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Plumeria

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About Plumeria

  • Rank
    100 Posts Club
  • Birthday 06/07/1959

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Single
  • Location
    Seattle
  • Interests
    Horse sports (racing, show jumping, etc), football, movies, working out
  • Occupation
    in transition
  • Swinging Experience
    None

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  • Favorite Club(s)
    n/a

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  1. Yeah this thread is reassuring to me too. Like Spoo, I had noticed the trend in porn getting more and more anal obssessed. I thought maybe I just wasn't "with it" like the general population. lol As for why it's become such a trend, I think the one's who cited the 'taboo' aspect of it as probably close to the reason. Also, I think it's sort of the 'new toy' in porn. I have a friend, who said her boyfriend had never been able to have anal sex with a partner before, and she liked it, so he was like a "kid with a new toy" and wanted it practically every time they had sex. She figures once the newness wears off, he will lay off concentrating so much on it.
  2. I agree, and it's a turn off for me as well. Even during IM chatting. It may be because my mother insisted on using proper English at all times. She would spell-check my hand written notes, telling her I was going over to a friend's house. I would arrive home, and see a "graded" note that I had left her. She also would not let my brother or I tell about our day, without using proper grammar and would stop us mid-sentence to correct us. I would sometimes be stopped a half-dozen times in four sentences and as frustrating as it was, it was an effective deterrent to speaking incorrectly. In any case, like the others mentioned, that sort of typing in emails and IM's, leads me to wonder about the age, or intelligence of the person behind it. How much work is it to type just a few more letters?
  3. LMAO! I do too Intuition! Actually, I got a little better at it once I learned how to do the phone sex thing. However, all the terms were a struggle for me, because I was raised in a household, where cursing was strictly forbidden. I was even afraid to curse outside of home, for fear something might slip at home one day. lol In any case, I know we're not talking about cursing her per se, but that "gutter language" as my mother called it, was really difficult for me to get used to as an adult. Same here, and also gives me the impression that my "partner has a less-than-acceptable level of respect for me." Although I do not have any fantasies that involves that kind of language. In addition, you can add the c*nt to the list as well. That word is a sure-fire turn off for me, no matter how it's used. Probably because I only heard it at school, as a derogatory word against girls. But I'm no psychologist by any means.
  4. Too funny! I guess it's universal. My family owned a HVAC contracting business and I used to hear stories from our service guys (or overheard is probably more accurate ) Anyway, I would hear them tell of lonely housewives that would change into something sexier while they were checking their furnace. A lot of times, it got warmer in there, and not just because he repaired the furnace Same thing in the summer...they would go out to check the air conditioning condensing unit and go back in to adjust the thermostat and the lady of the house would be in skimpier clothing. One woman was even bolder. She answered the door in her robe and it conveniently came untied at the waist to reveal she was completely nude underneath...
  5. Okay, I finally had the meeting, and so here's the update. The meeting was set for Friday night and I did really well with not having too many butterflies about it I had printed out the posts from here and re-read them, whenever I would start to feel nervous. What REALLY helped, was thinking of it as just meeting new friends for the first time. We met at a local restaurant, for dinner and drinks. I thought I would be the most nervous at the last minute, but as I walked into the restaurant, I was only slightly nervous, which was good. They had just arrived, so we essentially got there at almost the same time. Right off the bat, they struck me as really nice and their smiles were just as warm in person, as in their photos. They seemed pleased with what they saw too, and commented on how my pictures had been a good represention of how I truly look and not all they've met with before, are that way. Anyway, we sat in a sort of out-of-the-way section of the restaurant and were far enough away from other people, to give us some semblance of privacy, which was nice. We then ordered and just talked and the conversation was really easy and never forced. I suddenly realized all of my nervousness was gone and they didn't seem nervous either. We had several things in common...food, favorite drinks, hobbies, places we've traveled to and the things we saw there, etc. Towards the end of the meal and later in the evening, is when the subject turned to sexual preferences and history. I listened to stories of some of their encounters and what they were hoping for with this one. I answered their questions about my sexual experiences and they were surprised with how little experience I had. A lot of it had to do with the years I worked in our family business, and rarely had any spare time of my own to date and whatnot. Plus, I had a few years of taking care of terminally ill parents almost 24/7 and that cut into my social life. In any case, they really liked my honesty they said, and liked my demeanor and personality, but were reluctant to go past anything but friendship right now. Their main concern, was my inexperience, and I can understand that. They knew I didn't have any swinging experience going in, but didn't know I was so inexperienced in general, until we talked in depth. They were still interested in keeping in touch though, because we seemed to hit it off rather well. Anyway, the meeting went very well and we had a great time laughing and talking, and ended the evening with warm hugs and a promise to keep in touch. So even though we won't be doing any playing at this time, they seemed genuinely as glad to meet me, as I was them
  6. Thanks Kitten! I can just imagine how you squeezed your husband's hand, because I think I would be too! But it really helps to hear how your nervousness went away pretty soon and you had a great time. Your suggestion of no play on the first meet is a good one too. Good idea! Thanks!
  7. Thanks! And it's cool to have a friend close by so to speak.
  8. Thank you so much for sharing your story Dynamar It really helped and I can tell my jitters are about this are beginning to fade. Amazing what a little perspective from people who have "been there" can do for helping to calm the butterflies. I can understand your reasons on the first encounter, too. This couple is actually younger than me...15 for her, 10 for him, and so my age was sort of concerning me to a degree. Although I've always looked and acted quite a bit younger than my actual age. Anyway, I appreciate you sharing your story, because it helped. I also feel better about not attaching too much importance to the outcome. Instead, just meet and see what happens. If nothing else, I'd love to just make new friends, since I don't have too many of those right now, having moved to a new place. Thanks again, and yes, I'll let you know how it works out
  9. Thanks Intuition! I think you're right, and 10 minutes into it, I'll have forgotten all about whatever made me nervous to begin with. All I've seen is their pictures, and read their emails, but from their faces, smiles and words, they seem like genuinely warm people. It was what drew me to their invitation to begin with, I'm sure. Anyway, I'm sooo glad I posted this, because everything you all have told me so far, has helped a LOT. Thanks
  10. Yeah! I don't know why, but I was a bit amazed they were cool with me not giving them an answer right away. I don't know why. Probably because like you said, "One of the things I think people forget about the internet and email etc is that when you hit the send button, it doesn't go to a computer, it goes to people, with the same concerns we ourselves have." I had already told them up front, that I had absolutely no experience, so they were just being understanding of me not throwing caution to the wind and saying, "let's for it!" Wow, imagine that? Oh boy, I sure have! I almost always end up having a great time, and wondering why I ever dragged my feet about going. lol Thanks for reminding me of that!
  11. Yeah, I think I've read every story on here...lol Believe me, reading it all really helps too. Thanks
  12. Yeah, I think that's another reason for the jitters. I was sort of thinking of this as 2 against 1....lol
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