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Dynamar

Registered
  • Content Count

    783
  • Joined

  • Days Won

    5

Dynamar last won the day on September 15 2008

Dynamar had the most liked content!

Community Reputation

246 Excellent

About Dynamar

  • Rank
    Ready-Willing-Able
  • Birthday 09/15/1964

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Single
  • Location
    A flyover state
  • Interests
    watching movies, dancing, tag sales & auctions
  • Occupation
    sales
  • Swinging Experience
    3 years

Swinger Info

  • SLS Name
    Dynamar
  • Favorite Club(s)
    Have been to Reel One in Indy

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  1. Stupidest rule ever. Kissing gets my motor running, and I don't play with people who have that rule.
  2. Plain and simple, talk to your wife. Calmly and rationally, and not in anger... although I'm hearing a lot of anger in your post, and perhaps rightly so. But nobody can take advantage of you without your permission. You and your wife need to get your thoughts and feelings out in the open ASAP. However, ultimatums, hard lines and time limits probably aren't the answer. Good luck.
  3. Not to be smart-alecky, but... saying 'hi' is always a good start! As a single female who has in the past been interested in playing with couples, the quality I most appreciate in the female half of a couple is friendliness. A woman at a party who is friendly to everyone speaks volumes about the facts that she is participating of her own free will, knows what she is after and is confident about being there. So, take that as if the Mrs. is not all of the above (and I'm not saying that she isn't), then a single female probably is not going to be interested anyway. The last thing most of us (single females) want is for anybody to perceive us as an interloper encroaching on your relationship. Therefore, many don't make the first move unless it's that unspoken "Look" that rackir writes about so eloquently. Even then, you or your wife will most often need to be the one to verbally open the door. That being said, there's plenty of ways to initiate a conversation... think of the same things you'd do at a vanilla social gathering or even a business networking event. "That's a beautiful top" or "I love your shoes, where did you get them?"... "I/We've not seen you here before... we are Joe and Susie."... any of the other openers mentioned here... or my favorite, used in all types of situations: "I don't believe we've met, I'm DeeDee". And badabing... you're talking! Good luck!
  4. A lot couples I have come across expect a single male to pay the ENTIRE room tab, which I think is rude as hell. Many post the fact that they expect the dude to pay in their profiles, which is also rude as hell. As a single who believes in equal-opportunity swinging, I'd never play with a couple who had that attitude.
  5. If we were only going to have sex in the room, and then leave... I have always offered to pay 1/3, however, I've never had to actually make good, because the couples would never hear of it. If I was staying over someplace, I would always have my own room to retire to (which I've obviously paid for) after playing anyway, so either they would have sex in my room and then leave to their own; or vice versa.
  6. I seem to recall a Real Sex segment about a Jill gathering... for the express purpose of teaching women to appreciate and develop their own orgasmic "abilities".
  7. I think your intentions were pure Vi, but like SAM, all these letters in different orders and u/l case are making my head spin. I'll stick with MMF/FFM for a three-some where "all play equally," as I like to say. Or MFM/FMF where the same sex people are never engaged in anything but incidental touching. Works for me.
  8. And you can think it... but when you try to down other people for how they participate, that's where you go wrong. There's lots of fish in the proverbial sea... so play with couples and ignore singles. Good on you. But why, as SecretAsianMan points out, be so vehement in dissing singles, be they male or female? What did we ever do to you? In answer to your question, the answer is "Yes"... he wouldn't be the man of my dreams if we couldn't be in the lifestyle.
  9. My situation is similar to that of Malachista. I've been out there on two sites for over three years... the mail was unbelievable for the first couple of months... I thought I was going to either get carpal tunnel or a secretary! But then tapered off to where, now, I get about 5-7 a week... more if I've changed my city because of travel. I'm very fastidious about answering every mail, however, just because I think it's the polite thing to do. The "no thank you" email is very simple and direct... "Thank you for writing, however, I am not interested. All the best in your quest." I also state in my profile that it's not prudent to write me back asking "why" if someone gets such a mail from me. I rarely have anybody who writes me back after I've sent them the no thank you. If they do, or if they try to rip me for it, I just block them. If a guy gets too clingy or weird, I delete him from my Yahoo friends list and report him as spam if he tries to IM me again, and also block him on whatever site we met on. It's always done the trick. In the interest of fairness, I should also say that I'm very interested in meeting single men, and have met lots of quality singles. All of them have been contacts from online, as I don't go to clubs.
  10. I do think that is a boundary that should have been discussed by both couples before Husband B helped himself to the sausage buffet. However, I also think that you have your head in the sand if you think no bi-males attend your club. A closeted bi-male is a bi-male nonetheless. /threadjack
  11. I don't disagree with LFM, just wanted to point out that, unfortunately labels are less for ourselves than to help others understand us. My .02, for what it's worth.
  12. Warning: alert! And what if you're a single female? Who's never been involved in the lifestyle as half of a committed couple? Your opinion may be your opinion, and you're by all means entitled to it. But you kinda muss up your logic when you use the word ALL. Because this swinger did not start as a couple. [/threadjack]
  13. I'd say all of the above. To me, any single (male or female) looking to participate in the lifestyle differentiates him/herself from vanilla singles by the venues they choose in which to find casual sex. Swingers seek out lifestyle websites, clubs and house parties. Many swingers are open to playing with couples or in groups, or participating in bi-sexual activity. Vanillas use dating sites, bars and nightclubs. Many vanillas (although not all... I'm not making a blanket statement here) are pretty much serially monogamous.
  14. That's all well and good, but perhaps she still would not have wanted to. I know I wouldn't. It's not a personal thing against people I play with... I'm just a better alone sleeper. Glad you had a good time, though.
  15. You, as a couple, need just-the-two-of-you time to reconnect after playing with anybody, single or other couple or whatever. The single female needs the same thing... well, in my case, it's watching a little Sportscenter and rolling over and going to sleep, alone, to snore like a freight train in blissful privacy. Since your room is comped, why not offer to split a second room for her? She's making the effort to come a ways, I'm assuming, to meet you and that shows a lot about her comfort level and desire to meet up with you. Everybody wins. And for the record, I don't expect anybody to pay my way. If a couple offered to split a room for me, I'd be very flattered and appreciative and depending on the situation, may not even take them up on it. Bottom line, everybody needs time in their separate quarters after playtime.
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