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TattooNJ

Do you always play with another couple when you go to a club

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How often do you go to a club and not hook up with another couple?

 

Our second visit to a club we had a really good time just playing by ourselves. Does this happen to others often?

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We rarely hook up when we go to the club. We go for the atmosphere and the fun of meeting new people. Now, on occasion, we will have public sex with each other and that is exciting for me:)

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When we first started, we only played together. Now, maybe half the time we play alone publicly and half the time we play with others. They're both pretty hot. ;)

 

We really love the sights and sounds and sometimes that is all we're looking for.

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We've only been to a club 3 times, 2 of those times we played with another couple (or two or three) and the other time we just went to check it out and be together.

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It's probably about half and half for us. Sometimes we just don't hit it off with anyone and have a fun time ourselves. Actually, one of the best nights we've had at the club was when the two of us just played as exhibitionists.

 

i think in general we would prefer to play with other couples at the club since that's why we're there, but we're ok if it doesn't happen.

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We are in the same boat with the rest of the posters. The rule is we hook up with another rarely but it does happen. We enjoy meeting, dancing, flirting with others. Sometimes it clicks, sometimes it doesn't. We enjoy our exhibitionistic side which can be great at clubs.

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We have been to clubs 13 times over the last year. I know that because this last weekend was our one year anniversary in the lifestyle and just for fun we counted them. We have only hooked up 3 out of 13, twice we were picked up and once we made the contact. So it doesn't happen as often as one might think. Sometimes we get frustrated when it dosen't happen, but we are inexperienced at the social game. We are working on it.

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We go often just to be with each other.... it is calming to sometimes just go out with no intention to pick anyone up. To just enjoy each other in a setting where we can be uninhibited.

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We go often just to be with each other.... it is calming to sometimes just go out with no intention to pick anyone up. To just enjoy each other in a setting where we can be uninhibited.

 

Us too. One thing I've noticed is that the harder you try, the harder it gets. When early on (before we learned better) when we would go to a club we didn't have the expectation of hooking up, but we did have at least trying in mind. What we've found though is that almost all of the times we have hooked up where when we weren't even trying, so now that's the approach we always take. It's a win-win :)

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Us too. One thing I've noticed is that the harder you try, the harder it gets. When early on (before we learned better) when we would go to a club we didn't have the expectation of hooking up, but we did have at least trying in mind. What we've found though is that almost all of the times we have hooked up where when we weren't even trying, so now that's the approach we always take. It's a win-win :)

 

It just detracts from the fun of the club to try to always hook up. We have only hooked up twice with couples we didn't know before meeting at the club. Now we either go fully intending to be only with each other or we make arrangements prior to meet a couple or even a group of couples we already know. Going as a group has been so much fun.... In anycase , the club is supposed to be fun and an escape fom everyday life; I don't want the club to turn into a place where I feel pressure. If that means we often just play with each other---- we're fine with that.

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Nearly every time. The biggest benefit we receive from swing clubs is to opportunity to meet people.

 

Reading the thread with a different mobile device highlights the fact that the question in the title differs from the question on the original post. Just to be clear, I was answering the question how many times do you _not_ play when you attend a club party.

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Guest screaminggood

We seem to have cycles of not hooking up, and other cycles where we literally can walk in and three different opportunities present themselves. I think it has to do with the "it" factor....some nights we walk in feeling awesome and everyone is attracted to it. If we are tired or more quiet then it usually doesn't happen.

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We are probably more likely to end up just playing with each other than we are to play with another couple. Sometimes we do get lucky, though, and meet some awesome people to play with. The point is to just go and enjoy whatever happens.

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We only play with others every once in a while sometimes multiple instances with different people sometime just alone maybe 50%.

We have also found that the more we try the less that happens. When we go to a open group room to just lie down and rest a bit the play comes to us. :)

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We went about once a month for many years to our favorite club. I'd estimate that we had MFM 40-50 % of the time and MFMF 30-40% and just us the rest. No matter what ahppened, we never had a bad time.

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often, we find no one that strikes our attention at first, but ya know... later in the evening, lites dim.. and we start playing together, odd how quickly a group starts to gather.. and ... somewhere in that group, is someone that gets our attention.. the worst thing that can happen is we have agreat time with each other alone.. still a great evening.!!!!

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We rarely ever play with anyone else either. Been over a year since we last played. We have tried many different changes but have been unsuccessful so far. Maybe 2013 is our year.

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I don't go to the club looking to play. I've made alot of friends over the years and enjoy hanging out with them. Sex is just a bonus. Now BDSM/Swinger Night is a different story. Then i'm always on the prowl :facelick:

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One thing I've noticed is that the harder you try, the harder it gets.

 

Thank you for that statement. I think it applies exactly to our situation. It sounds like the best thing to do is be prepared and then if the opportunity presents itself, great. If not, you have no expectations to be dashed. I think there's a lot of wisdom there.

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We always play. But, we go in with a "let's see" attitude. If it's a couple, then great. If it's a single female, then great. If it's a single male, then great. I guess we are just up for anything at anytime. :) But PJM is new to the lifestyle, so possibly he is just enjoying everything right now and will get pickier as time goes on. We will see. For now, it's fun to watch him.

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So we get really hot nights, where two or three opportunities come our way and we can do no wrong. Then we get really cold night where nobody is interesting and we just either 'play with ourselves' :fun: or just drift home and play there. Certainly one of our hotter memories was just us playing together in a large group room. Still turns me on thinking about that one.:dncdick:

 

I feel we always need to make an effort to try and get something going. We do actively 'step forward' and try and see how many people we can talk to. It's a bit of a game. Nights that are off have certainly included evenings where one of us was run down, tired or getting sick. One night I couldn't figure out what was going on. My wife and I head to the dungeon and in the middle of playing there she had to stop. We had sushi and she has a sensitive tummy. She felt really sick, so off we went home. It was funny because it kinda explained why we weren't connecting with people that night.

 

We do also notice we go trough hot streaks and cold streaks. I do not understand this at all. We do seem to go through periods where we are constantly hooking up. Then we laugh because it seems like a few 'cold' nights are going to come our way!! Sure enough, here they come!!

 

Still the atmosphere of most clubs is so liberating, we even love an off night.

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Guest

Probably a third of the time this happens to us. We nonetheless continue to go. Even at Desires, we flirted, touched and were touched, but things never progressed to a swap or other serious play 2 out of our 5 visits.

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Well, new to this but everytime we have gone to our club(except the first) we play to varying degrees. Single guy(s), couples or each other. Most times in public rooms, just playing around, have taken it behind closed doors if it gets too intense.

we like giving a show and almost always others try and join in on the fun. More often than not we are the ones to start. If we didn't want to play we could go to a regular bar.

Maybe we're wrong....but bad is good?

J&C

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When we go to larger hotel parties and clubs, we often do not play with anyone. It is hard to make a four way match on the fly. We do better when we meet another couple and take the party home

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