YoungCoupleInMinneapolis

My wife has the unfortunate disposition of being incapable of putting on a convincing act when it comes to showing real interest. All I have to do is look at her. If she's initiating conversation, we're good to go. If not, I buy drinks, cover for her, make fun of her shyness out of respect for the other peoples feelings, and try to get out of the situation with no emotional damage inflicted. Me? If I don't like the situation, I'll have a story to get out of it preplanned, and I'll use it at an oppurtune time, and she'll know by the way I'm totally lying about why we have to leave that I'm not cool with it. No hurt feelings is the main goal if it ends up being a no go.

Its real simple. If they appear closer to our parents age than ours, we shy away. There isn't much worry about finding younger couples, (in fact, I wish that WAS a worry- we're both 24,) so looking up, if they could've gone to high school with mom n' dad, it just doesn't feel right. I guess that puts the age limit at approximately 15 years older, give or take. Of course, finding a couple with like interests and instant chemistry overrules any age limits......

One point I'd like to bring up that it seems everybody has been kind of pointing towards but haven't actually said is this: The vast majority of people, in our experience, that frown upon or don't understand swinging have relationships that tend to be rocky, ridden with jealousy, or worse. And sometimes slightly better. My wife and I have what we consider to be the absolute perfect relationship. We both share identical intersts when it comes to sex ans swinging, and after 6 years together are both still madly in love... We have this understanding, and absolute 100% complete trust in one another. Swinging to us was a natural progression, because our relationship eventually grew to be as strong as it possibly could, and so in place of worries and jealousy, we decided maximum pleasure was a good route to take. We have yet to tell our lifestyle to any of our friends without having them immediately have some kind of hangups/prosyletizing/issues with the lifestyle. It just so happens that none of our friends who have a problem with our choice have a relationship that we would come close to admitting was as solid as ours. People can only identify with what they know in regards to relationships, and so they picture themselves in our shoes, and immediately they forsee the problems they would have swinging and assume that those problems should be universals to the lifestyle. As can be seen by the great people on this msg board, the trusting, confident swingers also unanimously enjoy great relationships with their partner. Sometime we forget how lucky we are to have what we do, and rather than try and impose our life on our friends, we try to explain why we have no problems doing what we do because our relationship is so perfect. I think people have realized their own shortcomings because of things we have said, and if it helps people realize what they need to work through, than we've done all we can. All of you with a healthy relationship and great sex life, remember how lucky you are.