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M&S

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  • Content Count

    212
  • Joined

  • Days Won

    6

M&S last won the day on June 20 2013

M&S had the most liked content!

Community Reputation

265 Excellent

About M&S

  • Rank
    Swingers Board Addict
  • Birthday 06/14/1973

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Couple
  • Location
    Canada
  • Interests
    Aside from the obvious, mountain biking, outdoor sports or pretty much all kinds, politics
  • Occupation
    Professional
  • Swinging Experience
    Almost three years
  • Anniversary
    2001

Swinger Info

  • Favorite Club(s)
    The Club, Ottawa

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  1. We've never even fought about it. We have always been fine with playing in our own bed; I guess we don't really think about it as a 'marital bed'
  2. I am not so sure poly it is really gaining traction. I think that prolific, cheap media has found a salacious topic in polyamory, so they make shows. But that should not be confounded with growing acceptance of polyamory or polygamy. My own belief is that swinging (and other forms of friends with benefits, casual sexual connections) is becoming more socially acceptable because sex unlinked to love is becoming more acceptable. In this case, the change in society has to do with how we see sex (not how we perceive love). Swinging is, I believe more about sex for fun than sex for love. The reason I do not believe poly is becoming more socially acceptable is because I do not see a similar change in how we see love; I am not saying it is right or wrong but I think an overwhelming majority of people (and it is not decreasing significantly) see true love/marriage/lifetime together as a couple thing. I do agree with Chicup that perhaps more people are tolerant and do not care. To me, this is likely about the decline in religion as opposed to an increasing acceptance of poly
  3. I have had a woman's finger up there, but it is very rare, and I think because it is rare, I enjoy it. The first time for me was during our first threesome, the other woman stuck a finger up there. Initially she just touched my ass and asked if it was OK. I said sure, and it felt good -- I would not say amazing but it was different and seemed kind go wild, so I decided I liked it. Because my wife is not at all into any sort of ass play, it is something that only happens very occasionally she we are with another woman. I have no desire to do it more, but it feels pretty good on those rare occasions.
  4. In Canada more people seem to use AFF, and it updates your age automatically
  5. We have had a different experience. We have, I would say, "moderate" club and party experience - probably 25 times at 4 different clubs. We have very often seen older crowds were there was very little playing. We have also seen young people eager to participate fully. I would say new and younger people can be more hesitant to jump right in, but I think this is completely natural. Personally, and this may not be popular, I find this thread has a pretty strong hostility toward the pretty and the young. One of the things I love about swinging is the non-judgmental atmosphere.
  6. I would say you MAY (underline MAY) be on a path to swinging. For us, the first step on our road to swinging was when we decided to engage in more playful sexual activities (e.g. porn together, a few strip clubs). This was nothing like swinging, but it opened our eyes to sexual possibilities and it allowed us to see that expanding our sexual horizons could be fun and non threatening. For us, it lead us to swinging. But this was just us. You have to make really sure that this is where your wife wants to go. I would suggest she has to get there by her on accord (not coerced). If you push too hard, it will be a disaster, but since she is becoming a bit more experimental, you may find you do not have to push at all.
  7. Agree with above -- I think you just have to try a few more clubs. In our experience, there is a wide range of ages and MANY people in their 50s and 60s
  8. I really like this topic. We have always had a hard time moving from drinks and discussion to a decision on playing. We were out with a couple recently - they were newbies and we were more experienced. There was obviously a connection between the four of us, but the discussion was pretty vanilla. After about an hour, the woman form the newbie crowd said "this is really fun, but let's get down to our reason for being here.... we like you guys, and we were excited to meet someone we might play sexually with, So, do you want to come back to our place." It was perfect, but I was struck by how easily, as a first timer, she did this whereas we have huge difficulty with that transition.
  9. We have recently tried some of the online adult Truth or Dare Apps. They can be fun and easy to pull out on a whim
  10. I agree completely with what has been said -- each act, especially big league stuff like watersports, needs explicit consent for both the giving and receiving. That said, he seems like it was a legitimate misunderstanding and he feels pretty badly about it. I am a big believer that to be successful in the lifestyle you need a pretty forgiving of mistakes or crossed boundaries when it is derived from a legitimate misunderstanding or misperception. This seems to be the case here, so I would let it go
  11. It will be interesting to see how the show is executed. I hope the producers do not succumb to the need for ongoing drama and, thereby, play up tensions and conflict between characters. This seems to be the way of many reality shows.
  12. If this is what both of you like then there is, of course, no problem with it. I suspect the reason you may be questioning whether this is normal (or wise) is that you wonder if this could lead to crossing an emotional line that is closer to polyamory than swinging. The fact that you enjoy it leads me to believe that this is not the case, but only you know if your wife is getting to attached beyond your comfort level.
  13. This is great advice so far. The only I would add is that you might want to develop some other hobbies. It seems that in the evenings, sex and swinging consumes your thoughts. Especially with a child coming, having some other, non sexual things, that can keep your mind of sex might help with your obsession and balance things out a bit for you, When my wife and I started swinging, it seemed we fantasized and talked about it non stop in the early days. Eventually, however, that plateaued and it became a healthy, reasonable part of our life, not our entire life
  14. For meeting people online, I don;t think we would go under 28-30, as the risk of compatibility is too low. On the other hand if we met a couple at a club, liked them and could carry on a good conversation and found they were much younger... no problem. This has happened once and the couple are friends of ours still
  15. I have no problem with the notion of paying a couple to swing. If there is a buyer and a seller, as long as no one is hurt, let the market work. Like others, I would not do it myself. One of the draws of swinging, for us, is the process and intrigue of meeting a couple, making a connection and then playing.
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