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  1. Back To Top | #1

    Default What are your hangups & traits you hate?

    We aren't perfect...we all have them. What kinds of things just don't sit well with you at a club, house party, out with another couple etc...?

    For me I don't want to party with anyone my partner or I were with separately? I just don't like the potential for comparison for either of us.

    I don't like women who are predatory....if you want to talk to or are interested in my man, then come and talk to both of us. Nothing drives me more crazy than the woman who waits for the two of us to part ways for whatever reason (ie: bathroom breaks, dance, getting drinks) and then she pounces. There is just something underhanded about it.

    I prefer seduction to blatent sexual come ons...the hey sexy I want to fuck you is better replaced with. Hi, my name is....we noticed you across the room and thought we would come and introduce ourselves.

    Anyone with others???
    Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself. "Harvey Fierstein"

  2. Back To Top | #2

    Default Re: What are your hangups?

    Quote Originally Posted by Amanda69
    I don't like women who are predatory....if you want to talk to or are interested in my man, then come and talk to both of us. Nothing drives me more crazy than the woman who waits for the two of us to part ways for whatever reason (ie: bathroom breaks, dance, getting drinks) and then she pounces. There is just something underhanded about it.
    Male and female predators are unsavory to us. Single or not, get to know us both or it's a no go.
    "No clothes, no problem"

  3. Back To Top | #3

    Default Re: What are your hangups?

    For me its couple who talk too much during sex. We were playing with this one couple and he kept telling me what he was going to do to me, and what he was doing to me, and he thought he was being kinky and he was just being stupid. It was gross. And it wasnt just him, his girlfriend was yelling at my husband, telling him to #@@! her harder, telling him she was a slut, she needed to be $#@!ed. It was ridiculous. They gave us no warning that they were into talking dirty and they were a very cute, and normal couple up until then. We just caught each other eyes, sort of laughed and made up some sort of safe word and got the hell out of there(hotel). You want to get a little kinky, maybe say a couple words, a little spanking, fine, but dont get crazy with the play by play, its a real turn off.

  4. Back To Top | #4

    Default Re: What are your hangups?

    This is not a swinging problem, but I am sure if my ex was a swinger it would become someones issue. He always asked after sex, "how many times did I make you cum tonight". There were several times I wanted to say 'Once...maybe twice, but the second was a little lame". Or he would say "I counted about 7 orgasims tonight". Um not you didn't. I came once. It was always in that lounge lizard tone. It really made me feel creedy afterwards.
    Be proud of your sexual abilites but you don't have to brag ALL THE BLOODY TIME.
    Your friend,
    Prettylady
    To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.

  5. Back To Top | #5

    Default Re: What are your hangups?

    LOL! I didn't think we really had hang-ups per se, but after this thread, I guess we have all the same "hang-ups" that you all do! Don't like the creepy predators, the blatant/gross come-ons, the excessive dirty-talkers, or the "was it good for you baby?" types.

    I'll add one. The Negotiator. You're dancing with a woman and the two of you are just being flirty, having fun, whatever. The husbands are watching from the side. You don't know this couple - they just happen to be in the club and you're just having fun. You haven't even had a conversation with them, yet. Just because you're dancing with his wife for the past few minutes, the other guy starts "negotiating" with your husband for the 4 of you to hook up (i.e. he wants to have sex with you). He assumes that your husband speaks for you and decides who you both are having sex with - and actually expects a yes or no??? Think again, buddy! No "deal"! This actually happened.

  6. Back To Top | #6

    Default Re: What are your hangups?

    Ahhhh, hangups...too much alcohol, drugs. Probably the number one and two for me. Predatory couples/singles as well for us. I would really do better with "hey, we/I am/are ____. We/I would like to get to know you better...." rather than "hey wanna fuck?"

    I guess chatty people too get on my nerves. I love getting to know people, but I do not have to hear your entire life story in detail and in triplicate before we play either.

    OH and lets not forget those that can't clean up. You all know the ones. Its the couple that you want to get together with everyone else and buy a care package consisting of soap, shampoo, razors, conditioner, and tips on how to use the products. Then you want to take em shopping and buy them a shirt that does not have a hole in it from usage. Stylish clothing can have holes, just not ones your washer put there from overuse.
    Our greatest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. - Marianne Wilson

  7. Back To Top | #7

    Default Re: What are your hangups?

    I am sure I have said this one 100 times before. But women who pretend they are bi sexual for what ever reason (hubby is pressuring them, they have convinced themselves they are bi) but after spending all your time getting to know them and making plans, you find out they are not even the least bit bi. And I am not talking about those who are bi curious and make that clear from the beginning either, I can respect that, it is those who come off like they have always been bi and have played with other women before.

    I also don't like those aggressive people who don't seem to get it when you tell them no. It's like they have mental brain block.

    And last but not least those people who have to be the centre of attention - they dominate every conversation, have lived ever scenario known to man, don't listen to anyone and try to make sure everyone wants them. In social settings I tend to be the one who does most of the listening, but sometimes I like to talk to.

    Ohh my that was a bit of a rant wasn't it
    "Well! Evil to some is always good to others." - Jane Austen

  8. Back To Top | #8

    Default Re: What are your hangups?

    Quote Originally Posted by EvilMJ
    I am sure I have said this one 100 times before. But women who pretend they are bi sexual for what ever reason (hubby is pressuring them, they have convinced themselves they are bi) but after spending all your time getting to know them and making plans, you find out they are not even the least bit bi. And I am not talking about those who are bi curious and make that clear from the beginning either, I can respect that, it is those who come off like they have always been bi and have played with other women before.
    Yes! Something I've noticed about these: It's usually the husband "promoting" her as very bi or really interested in bi, during the getting-to-know-you phase. He's trying to make the sale. Then later, you learn that if all the stars are aligned right, she may lay back and "let" you do her, but she most certainly doesn't want to touch or do anything to you. In other words, NOT bi. I wouldn't touch that kind of woman with a 10-foot pole, she obviously doesn't want it.

    We've found these couples to be a very pushy husband with a very passive wife.

  9. Back To Top | #9

    Default Re: What are your hangups?

    We have also ran into a few of those in our times. I also agree with the drugs/drunk issue. When a couple spends all night running out to the car and comes back smelling like pepee le pew...then thanks but no thanks.

    Also anyone who likes to brag about their latest conquests as though they are some sort of reference.
    Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself. "Harvey Fierstein"

  10. Back To Top | #10

    Default Re: What are your hangups?

    I think I'm my own biggest hangup. I have so many fears, not to mention I can't stand seeing my fat waist. I panic so much that I have a hard time staying wet. My hubby wants anal so much but the mear thought of it makes my asshole pucker...LOL. Although I've found Ambosol helps. I also start to feel bad that I think of being with a woman when we're having sex, so then I get distracted. How can I be so afraid of what I'm addicted to?

  11. Back To Top | #11

    Default Re: What are your hangups?

    pushy single/alone males. no still means no, right? we are soft-swingers, with the occasional full-swap that requires the right couple/situation. i get up to get my wife and i another drink, take a bathroom break, whatever, and come back to find her telling some guy she is not interested, but he continues to try and convince her to go to the play area with him. give it a break, guys! no still means no!

  12. Back To Top | #12

    Default Re: What are your hangups?

    Couples who post that they are "seeking couples" but really want a "single female." My husband and I have been in situations where the male and female of the other couple are interested in me and only me...my husband is a hottie and he is completely ignored...it is clear that they couldn't find a "single female" and so they started searching for couples. I know this is off-topic but I felt the need to share .

  13. Back To Top | #13

    Default Re: What are your hangups?

    ^^That's not off topic, Daisy, that's actually very informative.^^

    As for me, it's not so much sexual as social, like at parties: The lecturer. Have you met him? There's no conversation, just him talking about how Rome didn't actually fall to the Barbarians but was destroyed by disease and politics and lack of trees and lead poisening the water and blahablah... I'm not saying I'm not interested in learning new things, but when I'm at a social gathering, I want to be social. Not attend a seminar on how smart Lawrence is.

    I also don't like snobs at parties. It's hard enough to strike up a conversation with a stranger (for BOTH of us) and to start a conversation without people making it more difficult. Jeez, it's a society, at least be civil.
    Mr. Little Bird thinks Mrs. Little Bird is very cute...

  14. Back To Top | #14

    Default Re: Traits that you hate

    I am really turned off by: (and it won't matter how attractive you are)

    1) Aggressive people
    2) Dumb people (you know Jessica Simpson dumb)
    3) Plastic people, (dressed in the finest, only order the finest, wouldn't get sweaty if their life depended on it types)
    4) Potty mouth people
    Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself. "Harvey Fierstein"

  15. Back To Top | #15

    Default Re: Traits that you hate

    I concur with Amanda. Intelligence is the biggest turn on for me. Many plastic people are also a little on the 'impaired cutting edge mind' side. However, I will follow that to also say that plastic people may just be very very insecure and once you get past the plastic cover you might find some very nice people (maybe).

    Better Half

  16. Back To Top | #16

    Default Re: Traits that you hate

    Gosh, we're pretty much with the crowd.

    Looks really don't mean that much to us. We are looking for what's inside.

    I like having an intelligent conversation.

    I don't like people who have no sense of humour.

    I have to echo Amanda on the plastic people part. I really don't care about socio-economic status. I just like "real" people.

    I don't like people who are hygienically deficient. Shampoo and soap are not that expensive. Water is pretty much free. Yes, I've seen this with upper-middle class people.

    I'm sure there are more, but the high-pitched whiney sounding cheerleader types do nothing for me, either.

    Good Question, Shelly
    Dave & Holly

  17. Back To Top | #17

    Default Re: Traits that you hate

    We met a couple at a Meet n Greet here and invited them back for a hot tub chat... they were average, but we carried on some good conversation. Once in the tub, she felt the need to "add more of her own bubbles" to the water... not just once, or twice, or thrice, but it was pretty much a never ending parade of flatulence which continued after we got out of the tub... She never acknowledged any of this, by the way...

    We bid them a fine farewell and emptied the hot tub the next day

    V

  18. Back To Top | #18

    Default Re: Traits that you hate

    Quote Originally Posted by driveajeepnaked
    she felt the need to "add more of her own bubbles"
    OH Mylanta!! That's pretty much the most disgusting thing I've heard today.
    Dave & Holly

  19. Back To Top | #19

    Default Re: Traits that you hate

    Crotchitosis...A Real Bummer.

    M.D.
    "Just nod if you can hear me..."

    David Gilmour

  20. Back To Top | #20

    Default Re: Traits that you hate

    Quote Originally Posted by LFM2
    Gosh, we're pretty much with the crowd.

    Looks really don't mean that much to us. We are looking for what's inside.

    I like having an intelligent conversation.

    I don't like people who have no sense of humour.

    I have to echo Amanda on the plastic people part. I really don't care about socio-economic status. I just like "real" people.

    I don't like people who are hygienically deficient. Shampoo and soap are not that expensive. Water is pretty much free. Yes, I've seen this with upper-middle class people.

    I'm sure there are more, but the high-pitched whiney sounding cheerleader types do nothing for me, either.

    Good Question, Shelly
    I like intelligence also. But please help me here...what would be good topics for intellegent conversation when you are naked in a hot tub? And I am serious about this question...not just making fun of the thread.

  21. Back To Top | #21

    Default Re: Traits that you hate

    Quote Originally Posted by singleagain
    I like intelligence also. But please help me here...what would be good topics for intellegent conversation when you are naked in a hot tub? And I am serious about this question...not just making fun of the thread.
    Well personally I wouldn't bring up the fact that the warm water in the hot tub is good for incubating germ. But that is a good question, and I am stumped.

    The trait that gets to me most is excessive drinking. I have never been that comfortable around drunks and for me having sex with a drunk lady is about as sexually stimulating as doing yardwork.

  22. Back To Top | #22

    Default Re: Traits that you hate

    Nearly any conversation in a hot-tub tends to be good
    But really, we usually use the tub to get to know some history, likes, dislikes,swing-style, fetishes... or sometimes just sports chat with the men folk and kid chat with the ladies...

    We usually will chat about Hedo and how much we love it there, and the many stories that we can tell about it...

    Often, the hot tub gets "hot", then intelligent conversation turns into moans and... you know the rest... facelick

    Val

  23. Back To Top | #23

    Default Re: Traits that you hate

    Quote Originally Posted by DBL D
    Crotchitosis...A Real Bummer.

    M.D.
    True dat.....

    Pepper
    "Swinging is a lot like riding a Harley, ...for those who understand, no explanation is necessary; for those who don't, no explanation is possible." --Mr. Alura

  24. Back To Top | #24

    Default Re: Traits that you hate

    Bigots of any type.

    We met a couple a while back. They were a well-dressed, attractive couple about our age. After talking to them for less than two minutes, we found out that she really disliked some of the not as well-dressed "trailer-trash" that were at the club (not knowing that she was talking about some very good friends of ours), and he had an absolute hatred for Canadians

    Needless to say, we parted company very quickly. :rollseyes
    Carpe gluteus maximus
    Sum, ergo vulva edo
    Amor est vitae essentia

  25. Back To Top | #25

    Default Re: Traits that you hate

    Quote Originally Posted by singleagain
    I like intelligence also. But please help me here...what would be good topics for intellegent conversation when you are naked in a hot tub? And I am serious about this question...not just making fun of the thread.
    To be honest, we've never been naked with others in a hot tub, so conversation wise, I can't answer. From the sounds of it, it sounds like I should try though.
    Dave & Holly

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