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jstlkng

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About jstlkng

  • Rank
    Contributor
  • Birthday 12/16/1944

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Couple
  • Location
    Midland
  • Interests
    Bowling, fishing, boating (hope to buy the boat soon).
  • Occupation
    Self Employed
  • Swinging Experience
    None

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  1. I agree with those who have said this is a great thread...it truly is. Certainly there are those who don't profess to be Christians who are reading this. As Christians we should ever be on the cutting edge of what its like to live a Christ like life. I was thinking this morning about the social aspects of swinging and how I should relate it to my Christianity. Following is my thoughts from a social event I attended recently: First let me set the scene...many of you probably have never heard of a "Fish Camp". Fish Camps are nothing more than restaurants that specialize in southern style seafood dishes. But the Fish Camps around Belmont, NC are unique in some manner as opposed to other types of seafood restaurants. Primarily they are a social happening. The people who go there to eat come from every walk of life. But when you sit down at a table in one of these places with your SO or other friends, you are just as likely to strike up a conversation with the people at the table next to you. Because of the popularity of these places you usually have to stand in line to get a table and there is a free flow of conversation with others in the line. Those conversations are no more nor no less than conversations you might start at church, or if you meet someone at the mall, or maybe at a Friday night high school football game. The catalyst that brings it all together is the unique food enjoyed there. Now the Bible discusses food in various ways. Three lines of thought that come to mind are 1. Food as nourishment, 2. Food for enjoyment, and 3. Gluttony. In each of these only gluttony is stated to be an outright sin. Yet each is fraught with danger from contamination by germs caused by mishandling. Why people have even contracted deadly diseases from simply eating a simple meal. In order to enjoy this social activity most people wash their hands and eat properly prepared food. And all the while they are eating they are socializing with other humans, but they never take food off someone's plate other than their own without permission. They enjoy both the company and the food. No where does this constitute sinning. Swinging for Christians is no less innocent when practiced as the social activity that it is. There is a lot of waiting in line and talking to others to get to know them. There is conversation that takes place between individuals as others engage in sexual pleasure for all to observe. That sexual activity is taking place is no less nor no more sinful than eating in the other social setting. The dangers of sex are no more nor no less than those dangers that exist in eating food prepared out of your sight by people you never will get to meet. If fact, it may be less dangerous, especially if you wash your hands and use the proper prophylactics. And when the swinging is done as a loving, caring expression for physical enjoyment of all, then it becomes no more nor no less than any other social activity enjoyed by humans. Enjoy the social activities God has provided for us without guilt or shame. Use the same cautions and precautions you would for any other social activity. Open you mind to the enjoyment of your partners pleasure and satisfaction and you will begin to understand those of us who find no problem with sharing each other sexually. sweetnnasty had said in one of her posts: The only problem I seen with some of these posts is people not understanding the question... I didn't ask anyone to tell me what they think is wrong with it, but I did ask if there is anyone who is doing it and how they felt about it... Hopefully this will answer your question a little better and shed a little more light on why its not going to send either you or your husband to hell if you share each other with other people.
  2. I appreciate your observations TomDenise...the definition of adultery is best seen in the actions David took with Bathsheba. Had he asked Uriah, he probably would have gotten exactly what he wanted...after all he was the king. That's what happened with Abraham and Sarah when the neighbor king asked for Sarah. Abraham's problem was he gave Sarah away as his sister (she was his sister and his wife), not his wife. The real problem with most people is the inability to tell the truth openly for all to know. Most folks like to scheme to get their way when many times all it takes is to simply ask.
  3. TomDenise said: Something to think about. Was David, Abraham and King Solomon errant sinners? Are they all in Hell? Interpretation is needed. For any verse that can be interpreted one way needs to be balanced by the whole of the Bible. According to the verse quoted above King David, King Solomon and Abraham are all sinners. Very good point. Also there are loonies everywhere...not just in fundamentalist ranks. The sins of Abraham, David and Solomon are more far reaching than any supposed sex sin. It happens that you mention three of the greatest men in the Bible so what does the Bible say about these "sinners"? Abraham was made "father" of a great nation...the nation from which came Jesus, the Savior of the world. David was said by God to be "a man after God's own heart." and Solomon, a man of peace, was given the responsibility of building God's temple. He also wrote the greatest love book the world has ever known, The Song of Solomon. Both He and David wrote many of the Psalms. As a "fundamentalist" Baptist preacher, let me say that God is far more concerned about our relationship with Him than he is with our relationships with other people, whether in or out of bed. Happy Swinging
  4. O.K. enough already...as a Christian and a person who has made it a policy to read the entire Bible through each year since I became a Christian over 38 years ago (and not just reading it, but studying its precepts to show myself approved to God,) let me provide a simple explanation of what it means to be a Christian. The first occurrence of the term "Christian" is from a Greek work that means "little Christ ones" or "little imitators of Christ" and was coined by un-believers during Paul's time. It was a term of derision. None the less it was an accurate term. A Christian is simply one who trusts Christ for his destiny and tris to live like Christ during his life on this earth. I can only help in this area by reminding each of you that Christ asked the woman who was accused of adultery where her accusers were? You see, they had disappeared after Christ had knealt and written in the sand with his finger. Do you ever wonder what it was that was written that made all those men disappear? (I don't know either!) Christ did not condemn the woman, rather her forgave her of any sins she had committed. The entire story of what Christ did on this earth has never been told. The apostle John said all the books that could ever be written could not hold all the stories of what He did. But he did several things that I think are noteworthy. One, He refrained from unjust judgements. Two, He forgave freely. Three and I think most importantly, He fulfilled the Old Testament law completely and gave us a new law...the law of love. Some of you have stated that the things that keep you together as a couple are things other than sex. Certainly that is more Christ like than trying to tell Christians that to share each other sexually with others is wrong. If you don't appreciate the sermon please accept my profound apologies for delivering to those who don't want it, but I make no apologies for my sincere belief that "Christian Swingers" will never be an oxymoron. With love and grace in my heart for you all...
  5. We are Christians and very much interested in the lifestyle. We know several people who are professing Christians and have spoken with them. None of us can find any religious prohibition in the Bible for consensual relations. However, there are many who believe we will go to hell for sharing. As yet, we have not selected a couple to swing with...and we may never...we are fairly certain that we will have a hard time finding a couple with the same beliefs we have. Mr. & Mrs. Jstlkng
  6. Me too...but I have spent 40 years trying to tie a knot in my wife's clit with my tongue...it won't ever happen...but she loves the effort...orgasmically!!!!
  7. Being a male I can't even venture a guess as to why this is true so I asked my wife (who is straight, would not even consider a peck on the cheek from another female straight). She didn't know either. So I asked a few friends and I got a few answers: 1 - anonimity - swingers tend to keep things in the "club" and so women who like to play with women don't have to explain anything to anyone outside the lifestyle. 2 - my husband likes it...it turns him on. 3 - its the only way we can get couples who want to play. 4 - only women know how to please a woman. 5 - and the one I thought was the most honest...I like to eat pussy. This was from my cousin. She and her husband are both bi.
  8. We don't publish pics. First, my wife is not yet ready to swing, so when we run ads on line its for the possibility of making friends with open minded people, who, if the chemistry is right for all, may find that we are willing to have some fun. We just don't know yet. So we don't publish pics yet. There are several reasons: My wife is a nurse and well known in our community. I am the associate pastor of my local church. I am also a real estate broker. Should pics of us get out to the general public we would be the subjcet of much unwanted scrutiny. And our extra measure of discretion does limit out ability to meet others who are wary because we do not publish any pics at all. However, on the rare occasion we get replies we do share face pics...never body parts. Hey, there are a few of us out there who are not Ken & Barbie nor are we Frankenstein and his Bride either. Just being careful. Ben
  9. Well intuition you have good insight I believe. Thanks for you input and the input of others who have responded. Its my personal belief that the expression of deep love between a husband and wife transcends sex in that the sex act itself is designed to be self satisfying. So what I say, think and do in all other matters is far more important as a way of saying "I love you" than the act of sex itself. In fact, a simple "I love you" may be more stimulating to my wife than any amount of sexual pleasure I can give her. I know it is for me when she tells me she loves me.
  10. Just so you will know we am not trying to bring out all the narrowminded condemners of swinging. We have already had preached to us about all the things that are wrong with swinging/extramarital sex. As Christians, we don't buy much of what organized Christianity has to say about sex outside marriage. So...here is our question. If you are a Christian (defined as one who trusts in the power of Jesus to save one from himself) how you are able to enjoy swinging without guilt? And please don't assume we are suffering from some deep seated guilt or emotional complex. We just want to know what others think on this subject.
  11. well...yes we do have some toys...cyber skin is almost like the real thing and my wife loves the extra length and girth she gets from one of those toys Our kids are in their thirties and I would guess they have toys of their own, so we told them we had some and to stay out our closet when they come to visit or they might just have to explain what grandma and grandpa are doing with those "disgusting" things.
  12. She is not quite ready to get involved as yet so when there is a post its me. however, we do read together and sometimes i post her thoughts.
  13. My wife has always led a suppressed sex life; felt that sex was ok, but it was always up to me to initiate it. She never says she is interested, but has the most intense orgasms you could imagine. It is almost like she hands out sex to me as if it were a reward for acting the way she likes me to. Maybe I'm wrong to feel this way but I think sex is all about fun and pleasure and love is all about relationships and caring for each other...each is not mutually exclusive of the other but a loving relationship can be quite sexless. I have a male friend whom I love deeply and would do anything for him...except sex...never never never. On the other hand, I have sex with my wife because it is fun and also because I love her and want her to be happy. But if she told me we would never have sex again I would still love her and care for her and provide her with all the love I have in my heart. All that to say, how do I get it across to her that swinging is for fun/pleasure and our relationship doesn't depend on it or sex of any kind?
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