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OhioCouple

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OhioCouple last won the day on November 26 2012

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About OhioCouple

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    Mega Contributor
  • Birthday October 8

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    Married Female
  • Location
    Ohio
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    Self Employed

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  1. Others have made some very good suggestions (Specifically in regards to ED) however here is another POV to look at. I don't know if there is really a right or a wrong reason for contemplating swinging (unless it involves cheating), and I can only give you our version, which has had it trying moments at times - ones our marriage may not have made it through had not all else physically and mentally been in good shape. Our sex life was great (still is), neither were in our first marriage and we openly disussed it to death (so my husband would say) even though I was the first one that brought it up in a fantasy, never expecting it to become a reality. It did, and we enjoyed every moment of it, however we knew well enough when to back out when other critical events occuring in our extended lives needed our full attention. The stress of these outside events distanced us, sometimes both mentally and physically. All of which had nothing to do with swinging. So maybe ask yourself, these things. Is your overall relationship with your wife in good order? Can your marriage withstand a snafu here and there - which is more common than not in the new found land of swinging? If you can't answer yes to the two above questions, then my advice is to not take this route in hopes of 'spicing it up'. There's nothing wrong with spicing up a sexual relationship, but it's best done when doing so based on mutual desire and understanding.
  2. A lot of great ideas have been expressed here. I agree with most of them. One thing I didn't see touched on, is the fact that you are still relatively new to swinging. Mistakes can be made in abundance...I know, we made a lot of them. It goes back to the communication. Sit down with your wife and take the time to adjust your rules, discuss what bothers each of you and find a resolution. Only then should you resume swinging, in any shape or form. Be it web cam, instant messaging, or doing the ditty. The excitement of doing something that both are in total agreement would be fun, can place you in situations that are less than exciting or fun, for either one or both of you. Clearly you are in a less than fun state, and I would be willing to bet your wife is too. She may feel sucked into this person (which I wholeheartedly agree you need to talk to his wife) and not know how to get out of the situation without seeming like a prude. It's obvious that their chats have shown where she relayed that you would not like some of his requests....and some of her talk, most likely is not knowing what to say or wanting to be a 'hip' swinger...afraid to say differently. My suggestion is to put a halt to all activity...webcam, instant messaging, swinging...until you can discuss this together and reach a resolution on what is comfortable for both of you. Your marriage is worth more than swinging. Best wishes to you both. Please keep us informed.
  3. I, Mrs. O, have zero problem with either sex exploring each other. As long as all sexual acts take place between consenting adults, I find the thought of it highly erotic. While I wouldn't participate in some activities that other enjoy, I don't frown upon those that enjoy it, yet still find it so cool that others are 'allowed' to. (for lack of better words) And isn't that what it's all about? I also believe that society as a whole, is becoming more open to the concept of 'equal' rights, be it the goose or the gander. Excellent topic.
  4. You express 'she wasn't dirty', so I'll take that to mean that you did not encounter any unpleasant scents, just a difference in appearance. Everyone's body is different and you most likely encountered someone's who was different than what you are used to being exposed to. As a bi-sexual female, I've been close enough to view my share of different genital areas, and I can't say that I've ever seen two the same. If she was freshly showered, then I can understand why she might have been offended by your comments, as she may have thought that your were questioning her cleanliness, when in fact you were questioning why her genitals were not what you are accustomed to. If this is the case....I suggest a heart felt apology and admission would be in order, rather than trying to 'clean her up' to fit in with your expectations. As for the 'stain'...I've seen the anal areas of both men and women anywhere from snow white, to pink, to dark in color. All were nice and clean. As Julie said: I also fall along the lines of being overly blessed with hair and quickly growing, at that, which makes for a royal pain in the A$$ if it isn't attended to a couple of times daily. The coarsness of the re-growth is a problem for me. What I can and do, do...is to keep it neatly trimmed. I hope that helps some.
  5. I am in total agreement with everyone here. Excellent advice has been given. I would like to add one thing....opportunity is knocking at your door. This is exactly how it evolved for us. I wasn't real receptive in the begining when we started talking about the 'what if's' , but as I became more comfortable in talking about my own sexual fantasies, I was almost more raring to go than Mr. O. Don't jeopardize the relationship you have with your husband...instead, capitalize on this opportunity to learn more about each other....you could find yourself more than pleasantly surprised.
  6. We have been 'found out', though not caught in the act. We did not disconinue swinging, however we do take more precautions now.
  7. I've seen quite a few pictures, in which I've wondered just the same. Out of curiosity, I visited our ad site and pulled up a few pics of those closest to us. Leaving out the 'crotch shots', most were pretty okay, however there was one in which the gal looked seriously deformed. The camera angle was just all wrong and it looked as though she had the waist of a toothpick and the extremities of a whale. Another photo projected what she normally would most like look like...so why use the other? Just to fill the slots on the front page? I've seen photos where the people may be happy and smiling but their surroundings are littered with garbage and dirty clothing, pictures where there are pictures of their loved ones surrounding them (usually by the mantle) and some that didn't look like they bothered to comb their hair this month, much less brush their teeth. Surrender I think some of it may just be the eagerness to have a photo up so that they may get more attention, for the rest, just plain old ignorance.
  8. Oooooh... I'm here to tell ya...the UPS guys have been on my 'hot' list of things I wish to do (completely) before I die, for at least 15 years now. facelick I'd say that I'd make the 'age' factor, not a preference for any of our local guys. The highlight of my day is a UPS driver dropping off a delivery.... Hot! Hot! Hot! Especially on the days when I see two or three of them!! Notice, I said...'driver'. We now also have one 'REALLY' hot female driver.... Oooh La-La!! They wear shorts here (still are) and ....they are hotter than ever!! It's criminal I tell ya. They are just 'asking' for a come on... Excuse me while I try to douse the fire....
  9. My posting is focused on what you had to say here. I get the feeling that you are just going along with this and really have no desire, what-so-ever. I get this impression from the wording of "I've tried" and "I know how important it is to him", which strike me as someone who is not at all comfortable with joining in this form of recreation. I'm also bothered by the use of the word 'Important'. Neither Mr. O or myself find swining 'Important' in our lives. It's a wonderful aspect that we have/do share together, but it is far from being 'important'. If it is the case where you are only participating to please your husband, then you should do as others have suggested, talk to your husband and let him know "Hey! This just isn't working". I find it admirable that you gave it a shot, but if it isn't for you, so be it. Relay this to your husband and then hopefully the importance that swinging has on your husband will not be more important than the commitment you have with each other. Our best to you, and hopefully you will come back and register so that you can not only respond to this thread, but you will be able to look through all of the valuable resources here on this board, which are only available to registered users, and you will find that no matter what you are feeling, dozens of more have felt the same.
  10. We are in the two-four year catagory, but not actively for all of it due to other obligations which have caused us to halt during certain periods. We still manage two-three times a year tho for 'getting away'.
  11. I get it now Mrs. Good Times. That flew way over my head I suppose. Please forgive the knucklehead that I can be at times. :slam"
  12. Speaking from the perspective of a female in which this kinda got sprung on me once many moons ago with Mr. O...I pretty much took the stance that your wife did. Knowing now, what I did not then, and due to the fact of the time between your postings, my best bet is that you brought the subject up, out of eagerness. Entirely understandable. However speaking only for myself, when my husband first brought this up to me, every insecurtiy that I'd ever had, cropped up. We had often had fun talking in fantasy, but he was talking reality and that scared the bejeebers out of me. Of course there were a lot of other factors, such as we had only been together a few years, I'd been cheated on in the past...etc. I voiced my distaste and the matter was dropped. Several years later, I was the one who re-introduced the prospect. By this time I had had time to research the swinging lifestye, time to adjust in my role as a wife and lover, and comfortable with knowing that we had a firm committment to each other. While he had dropped the subject, imagine his surprise when I suggested it. My advice to you, Shady, is that now you have planted the seed it is time to follow your wife's lead . She may or may not embrace the lifestyle, however you have each learned something new about the other. If you dare, you may want to show her this website for her to read on her own, or the better case scenario...you read it together. Best of luck to you both and Welcome to the board!! Mrs. O
  13. Wow, Mrs. Good Times, I'm not sure what sparked that sort of response out of you. I shall assume that 'we' means yourself and your self and your husband. Honestly, I'm shocked, that sort of response is so unlike you.
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