, I was morbidly facinated, and it took me awhile for it to REALLY start turning me on, but the more I thought about it, the hotter it became. During sex sometimes he will suck on my tongue as if he's going down on a guy, and we both come like crazy. It is hot.

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Camila17 said:
I asked him, he said it was his 1st time. But i feel it was not. Maybe the fact that he went down on my friend caught me off guard. I thought we would say no, or hesitate. That gave me doubt.

 

Maybe this is the root of your issue??? If you doubt his sincerity, you will likely feel insecure about it.

 

I can tell you that N (the Mrs.) had a fantasy about it, and frankly I was curious myself, so I tried it. I just jumped in and gave it my all, which might lead one would think I had tried it before. Although it was my first and last try, I had seen and received enough BJ’s to have the basic idea. So, maybe he is being truthful about never having done it before…at this point, only he knows. If he has a track record of openness and honesty, his willingness and/or enthusiasm probably isn’t the best gauge or his truthfulness.

 

To the original poster- I’ll ask N to post her opinion on Bi guys.

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Camila17 said:
It was so hot........but after that I kept thinking... is my guy gay deep inside? Me enjoying another women doesn't make me gay, so why I'm scared of him being so? I'm so scared that I will open that door and he would like it so much that i would lose him. Or that he will keep in contact with another guy behind my back.

 

OK, take a deep breath. :)

 

Let me ask you a question...

 

Up until recently, you thought he was entirely heterosexual, right? If so, then why weren't you worried that he would run off with some girl? He likes girls. You know he likes girls. So why wouldn't you be worried that he would leave you for another girl?

 

When I say it this way, does it make it clearer that trust in your relationship is just as important for bi experiences as it is for hetero ones?

 

Compare the two situations, and think about how there is no difference whatsoever between him liking girls or him liking guys. Just because he may be attracted to both doesn't mean he wants to cheat on you, leave you, or run away with someone else (male or female)

 

Since you obviously trust that he's not running off with another woman, why are you worried he might run off with a guy?

 

Now, having said that, there is a huge difference between being attracted, physically, to someone of the same gender, vs being willing to have a relationship with someone of the same gender. Many people don't get the difference, so I'd like to hep if I can.

 

When I was a teenager, I thought I was "just curious" about having sex with other girls. In my mind, all we were doing with each other was experimenting, and we certainly weren't lesbians.

 

Then, in my early 20's, I started to realize I was just as equally attracted to females as I was males, but I still didn't want to believe I was "bisexual", because I could not have imagined actually having a girlfriend, a woman I would want a full time relationship with.

 

Then, in my early 30's, I met and fell for a woman. We were, in every sense, girlfriends.

 

So, I had to throw away my silly labels and realize I wasn't just "flexible" about who I could sleep with...I was a full fledged bisexual woman, and I was ok with that.

 

Then, wonder of wonders, I met and married my soul mate...a man who is also bisexual, so he understands me far better than most people ever could. He's also open to swinging, so our lives could not be more enhanced than they are.

 

My guess is that both you and your boyfriend are "flexible" bisexuals, meaning...although you will be pleased to play with people of the same gender, neither of you desire a relationship with people of the same gender.

 

But even if you did...even if you were both full-fledged bisexuals...you are in love with each other. You have chosen to love each other at the exclusion of all others, male or female. If you wouldn't cheat on him with a man, why would you cheat on him with a woman? Similarly, since he chose you, at the exclusion of other women, there is no reason to think he would dismiss you for another man.

 

He loves you. Don't worry about labels. Enjoy the experiences together, and at the end of the day, know you have a lover who wants to please you so much he's willing to experiment with new situations to see you enjoy yourself. :)

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Jane and John put it very well- just enjoy the experiences. I've had fantasies off and on that involve guys with each other and found it pretty interesting to actually get to see T suck another man's cock. We communicate about things pretty well (we think) and so I haven't gotten any insecurities about if he might be tempted away by something better.

 

What I found interesting was that it wasn't the thought of T with another man, more about two men I didn't know and watching them. That we still have yet to explore and figure we have lots of time.

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So after this very lengthy introduction, I'm wondering how many couples like us are out there? How women feel about men doing each other and how many guys have done bi or are curious, and just general reactions to what I've written. There seems to be no problem with the girls getting it on, and I'm wondering if there really is no problem with the boys getting it on also?

 

First, I wanted to say your story was very open and touching. You're so honest!

 

Answer: I'm a bi female. I think of myself more as a man-crazy heterosexual who likes to play with girls once in a while. facelick My husband is uber-straight. (He's comfortable & accepting of gay & bi people, though.) We enjoy MFMF, MFFM, FMF, FFM, and MFM. He's 100% happy with all of that, but would not go at all for MMF. If he would, I would!

 

The idea of just oral or handjobs between bi men, especially masculine types like my hubby, is a turn-on. I fantasize about it, but apparently it will have to stay in my fantasy life!

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I think a lot of guys think about it but think most women don't like it. I had a few pre teen experimentation but never with a woman there, would love to find that couple to talk about it with but then again how do you bring it up.

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I only read the first post, where the writer mentioned that he had a homosexual relationship at age 12 & 13.

 

I had the same experience. The two of us, would go look at a batch of girlie calendars in this Advertising Exec's storage bins. He had them custom made in his garage.

 

And then we would go and play with each other. We would suck, butt fuck, anything at all. But neither of us ever had a climax.

 

But that kind of activity has it's costs. You begin to think you are gay, and it took me more than twenty years and five years of analysis to understand that this type of sexual activity was not uncommon for boys that age.

 

It was not until I went to New York City in my mid thirties and tried a gay baths, that I decided once and for all that I wan heterosexual, and that any male contact was rare and incidental.

 

For what it is worth, I think the psychiatric conclusion is that we are all bi sexual, more or less.

 

But for me, those experiments at age 12 - 13 were very damaging, and I wish I had not had them.

 

Otto

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not hot...

 

Women from day one are the goddess models and were created to be the center of attention... that is why when two women are in the room

sexually there is often drama.

 

Two guys is just missing the point.. there is nothing they can do that a woman can't do... it's just female rejection issue trying to find a home.

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neoparadigm said:
Two guys is just missing the point.. there is nothing they can do that a woman can't do... it's just female rejection issue trying to find a home

 

And two women together isn't missing the point, then? Is there nothing they can do that a man can't do? I'm not really catching what you're trying to say here. From what I read it is "bi-women are hot, but bi-men is just missing the point".

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WesternSwing said:
And two women together isn't missing the point, then? Is there nothing they can do that a man can't do? I'm not really catching what you're trying to say here. From what I read it is "bi-women are hot, but bi-men is just missing the point".

 

These are our thoughts as well; there is no difference between two men playing with each other than two women doing the same. It’s always interesting to hear how others differentiate the two. They are the same act. Neither does anything for us but we call it as we see it and if it quacks like a duck it must be a duck!

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Bret4u2 said:
Put me down for hot!

I was introduced to bisex by an older male cousin when in early teens. He was showing me his porn stash and we both got hard. One thing led to another and we started to suck each other. When I came in his mouth, wow. We continued for a couple of years plus I was pleasured a couple of times at a movie theater by several grown men.

 

I don't regret my sexual exploration at age 13. It taught me that I could enjoy sex with anyone, regardless of their gender. My experience continued with several other boys and several older men for several years with oral sex. However when I was about 17, I was introduced to oral sex with a married woman. From then on I knew I preferred eating pussy. I just put it out of my mind and although I had many chances of enjoying sex with other guys including one chance at a mmf with a stripper my army buddy and I picked up in Lawton, Okla. She wanted both of us at the same time to fuck her but I just didn't feel comfortable at the time. My buddy wanted me to try it and I always suspected he was bi. My regret now is I didn't go for it.

 

Having oral sex with a couple now is my greatest fantasy and love to see others either enjoy it or want to. I have never been attracted to men and continued to be attracted to women but I would gladly suck a nice cut cock to completion or ever better, be licking a wet clit as a cock is plunging in and out of my mouth and a woman's pussy. Yum! Anyone in Ga?

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Jumping back in here on this. Here's the way we feel about the bi issue. And pardon the blunt talk. We (guy speaking) expect our gal to suck cock and we think that seeing her eat another gal is about the hottest thing ever. Why shouldn't the gal feel that seeing her guy with another guy is hot. Of course she does. Mine does.

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These are our thoughts as well; there is no difference between two men playing with each other than two women doing the same. It’s always interesting to hear how others differentiate the two. They are the same act. Neither does anything for us but we call it as we see it and if it quacks like a duck it must be a duck!

 

I've been too bored at work lately too much time to post :)

 

Anyways when I look at sex from a biological standpoint, I think female bisexuality IS different than male bisexuality. Motivations are different, and while the research is controversial (in large part because the gay community doesn't like it) there is some proof that while most female bisexuals STAY bisexual, most male bisexuals will eventually migrate to hetro or homosexual over time.

 

To me this makes sense from an evolutionary biology stand point, and while its PC to say 'its the same thing' its also PC to say that men and women can do everything equally well which is also false.

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I've been too bored at work lately too much time to post :)

 

Anyways when I look at sex from a biological standpoint, I think female bisexuality IS different than male bisexuality. Motivations are different, and while the research is controversial (in large part because the gay community doesn't like it) there is some proof that while most female bisexuals STAY bisexual, most male bisexuals will eventually migrate to hetro or homosexual over time.

 

To me this makes sense from an evolutionary biology stand point, and while its PC to say 'its the same thing' its also PC to say that men and women can do everything equally well which is also false.

 

Chicup, We hope you stay bored at work! :)

 

Several studies have shown that lesbians have heterosexual relations far more often than gay men do. Homesexuality is far more prevalent in men and bisexuality is much more common in women - the studies are glaringly consistent on this fact. To use the analogy of a television remote control - men are programmed with an on/off button, whereas women have volume controls.

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Susan here--I know this is hypocritical because in a group scene I can be all over another girl like sand at the beach, I just can't watch two men go at it and if I saw them playing rump ranger (not that there's anything wrong with that) I'd just have to seal myself into a rocket and launch myself. Then again, maybe I just don't want the competition :)

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Thanks for the story! Never been in the bi situation myself (mm), but sometimes feel while reading post on here, people who claim to be "swingers" set so many rules, how can one enjoy sex if you need a book to keep track of all the rules........The last couple we played with before anything started asked "so you guys have any ground rules"...... I'm very impressed they asked, it was the polite and respectful thing to do, but we both said....no not really...were both prety smart adults we know what were comfortable with, trust each other to do what they are comfortable with. We did state our preference to use condoms, but hey thats all we could come up with for "rules"..... Next we hear they have rules...no kissing, no male on male (like we asked for that??), she wants just penetration, no oral, (unless its from a F), the list goes on and on...... by the end I'm like....did you take notes honey? Great they know what they want, I'm sorry but what happened to the idea of being open minded, if you truly have a relationship with trust and you BOTH wish to explore sexualy (defination of a "swinger")....what the problem?

 

In all the times we have had an experience we have never felt preassured to do anything we didn't want to do. If were not comfortable we don't do it. Were all adults do we need all the lables and rules? So what not if another man makes it good for you, and hes ok with it.....I say enjoy!

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Y'know, Mrs. Geek and I are both listed as Bi on SwingLifestyle - and I've often wondered if that scares some people away.

 

We hooked up a while back with another couple where the guy admitted he was bi, but who didn't list that way online for pretty much that exact reason.

 

And I think we all know the real reason why female bi action is considered more openly acceptable among the Lifestyle: It's what the porn industry has taught us.

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So after this very lengthy introduction, I'm wondering how many couples like us are out there? How women feel about men doing each other and how many guys have done bi or are curious, and just general reactions to what I've written. There seems to be no problem with the girls getting it on, and I'm wondering if there really is no problem with the boys getting it on also?

 

Louieone,

I'm a male curious about bisexuality for quite some time but never spoke of it in the past, If I said anything to my wife at the time she would have divorced me. Well, we divorced anyway for other reason and I found a great girl I can really be myself with.

 

She is bisexual and has been encouraging me to act on my curiousities. I'm very interested but still need to work up the courage. See that there's so many more bi men out there definately helps.

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If I found out that my man was bi, I think,I would probably lose all respect for him. I do not believe that a woman can satisfy another woman like a man can. If that is the case, do it yourself.The only thing they can do with each other is rub uglys.You might as well do it yourself. Not only will you get your nut, but you'll get to keep your dignaty.That's for both sexes. So for me, not hot. I would'nt mind watching another couple, but not my man. :eek:

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Bravo JTcamp05 and all those other "Real Open-minded Swingers." ::P:

 

To all the Vanilla Wannabee Play-Actor Swingers lurking here. I'm the surviving widower of a MF swinging couple; trying to re-enter the Lifestyle and find it increasingly VANILLA. We are all old farts; brought up with Victorian ideas who've seemed to have overcome tags. If a guy goes online as Bi, he is ignored or receives unkind replies. I've been told on Chat to quit trying; just go out and hire a woman...get a blowjob. I do not care for impersonal sex. Buying a whore is just not a turn on for me. Nor is getting a blowjob without doing at least a 69. My pleasure derives from giving pleasure to women. But I do love being under a woman when she is enjoying doggy ... licking her clit and labia while he slides in and out and do not mind doing oral on him, when he slips out, then putting him back. I had one couple with whom I did this on a regular basis while at University. I just love an Orgy, where everyone is in a big pile of sweaty extremities, in low light, where no one knows nor cares who is doing what to whom. The sexual energy and tension is too great to care.

 

For all of you quasi-vanilla swingers, who have just begun to experience sexual freedom :nono: I really wouldn't want to play with you...Too many rules, Too claustrophobic and just plain full of unresolved Phobias. You guys love just a "blowjob" or love watching your woman go down on another female or guy, call yourselves swingers, and chat online like a bunch frantic adolescents, posting "cock-shots" or pics just of the lady; I believe you are all just a bunch of voyeurs maintaining the separate standards slowly slipping from the masculine strangle-hold of society.

 

Women have always been more free with one another ... the guys have been the stick-in-the-muds trying to maintain the status quo. I don't want to hire a hooker, nor get a mindless blowjob you all seem to crave more than all other sensations three or more people can enjoy with one another(s). Do you eat her after you've cum inside her...I know many newbies who don't even do that... Surrender

 

Oh, well. Just a veteran swinging opinion of today's groups...Blowing off some steam :o "As The Old Bull said to the Young Bull: Let's NOT run down and fuck a few ... Let's Walk Down and Fuck Them All!" Jeok

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I suppose I don't really fit into any of the profile descriptors. While I'm listed as straight because I'm not really bi-curious per se, a better description for me might be "bi-accepting". The difference between the two is that although I'm not particularly focused on seeking out another guy, I might say yes if the situation presented itself on its own, at least where oral is concerned.

 

I think single-word descriptors are useless except as a means of introducing a more detailed statement about the person, which would then render the descriptor entirely unnecessary. Compounding this problem is the fact that our present cultural predicament gives us only three choices: straight, bi, bi-curious. I think 'bi-accepting' would be a good fourth choice. And there could be others: straight until drunk, male with lesbian tendencies, Ford F-150 straight, chintz gay, diesel gay, ashamed fraternity gay, Catholic priest celibate, Islamic stern-fisted will of God straight, and my personal favorite: Costco weekender three glasses of chardonney peroxide blonde bi-curious.

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I am with DBL D here, where I agree with others that if it is what you like then more power to you. I hope you have a wonderful time. I just really can't see nor do I want to see Dog in a sexual situation with another man.

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