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How easily do you give out your phone number? Once upon a time the main form of meeting other swingers was via bulletin boards or printed swinger ad magazines. The latter often had "direct contact" ads, meaning that you provided your phone number for direct contact. That's a little creepy to me - giving out my number to god knows who.

 

Nowadays, we have the internet, and often people complain that the internet leads to too much wasted time of back and forth on emails without any real contact.

 

So how do you feel about giving out your number? Are you the type that is willing to give it out to anyone? Or do you hang onto it until after you really feel comfortable with someone and KNOW who's calling you before they call? Or are you somewhere in between?

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We are members of the "in between" group. We give out a cell phone number once we feel comfortable enough to know that we are interested in talking and planning a meet. We have broken that rule once with a couple we had gotten very comfortable with on chat and one on one cell phone conversations and wanted to have a 4-way phone conversation but cell speakerphone wasn't an option, too many ears around.

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I'm telephobic. I have my wife and kids numbers in the phone, nothing else. And it's turned off probably on average 23.5 hours a day. I never answer the house phone and rarely answer my work phone.

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We give people our prepaid cell # ($30 for the phone and about 30 minutes worth of talking, at Wally World) after we set up a time to meet someone. If something comes up, they're running late, get lost, etc., they can get ahold of us. Once we've met and decided that we'd like to play, we give them our regular cell numbers--never our home phone.

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I'm telephobic. I have my wife and kids numbers in the phone, nothing else. And it's turned off probably on average 23.5 hours a day. I never answer the house phone and rarely answer my work phone.

 

I'm pretty close to this - I loathe the telephone most of the time. I just leave mine on vibrate and forget to look at it most of the time as opposed to turning it off.

 

We have given a cell phone number out once we've set up a meeting. There's no reason to not call if someone is running late or is going to cancel.

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We rarely if ever give our home phone # and only to close friends. We do however have a 20 dollar wal-mart swinger hot line phone. Mrs.fun keeps it and we have no problem giving out the #.

 

I believe it is about 15 bucks for a month's worth of air time.

 

So far it is discrete and convenient.

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Good morning! We will give out our fax number, if they are sincerely interested. With all of the fax machine around, they can drop Katie and I a message. We will return their call, if they have placed a contact number as requested. Our home phone rings at home, as well in the office.

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We have given our cell # to a few people, but only after a meet up is set. That way if someone is lost or late then we can get in contact.

 

We do have a house phone, but we are hardly ever here to answer it...so we never give it out anyway.

 

Maria :kissface:

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We have a cell phone we use just for this. It doesn't cost much at all to add another line.

 

Playmates in our close circle have our home number, and have been to our house for house parties.

 

Mrs. D

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You all are too smart for words. Why I never thought about a separate swinger "hotline" number/phone is beyond me. I'm quite disappointed in Mr. Fun and me ... we're usually much more on game. LOL!!

 

I usually get the digits, and use my cell phone if I need to. I can only think of three times I've talked to any of our playmates on the phone.

 

Thanks for the great idea!!!

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We screwed up once and my wife gave out her number and not mine. The other husb. called all the time. I had to step in it was not nice!

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We pretty much give our cell numbers to anybody that asks. We rarely give our home number to anyone, swinger or not.

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Both of our lines are business with a LOT of advertising done for both of them. We are very careful about who we give the numbers out to. In this day of reverse number look up, it would be so easy for a nasty "stalker" to find out who we really are. If you want our number(s) you better be very trusted or a business contact.

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Use a throw away buy by the minute phone.

 

There's also websites out there that allow you to have a phone number, when they call that number they are able to leave a message and you get notified via email. It's free too.

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Like vjklander and rpu3, I hate the phone.

 

Typically any phone stuff is done by Mrs Spoo. But we don't give our phone number out all of the time. We typically start with email. It is an easier way to communicate for us.

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we will give out cell numbers, but never the house number. we will pogram the number of the couple we like to our phones. if not, we don't answer numbers that we do not reconize. you get the point.:D

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A cell phone number is what we give out if needed. And we only give that number if we have arranged a private meet or want to talk on the phone before our first meet.

 

A cell phone number is an emergency thing, something we can use to call people if we can't make it because we've been in a wreck or some such havoc. :lol:

 

Only a few people have our home/work number and it's because we know them well.

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We're probably in between on when we give out our numbers, and it is always just our cells. Usually after several emails back and forth and we are actually meeting somewhere so in case someone is late or lost, etc.

 

Kind of a funny thing happened with this yesterday though. I have a bunch of phone numbers of others in my cell phone. Many times we'll meet a couple we mesh rather well with at parties or clubs and they'll take my phone and program their numbers into it so we can call them at a later date. So this weekend we are at a club and it is a bit slow, so Mrs. WS tells me to send some text messages to friends and tell them to come on down and check this new place out. You would never believe the number of "who is this?" text messages I got back. The moral of the story? Never give someone your number when you've been drinking, you may not remember who you gave it too the next day! :lol:

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We'll give our cell numbers to those we've met in person or are setting up a meeting with. Only close friends get our home number.

 

=)

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Guest Charmed6879

We give out our cell numbers too. We both have free incoming calls on our cells so we use it 98% of the time regardless. We use our home phone rarely, and only give that number to very close friends.

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If we give out any phone numbers it is usually my cell number. We normally don't do that unless we have talked a lot via email or if we have a date setup. Once we get comfortable with another couple we will give out MrsVan's cell number also.

 

Single ladies usually only get MrsVan's cell and single guys usually only get mine. Just to keep the stalking factor down as much as possible :)

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We give out our cell numbers fairly easily, once a date has been set up, or, more likely, when we've met someone at the club we want to follow up with.

 

We don't talk too much on the phone, but I must admit, I've become quite the texting whore in the last year.

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I don't give it out until I know someone very well. Even then, I only give my cell phone. Very very few people have my home phone number.

 

Never really thought about why I don't give it out more readily, I just don't see a need for someone that I am not close friends with or even more, to have my home number.

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I'm a bit more casual about giving my phone number out than maybe I should be. If Mr. Fuse were more outgoing, he would handle the phone contacts (sigh). I give out my number when we decide we're possibly interested in meeting someone. Usually we've already seen their faces, exchanged a couple of emails, and perhaps had an IM session. If I am comfortable that they are not weirdos, and we all think there might be an attraction, I invite them to call us.

 

It would probably be better to use a prepaid throwaway phone for this, but frankly I am too lazy to keep that kind of thing straight and keep track of two phones. If I ever get stalked, I will get un-lazy in a hurry. So far, I've not had a single unwelcome phone call in close to three years.

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We're with Fuse on this one. I think there's a lot of value in not having to track two phones. However, our tune would change the first time playmates having our numbers was abused. And we never give numbers to anyone we're not at least on the way to meet, so that feels close enough to an ounce of prevention for us.

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We would never give our home phone number out unless it was to close friends. Landline numbers can be reverse searched to give your home address and your full name. And I'm not going to take the chance on that. Too many weirdos our there on the net. I do give my cell phone number if it is appropriate, it is on 24x7.

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Geez -- thought I was the rare one who doesn't like to talk on the phone to the point of being "telephobic". Looks like I have plenty of company here!

 

Anyway, we're like most of those who have already commented. After we've set up an initial meeting, we give my cell number -- never hers -- for emergency contact purposes. And it's implicit that we don't use the phone for general chitchat. I'll write or chat online with you all day, but I simply don't like talking on the phone.

 

We've only given our home phone number to one couple, who have become very close friends with whom we socialize more than we play.

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Wow:) Funny to read these responses. I, too, am a telephobe. That said, I can be a text whore. Text me all you want, but please don't call me::P:

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We keep them a secret... Most times we will give out one before a meeting. We use im as our primary contact. We have been lucky with who may call us but we both hate the phone.

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We as of right now pretty much have a we dont share phone numbers rule.

 

Part of the reason is we have had a couple of friends that seem to text non stop and really dont want that, and dont want to seem rude when we dont answer them. The other part is a 14 year old kid that uses our phones a lot of the times so getting texts from strange number or about strange stuff when she has the phone is not good.

 

We have had a few couple ask us for our numbers in case they need to get ahold of us or something when it is the day of a meet or something of that nature. all of these have yahoo messenger and on their phones as do we. What I dont get is, if we all have yahoo, what is the need for a phone number, why do some continue to ask about a phone number so they can text us. It is to the point with one couple that if the male ask my wife for a phone number or mentions it again, I am going to tell them we are not interested anymore.

 

We did have a couple that had our numbers, then the four of us decided to take a break from playing for different reasons, they wanted to stay in touch, we wanted to have some quiet time, so we asked them not to contact us until we was all ready, they never texted or tried to contact, until we sent them an email an started talking again, we still did not want text or phone calls, which they have complied with that request. (That is our type of Couple), we also have a couple that has our number, but the only we talk on the phone is meeting day so they can tell what room number they are in.

 

For me, the male half, I just really do not want called and texted all the time, we like to do things together so we will both get on chat at the same time and stuff like that. she dont have to worry about me texted 50 times a day, or me her. it works for us.

 

We have also had the occasional email from people on SLS with this as the only thing in the email

 

"take a look at our profile, if you are interested, text or call us xxx-xxx-xxxx"

 

seems a little weird to me that someone would give out their phone to someone they have never met before, it might take me six months before I trust someone enough with my phone number.

 

If you stuck around long enough to read all this, and want to pick through my ramblings and make some comments, I would appreciate.

 

I don't know if I feel over protective of our phone numbers, or if other people are just to willing to share.

 

Thanks for letting me vent

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We have a 'burner phone' we use for the LS - makes us feel like secret agents or spies to call it that ;)

 

This keeps our chocolate and vanilla lives a little more separate (we both use our phones extensively for work), and if at anytime something goes south (i.e: someone will not respect our contact wishes) we can ditch the phone without much cost. Our kids don't know this phone exists.

 

Having said that, we still only give out our number to vetted couples (usually those we've met at least once and are comfortable with).

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We have also had the occasional email from people on SLS with this as the only thing in the email

 

"take a look at our profile, if you are interested, text or call us xxx-xxx-xxxx"

 

seems a little weird to me that someone would give out their phone to someone they have never met before, it might take me six months before I trust someone enough with my phone number.

 

If you stuck around long enough to read all this, and want to pick through my ramblings and make some comments, I would appreciate.

 

I don't know if I feel over protective of our phone numbers, or if other people are just to willing to share.

 

You are tighter with the digits than we are, but we don't give them out as freely as the example you noted.

 

All of our swinger friends have our cell numbers. Even with that, we don't have a problem with texts or calls. Everyone is respectful about that type of thing.

 

If you aren't comfortable giving your number out, then don't give it out until you do feel comfortable. What works for us may not work so well for the two of you. :)

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We usually don't give out our number unless the other couples does first. I think the only exception was a single female but she has never contacted us in that way.

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We are pretty tight with our #s, but we will give them out if we are headed out to meet someone, with the note of "in case you need to cancel". We never imply or otherwise that it's there for more than that and we've never had a problem. We also have it in our profile that we don't do phone before meet, etc.

 

That said, we also don't do yahoo chat (or any other online chat). Me personally, even if we did, I'd feel better having a phone # to call if there was an issue that required cancelling at the last minute (or being late) than to do it by text or chat.

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We don't give out our number either. email with smart phones seems simple and less likely to have someone call or text while at work with something NSFW.

I've thought of getting a burner phone. Seems like a waste of money though. If people can't meet without my phone number, maybe we do not need to meet at all.

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We generally only give our number when we are planning to meet someone. It has been helpful when they (or we) are running late, or can't spot each other at a crowded restaurant.

 

I do like to text, but one guy was overly texty and it made me uncomfortable. I would just answer his texts by emailing through the swinger site and eventually he got the hint and stopped texting. Otherwise I do love the occasional sexy text. My phone is very basic so i don't access the web on it. I would not just give my number out in an introduction email or on my profile. We have a google voice number we were going to use for swinging, but have found that it's really not necessary. I tell my kids phones are private and I'm a stay at home mom so the nsfw is not a problem for me. My husband doesn't like to text so we usually just use my number for swing contacts.

 

I think it's fine to give your number and then specify that you are not the texting or phone talking type. Then they should only use it as needed.

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We give out our number to people we are going to meet. We like to text and say hi once in a while too if the other couple is into that. I've never had any problems with this. We like to be friends with our playmates and figure if they can see us naked, they can have our phone number too :-)

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Nobody of our acquaintance has gone crazy with text messages. All phones are set with passwords so that offsprings, relatives and busybodies will not see things that do not concern them. Neither of us do Yahoo since it became a 50-inch pipeline for spam.

 

 

Sent using Tapatalk

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We are pretty tight with our #s, but we will give them out if we are headed out to meet someone, with the note of "in case you need to cancel". We never imply or otherwise that it's there for more than that and we've never had a problem. ... Me personally, even if we did, I'd feel better having a phone # to call if there was an issue that required cancelling at the last minute (or being late) than to do it by text or chat.

 

Our policy exactly, hasn't been a problem.

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We are pretty tight with our #s, but we will give them out if we are headed out to meet someone, with the note of "in case you need to cancel". We never imply or otherwise that it's there for more than that and we've never had a problem. We also have it in our profile that we don't do phone before meet, etc.

 

That said, we also don't do yahoo chat (or any other online chat). Me personally, even if we did, I'd feel better having a phone # to call if there was an issue that required cancelling at the last minute (or being late) than to do it by text or chat.

 

This is us as well. We've not had a problem, in fact, one couple we hang out with a lot will text if they're free one weekend or if they want to get together and go to dinner, but no other couples have ever called or texted if we aren't planning on meeting.

 

If I thought someone was going to abuse our phone number, we would definitely buy a throw-away phone just for that purpose.

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We don't usually give out our numbers unless we are planning a meeting and then just for the purpose of any last minute issues. The ladies get my number and the men get his. We got burned once - the guy of the couple who ended up with my number and texted me a lot. When I told him I was not the texting type, he got all pissy and said forget it and we haven't heard from him since.

 

When we get an initial email with a phone number, we are immediately turned off.

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To each his own. Tell people that you don't give out your phone number. That'll let them know quickly what your boundaries are... in more ways than one, actually.

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That part that gets me is, The man of the couple that has brought up phone numbers 3 times so far has a smartphone, along with his wife. Both have Yahoo messenger on them, as do we, so sending something through that is not an issue. I just don't see his obsession with having her number. I basically told her to tell him, if he brings it up again, we will no longer be getting together with them.

 

Now for the weird part, yesterday I gave out our number to another couple, they are more respectful of our wishes.

 

So now that is three couples with our numbers that do not abuse the privaledge.

 

The bad part is, the couple with the pushy husband, both of them are amazing in bed when we get together, so we would hate to give that up.

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I would use a e mail address solely for swinging With today's phone you can access any email anytime, just don't set it on push mode so your kid will not have access to it, you will have to log on to the e mail account to access it. be sure to tell other people you might not responsible in a timely manner as it is a private email

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if i am planning on meeting someone, i give my cell number and tell them not to text me.

 

if they text me, i ignore it, or ask them to call me. I dont give IM info because I will not, at all, IM with folks other than one or two select people.

 

if they continue texting and annoy me, i write them telling them so. if they don't care, i'm done with them.

 

I want people phone numbers because I want to speak to them before meeting. Not IM, not text, but speak to them. If a couple refused to give their cell number (and I always tell them not to worry, i wont text them), I am going to be incredibly wary of meeting them.

 

As a side note...why does your 14yr old play with your phone? They should be old enough to understand the idea of leaving theirs parents things alone if asked to.

 

Not trying to be mean, just wondering. I know this post comes across a little harsh, I apologize...been a long day.

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As a side note...why does your 14yr old play with your phone? They should be old enough to understand the idea of leaving theirs parents things alone if asked to.

 

Not trying to be mean, just wondering. I know this post comes across a little harsh, I apologize...been a long day.

 

Maybe play with was not right words, she uses it to talk to her friends, and like most 14 year old kids, if a text comes across while she has it, she might read it, and seeing as the phone displays the text on the main screen, if the phone beeps she is going to look to make sure it is not another phone call, so she will see what is said.

 

And for some reason whenever a guy texts the wife, they feel the need to start it with "whats up babe", or sweetie, or sexy or some other term, so then you are stuck explaining why some guy is calling mom sexy or something else.

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I have a burn phone and separate email/messenger account for my swinging activities. I do not ever mix my vanilla life with my swinging life. I swing for NSA sex ...not to make friends or business contacts. I'm not looking for a relationship so there is no reason for anyone on the swing side of my life to have any of my personal information. Although, I have made friends in the lifestyle, but I don't swing with them. I'm fairly new to this so they often talk me through issues or concerns, and we like to hang and talk about sex.

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