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PotentialSwnger

Swingers in their 20's?

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Hey everyone!

 

I have seen alot of replies, throughout the board, of people stating their age. Most everyone is in their 30's, 40's & 50's (that I've seen).

 

I am 21 and my husband 23... I was just curious to know how many swingers out there are in their 20's? Are swingers in their (early/mid)20's hard to find and are they even desired by other swinger couples in their 30's, 40's, & 50's?

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I'm 27 and I have been coming to this site for years... there definately are not (IMO) that many swingers in their 20s... I could be wrong but from the personal sites that I visit there really aren't that many compaired to the 30s, 40s and 50s out there.. :)

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I recently (well April) turned 30 and my wife is 27... We know 2 other couples in their 20's...

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We're 28 and 23. We run into some of the same things, as far as there being a lot more folks in their 30s than in their 20s. Nice to know they are there, though.

 

BigL

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We are also in our twenties...and so is our playmate....I am sure there are some in their twenties out there for you!

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I am 22 & hubby just turned 30 in June. We have found a lot of couples in their 20s. But to be actually honest, we have connected more with couples in their late 20s & 40s the best. B/c a lot of younger 20 yr olds don't have the life responsibilites we have. So, just b/c someone isn't in their 20s doesn't mean you should overlook them!

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I'm 26 and my hubby is 28, you are right, there are not many swingers in their 20's. We have found more of an older croud as well. That may be a good thing, really. ;) Because we are so new, I think it would be better to start out with others who have worked past all the "newbie" kinks.

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We are 27 and 26 here! But I agree with one of the above posters, we don't have a lot in common with early 20's because usually they don't have kids and the same responsibilities we have....so we just don't have much in common!

 

I think our ideal age range is mid/upper twenties or even very early 30's.

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I am 22 & hubby just turned 30 in June. We have found a lot of couples in their 20s. But to be actually honest, we have connected more with couples in their late 20s & 40s the best. B/c a lot of younger 20 yr olds don't have the life responsibilites we have. So, just b/c someone isn't in their 20s doesn't mean you should overlook them!

 

I didn't intend for people to make the assumption that we would never consider swingers in their 30's, 40's, & 50's. I was just curious to know how many are in their 20's... like us.

 

We, as well, have a better connection ("connection" not meaning swinging, we have yet to do so) with couples older than us due to our additional responsibilities. Which is why I also asked if swingers in their 20's are even desired much by couples in their 30's, 40's, & 50's?

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That seems to be 90% of the responses BigL and I get, is older people attracted to us because we're young and nubile :D . Or, um, something like that :). It's actually hard because we want our first experiences to be with people around our age and since I am only 23, that rules out a lot of people for a while until we're more comfortable.

 

LittleL

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I was just curious to know how many swingers out there are in their 20's? Are swingers in their (early/mid)20's hard to find and are they even desired by other swinger couples in their 30's, 40's, & 50's?

 

We are in our late 30's (me) early 40's (hubby) ... and we've never approached a couple under 30.

 

However, we have been approached by several couples in their mid 20's. We find it flattering. :)

 

We will always talk to them, to see if there's a connection. Sometimes there is, sometimes we find we have nothing at all in common with them ... it varies. Many young couples have been together several years, some since high school. These are the couples that we have gotten along with well. facelick

 

The couples who have not been together very long ... we are more cautious of them. But that caution is present regardless of the age group. Naturally, we just see many more couples who are boyfriend/girlfriend swinging in their 20's than the other ages.

 

If you are attracted to a couple who is more than 10 years older than you, we would recommend you make the initial contact. They may not be actively looking for a young couple, but be very interested when presented with the opportunity. :D If you are a couple who has been together for years, you might want to mention that, as it could set certain "are you sure you're ready to swing?" concerns aside.

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I think you see more swingers in their late 30's and older because they have come to grips with more about their sexuality and are more secure in relationships. I know I am. I think in your 20's you are really still expirimenting. There is a reason that the majority of first marriages fail during the period where the couple is 27 - 33 years old.

 

But that said, we have been with two couples where the wife is 5 - 10 years younger than the husband and is still in her early to mid-30's. I have to agree though, it can be difficult with the kids and younger couples. It makes it hard to coordinate with them. They can pick-up and meet anytime. We have babysitter arrangements to consider.

 

Mr. WS

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Well, I still feel twenty-something! Does that count? :lol:

 

We're really in our mid forties, but we're open to a lot of ages. It depends on the people, not the number of birthdays. ;)

 

-B

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This is kinda hard for me right now. I am in my 20's and this is one of the last times I'll refer to myself like that. I'll be 30 in a couple months. :(

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I am 26 and he's 36, so I'm hoping for the best of both worlds...the younger crowd and an older one as well. I'm single and never married, no kids...but he's got two kids and has been married and divorced, so hopefully it'll be easier for him to relate to people that we talk to and maybe build a better connection with, and I'm hoping to just kinda follow along I think. The friends we're going to our first club party with our in their early thirties and mentioned that they've had no trouble at all meeting and participating with couples, both old and young, at the clubs they go to.

 

In my quest into this lifestyle over the past year or so, I've not noticed a huge difference in age, though I've been strictly threesomes and other females, never been to a full-blown club, so I really don't know what to expect once I'm there. In my lifestyle with the threesomes and female partners, I have been with only people under the age of 30, and I've always had the rule that I'm not with an actual "couple" in my threesomes, always just two other people, so there's no issues between myself and the couple, so the whole swingers thing is going to be VERY new to me, but I'm VERY excited about it. I'd be happy with an older couple so long as there was a connection and an attraction present and I felt comfortable with them.

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We are both 24 and kinda new to everything. We have checked out boards and such but she doesn't like the idea of meeting people that way. We have screwed around with some friends but not any swinging just a little extra hands and such. We are open and interested but one of the problems is the lack of couple/women in their 20's that we know to play with.

 

We would love to meet a bi girl or couple to hang out with, go out to dinner and have fun, then maybe more. If anyone knows good places in Boston to meet other like minded people in their 20's or early 30's let us know.

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OK hubby & I talked about this today. We think the reason why most swingers are in their 30s & u p is basically b/c of life. While he is 30, we are really young in life. I am in school still. He is starting some classes to get a new license. We have 2 young kids who are no where near school age. We are trying to buy a house. So, basically what I am saying couples a little older are already settled in life. Most, not all, have their career set, their kids are older, which means easier to get babysitters or whatever. It seems we almost have no time for swinging right now. We hung out with a couple a few times recently & went to a club once. Boy! On top of everything else with life we are partied out! So, we think that once we are more sttled in life, it will be a little easier.

 

Just my 2 cents!

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we're both 26, but we've been dating for 10 years (since highschool) and plan on getting married next october. while we're not necessarily "settled in" to life or anything, i think that the fact that we've been together so long makes us more interested in the lifestyle. relatively speaking, we have had very little experience outside of our relationship and feel that we're ready to venture out and do some exploring :)

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I'm 22....but in the experiences I've had the couples have been in their early to mid 30's....I really enjoy women in this age bracket for some reason facelick

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Tazzie & I are on the late end of our 20's now, and we have had some difficulties finding people to swing with around our age range, not saying that couples in their young 20's are not good, but we have come across alot of younger couples in their early 20's who were very imature, and extremely pushy. So with us we usually look for couples 25 +. But that's our feelings too.

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We're both 27 (well, I will be in November, he's the old man ::P: ). I get along much better with older women as friends, so I imagine it will be close to the same with swinging. We were married at 21 and had our first kid *ahem* 7 months later, second kid 16 months after THAT, so we're a pretty established family unit with responsibilities and such. It seems as though older (I don't mean old, I just mean the age. Young doesn't = hot in my book) couples are more understanding of responsibilities and childcare wrangling, etc. and would be less likely to pout about plans falling through. I'm sure it's the same with younger couples with similar stuff on the homefront.

 

-Courtney

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We started swinging when we were 23 and the main reason for it was because my partner was bi and wanted a chance to explore her bi side while still in our committed relationship. The swinging scene was a great place for that... the only problem was that it was hard to find young couples. Way too often we'd go to a club and be the only ones under 40! Thank god for the internet... we started a little group for young swingers in our area and it just kept growing and growing. Now, 4 years later, there is a nice sized community of young swinger we play with of all lifestages (kids/no kids, married/dating, and partiers/homebodies). My advice is to all young swingers is to do the same. It makes a world of difference.

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I am 29 and hubby is 30. We have been married for 9 wonderful years. We find we have more in common with late 30 something couples. Maybe it is their security with thier realtionship we find so attractive. facelick

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We are new to the site and we are also in our early 20's....He is 23 and I will be 22 next month. We are more comfortable with the thought of being with people around our own age....but have noticed that alot of the "swingers" are of an older age. We think its great to see such a diverse age group living this lifestyle....but wish we could find more people who are in their early to mid 20's who are just starting out....just for the added comfort. However, we would probably click better with people in a different age bracket because we have been together for 8 years come this April, just bought a house, no children yet...but we definately have our life in order, and our priorities straight. ( no offense to the younger crowd) Most younger people just aren't that settled in to life yet....they don't even know what they want. I agree that alot of times younger people are still in the " i just wanna experiment" stage. Anyhow. Good luck. Hope you find what you are looking for.

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I'm still wishing I could find people closer to me in age as well. Don't get me wrong, i've enjoyed everything to this point but I'd like to be with a young couple and see the differences, if any.

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We are an "older" couple, she in her mid 30's and I, well... a little older. ;) We are both often mistaken for being much younger than we really are. I feel that age is something that you wear well or don't, much like clothes. We think young, act young and are not in a real big hurry to "mature." We are also young in life with young children.

 

When I was in my early 20's I would have cringed at the idea of swinging and thought it was perverted. But after living life fully since then, I feel that swingers are more enlightened than the rest of the general population. Something that would destroy the average couple (sex with others) only makes a swinging couple stronger and more in love. It takes a few years of life to be able to fully grasp such a concept. It also takes deep self confidence, something a lot of younger people have not developed yet. Hence the older crowd generally associated with swinging.

 

We would entertain younger couples because we would not feel self conscious about our looks or bodies. Others may not feel the same way.

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Thats Awesome HotSummers.

 

Very good way of looking at things. I think it's great that you all aren't ready to mature completely, and act young. Of course, I'm in My 20's and sometimes get told I act too mature...soo...lol. My mother is in her early 50's and she acts more my age than I do and I think it is very delightful to see so many people of an older generation, just enjoying life so freely.

 

Just thought I'd say Hey and tell ya that I think you guys sound like a wonderful couple.

 

:kissface: ~ R.

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I'm 29 and the Mrs. is 27. We started a few years ago, and I would say that in our area, the average age of those in the lifestyle skew a little higher, but only into the thirties. All ages are represented around here, though. It's a nice little blue-collar melting pot.

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Well, I can tell you that my ex and I started swinging BEFORE we were in our 20s. We started at age 19. We got married when we were 23 and remained swingers our entire marriage. We still play togetehr occasionally, but she moved several hundred miles away, so not so much any more. The swinging part of our lives was the one thing that stayed great the entire marriage and it had absolutley nothing to do with the split. Oh, by the way, we're both 44 now and still going strong! When we were younger, we partied with all ages of friends and still do!

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I think that while younger couples aren't the majority they are in fact out there - and increasingly so. The reason however is simple why you probably don't find as many young couples. For one if someone practices what is swinging behavior male/female despite our "sexually liberated" generation the stigma of he/she sluts still exist - so many people who are probably interested otherwise, don't feel as comfortable...well maybe except guys cause' they're always horny.

 

However, I think that is changing now - and really the only reason why you tend to see older couples swing is because of : 1) comfort 2) trust and 3) sexual maturity.

 

Younger couples tend to be starting out with eachother, are new to one another and unless they make the concerted effort to express these specific issues tend to not feel comfortable expressing interest until they are older. Sometimes couples wait until they're older to "spice things up" sometimes they wait until they're older because they are growing with their partner and are more comfortable sharing those interest.

 

2) trust same thing. Trust takes a lot of time (especially the trust to allow someone else to play with your partner), and as we all to some degree struggle with our insecurities and jealousy issues - it takes time (years often) for couples to trust one another. Sometimes younger couples perhaps can deal quicker and it doesn't take years necessarily - but it definitely takes some time for them to full on swing, and by then they probably fall in the 30ish+ crowd you mentioned.

 

3) sexual maturity. You'll be quick to find many ready and willing single guys - in our age group because 1) the sexual double standards - but also because guys' sexual desire between the ages of 18-28 is bit more revved (though viagra has tweaked this a bit)than that of women who tend to reach the peak of their sexual desire/response towards their 30s/40s. Some point to the "biological clock" trying to beat menopause, they way belligerent drunks beat fellow patrons on "last call" - but I'm not so sure its just personal comfort moreso than biology since they're are probably PLENTY post-menopausal women who enjoy the lifestyle. But with the social and biological differences in male female sexuality the addage "You can only swing as fast as the slowest partner" may shed a bit more light since swinging usually takes place because the female partner actually is willing to at least try it. Sometimes she may be dragged and kicking, sometimes she does it for her partner, and sometimes she is acknowledging some of her own fantasies - but it really can't take place unless the female partner is comfortable enough with herself. And in their 20s a lot of young women may be comfortable with it themselves - but they may not feel comfortable sharing such with a partner they are unsure will be accepting of their desires - and still respect them as a partner.

 

Now that of course is not to say that women's sexual desire/responses necessarily aren't close to or higher than that of males in the 20ish age group - but the social double standard still exist for them and that can be a major deterrent to what society deems for women as "slutty" behavior.

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hi we are 29 and 28 and started swing last summer.I guess we all do it for the fun and for the variety

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We are 24 and 26 just thinking about joining the lifestyle. We have some of the same concerns about being able to meet couples in our age group. Keep us posted as to how things turn out.

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recently 26 myself (oh...god...business end of 30 is approaching....) and still would like to consider myself quite active, irrespective of the age situations....

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We've had no problem finding plenty of couples in our age group. I'm 28 and Drew's in his thirties, but 2 of the couples we play with are younger than me and all that we play with are within our same generational group.

 

Pepper

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This is a really interesting topic to me, because im in my early 20s. I'm not currently in a relationship with anyone, so obviously Im not actually a swinger, just someone who's become kind of intruiged by the whole idea. Im brand new to this board, by the way. *s*

 

Im surprised that there are so many people in their 20s who are swingers. I posted in my introduction that the guys I've dated so far were very much the jealous type. I could never imagine any of them being swingers. Also, the girl friends I have look at relationships the same way. I dont think I could talk with them about the idea of swinging because they'd think i was VERY strange! Well, I live in a pretty small town and I'm sure people in other places are a little more openminded.

 

My idea was that people probably become much less jealous as they get older. Probably they just relax a little and aren't as insecure. Someone suggested that I post my own question about this and I probably will!

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I Have Been Swinging Since I Was A Teenager, Many Can Not Say That. Sure It Gave Me Some Rather Odd Views, Btu I Had Very Liberal Parents - Who Were Also Swingers - And I Guess I Inheritted The Same Ideals. Again, Dont Get Any Disgusting Thoughts Of Incest Here.

 

Ive Had Several Partners In Mylife, Whether They Be Girlfriends Or Wives, And Being The 20's Couple In A Swing Club Was Like Being Fresh Meat In A Shark Tank. We Also Noticed That Most Swingers Were 35+ And Had A Difficlut Time, Even While Livign In Metro Atlanta, To Find Swingers Our Own Age.

 

We Are In Our Early-mid 30's Now. And Yet It Still Feels Like We Are Fresh Meat In A Shark Tank Whenever We Go To A New Club Or Sign On To A New Swingers Or Personals Website.

 

Since You Seem New To This, Keep In Mind It Is Always Important To See Past The Glitz And Glamour. Be Sure You Are Making The Right Choice When You Decide To Be Invloved In This Lifestyle. Couples Who Are Not As Happy As You Are Seem To Enjoy Creating Conflict Between You And Your S/o.

 

Pleasure Is The One Thing You Can Give Freely To Another, Whether You Expect Something In Return Or Not, That Can Make Them Happy. With So Much Pain In The World Today, Make Someone Else Happy, If Only For A Little While.

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We're 28(m) and 26(f), though I suppose we cannot truly call ourselves

"swingers", given that we are still in the "strongly considering it" phase.

Obviously, being able to be with some people our own age would go a

long way towards helping us with the first steps.

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I am 29 and the Mrs. is 26 we have been swinging for about 3 years now. A lot of the couples me meet or play with are in their mid to late 20's.

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