Jump to content

MulderNScully

Registered
  • Content Count

    68
  • Joined

  • Days Won

    1

MulderNScully last won the day on June 3 2010

MulderNScully had the most liked content!

Community Reputation

19 Good

About MulderNScully

  • Rank
    The Truth is Out There.
  • Birthday 09/20/1965

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Couple
  • Location
    Dayton, Ohio
  • Interests
    Dancing, music, travel.
  • Occupation
    He: Courier/ She: Nurse
  • Swinging Experience
    Mulder and Scully: Since 2001

Swinger Info

  • SLS Name
    EdNBrenda2004
  • Favorite Club(s)
    Temps and Cupids are close, we like Club SinDay in Middletown, Ohio

Recent Profile Visitors

The recent visitors block is disabled and is not being shown to other users.

  1. Happy birhday and have fun

  2. I'll try to explain this from an IR standpoint. Mulder is the black one; Scully is the Irish, fiery redhead one. We both enjoy the lifestyle, have had good times and bad times with it, and have found those we've made friends with have turned into lifelong friends. I guess what frustrates me with the current thread of race is on line we find most times profiles who have basically made it clear they don't want either black males or IR couples. There are three ways I can feel about this rejection: 1. Not their preference 2. Something much deeper 3. Racist. I try not to go to the last one most times, but for many blacks this is always going to be a part of the psyche. For those who wonder why this is such a big deal with us understand from our point of view: We want a fair share and shake of the pie on every aspect of the plain. Our ancestors didn't have the choice to come to this nation willingly. Now that several generations have gone by, we are here and are trying to enjoy the "pursuit of happiness" just like our neighbors do. It's a struggle in the workplace and elsewhere; for many in the African-American community sex is just another plane to this constant struggle for acceptance. There was a study just released this week stating how the pay median between white homes and minorities are in such a huge gulf that black homes may never catch up to where white homes income are today. This rankles people like me because we work hard, try to follow the rules, pay taxes, etc. Why can't we have a break like my white brothers and sisters? We're educated, have feelings, and (yes) like to get our freak on. Is it because of some personal defect on me that keeps me from enjoying an intimate moment with someone white or is it something deeper? This is always part of our psyche. I do think one good thing has helped me come to grips with these feelings and that is patience and a willingness to present a different point of view to my white brothers and sisters can indeed reap benefits. Good friends of ours we met four years ago wanted to get together for some swing time. I freaked out about the male with Scully because of my own insecurities (I was young in the lifestyle and had to learn to deal with my feelings); the female of the foursome couldn't be with me because it was more than just me being black, but I represented something that hurt her deeply. In her past, she was assaulted by a black male. She knew I wasn't that way and knew I was a fair player, it was just I represented a painful part of her life. It took time, many visits outside of the lifestyle, and time before she felt comfortable enough to flirt with me. Eventually we had a wonderful time together enjoying each others bodies and the entire evening. Even though they moved south of where we live we know if we ever meet up again it will be a night we'll soon won't forget. Now this is only an aberration, not the rule, but this is just a positive event which worked out for all of us. Does this mean this is the rule for most couples, not at all. Some of the resistance could be due to perception (i.e. Black males have bigger cocks than whites) which brings insecurity to white males. Some white males may feel they are threatened by the perception that blacks, Latinos, or Asians are better lovers than whites. I think this is foolish on some aspects (Hint: Males in general, for examples, can win a woman's heart if they learned how to dance on the dance floor and woo their lovers/wives to bed) and some truth on others. My point is I think for as much as I feel sometimes of being singled out because of who I choose to fall in love with and the rejection we've been seeing in the past few explorations on line we don't let this get us down. We know not everyone is into us...their loss. We think we are a very unique, thoughtful, and passionate couple. Life is our dance floor. You can either sit back and judge us for what we don't look like. You can judge us by what we wear, what color we are, or whether our choice of musical taste fits yours. Or, you could join us on the dance floor and enjoy the party! Too often we sit back against the wall and criticize but lack the courage to bridge the gap and get to know the crowd dancing on the floor. So whether you think of us as worthy, or not; whether if we fit your preference, or not we're going to dance. We're going to dance until we can't dance anymore. If the floor fills up its going to be a busy night. Mulder (MulderNScully) P.S.--I think sometimes the joy of coming to a swing event helps us defuse the perception of many who may not have given IR couples a chance. For as good as the Internet is it fails to really give a true perception of the total person as a whole. I won't lie there are knuckleheads in my community that embarrasses us as a whole. But knuckleheads are found in all races and really sets back our respective communities as a whole. To base an entire group of people by the few who are acting ignorant is both a bad way of perceiving one another and a set back in relating to those different from us. I hope my thoughts are not seen as an attack on one group or justifying that our group is "better" than others. Not at all. We are all in need of dealing with our faults as a race, gender or species. I'm just here to say those few bad apples makes us throw the whole pie out and it is a shame because I think we all like pie one way or another.
  3. I just stumbled to look at this topic and I got to say we've been pretty open and up front about our weight situation. Since October 2009 we've been loosing weight together for a combined weight loss of 135lbs. We're hoping to loose a bit more, but I'm 6-7 and I think the height situation scares people off more than the weight sometimes. Then again, if I saw 300lbs. too I think I'd take pause a bit. We try to be upfront about it because we'd expect the same from the couples we engage--both on and off line--and if we find out they lied to us we tend to think "if they lied about this then what are they going to lie about later?
  4. I was going to make a separate post regarding this issue, but seeing how this is as engaging--and surprisingly thoughtful--discussion about the Lifestyle and racism let us share our issue we're dealing with right now. Scully and I are an interracial couple in real life. I'm 6-7 and 298lbs; she's red haired, got tattoos on her back and ankle, and is a proudly described "hippy/non-conformist". We've participated in the Lifestyle for nearly 10 years together. What we experience as a couple is either several things: *Either people are intimidated by us because we don't easily fit any group or pairing. *Either they avoid us because of my race and size. *Either they engage Scully, but not Mulder. *Either they engage Mulder, but not Scully. *They don't care, they like us as a couple and think we're cool. Sometimes its racism, pure and simple; sometimes its preference, and you can't change that with a person; sometimes its deeper. We had one couple where the woman liked me, as a person, but couldn't engage with me because of a past trauma involving a black individual. Time, healing, and counseling got us to finally get together and have a great time. I'll comment more later but I have to leave for work. I want to say more, but at the moment I think the whole interracial issue is as interesting to us as to the poster.
  5. Okay, Scully and Mulder will bite, but it will also reveal our true identities for the first time. To say we are not open to some scrutiny to maximize our on line experiences as a couple in the Lifestyle is both fruitless and senseless. We welcome any constructive criticism you and our cohorts can give. On Swing Lifestyle it is: EdNBrenda2004 On SwingerZoneCentral it is: EdNBrenda2008 Any advice is welcomed...Thanks in advance.
  6. You know, this is a good time for all of us struggling to maybe do some budget swinging or budget parties where everyone brings something and meet at a safe place and share the cost together. (just a thought)
  7. Hey there, This is the first post MulderNScully have made in months so I guess this one stuck out because I (Mulder) tend to be on the tall side in real life. I am 6-7 tall and on my dad's side of the family we are tall. It tends to intimidate people because of my size and height. People don't realize the height is just one dimension of who we are in the Lifestyle. Come by, get to know us, who knows you might like to climb the mountain for some fun.
  8. This is easy! Big time X-files fans from day one and would have gone Jack Bauer, but he has no one to be hooked up with long enough to put a screen name. I meane Jack and Audrey, you saw how that romance went. What's funny is we do identify with both candidates: My Scully and the real Scully are in the medical field; I and Fox want to believe and are full of information.
  9. Now there's something new! Never thought of the bookstore/theatre as a place for a pick me up, but you just never know. We don't have adult theaters around here, but the other one to check out is the gentleman's clubs/strip clubs. The only danger with this is if you plan to have cash to blow like a trip to Vegas don't go there. I'm surprised at the number of couples will go there and it is a fun time--especially for Scully and I.
  10. Julie, you're right about the clubs paying for themselves, but I think for those out there who are going stir crazy and wanting to get their groove on, but are on a budget house parties may be the best way going because you need a house (that's one), people (two, if you know a good crowd) and three, interesting attributes to get the party started (DVDs, hot tubs, etc.).
  11. We'll have to visit Reno someday. *L* At one time in Dayton (Ohio) we had four clubs running. Now we have two (one rumored to be opening soon) and the one has a huge hot tub, swimming pool, and a dungeon room (old health spa). $40 bucks is the normal price, but there is a club in Columbus where if you are not 60 miles away you will be paying close to $100 for a couple. Single men must shell out a hell of a lot more than single women, but that's usually typicial.
  12. Hey Sweet TNA, We both can relate to this one! Trying to find a sitter sometimes is like trying to pull out teeth from a shark. We got one teenager who has a high demand and one friend who is going through some issues of her own and can't always be counted on. She's six and her older sister is 13 so if it comes down to having a night for ourselves we may employ the 13 year old to "earn her keep". In July, we make our annual "pilgrimage" to Columbus (Ohio) to see the Dave Mathews Band. Not sure what else we'll be doing after the show, but trust me we'll have this thing cemented before we leave for the concert. As for our lifestyle explorations, we'll just have to play it by ear.
  13. Let's face it. Times are tough all around us and it affects every person--swinger and non-swinger. Gas prices at all time highs. Food is shooting skyward world wide. Cost of living going up. Paychecks decreasing. Jobs dwindling in some places. But I'm just curious to find out what swingers do when the times around them are tough? How do you budget and find ways to make the dollar stretch when mommy and daddy need some quality time with the neighbors next door? Currently I (Mulder) write for AskDanandJennifer.com on religious/censorship/repression issues, but I want to write an unrelated story about how good swingers around the country/world overcome obstacles and find ways to have a sexy good time without it pillaging the wallet. I have a few ideas of my own, but I'm curious if anyone here on the Swinger's Board are in the same boat like most Americans and find it hard to justify a sexy night out when the bills got to get paid and the gas to get to your destination is too high for words. Thank you all in advance and I'll keep my ears open.
  14. I (Mulder) attest to the fact nurses are ladies on the floor but freaks in the bed. Scully teaches me a thing or two in the bed and can be one of the hottest women I ever known. She is into the toys and so many things I can't even begin to imagine. Yet, at the same time, she is very selective and picky when it comes to who she plays with. Where I'm pretty open to nearly any woman Scully tends to stick with her favorites and maybe have a moment or two with the right woman/couple. Now for flight attendents I'm not sure; the friendly skies and the ladies I've seen are either way sexy or way fugly.
  15. See, I got to tell you we have the paid site with Swappernet, but free with SLS and AFF. One time I paid one month for all three and of the three we prefer Swappernet. AFF is okay, but can't tell who is real and who isn't. SLS will stay free as well as AFF, but Swappernet we know folks who we've partied with we keep in touch mainly with Swappernet. Funny story about AFF. We visited this bar for Halloween just this past weekend and found they had an Ohio group that was part AFF and we're like, "where are you guys at, we couldn't find you on AFF." Too many groups and fourms to keep up with. Mulder (MulderNScully)
×
×
  • Create New...