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woody1987

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  • Content Count

    2
  • Joined

Community Reputation

15 Good

About woody1987

  • Rank
    Just Getting Started
  • Birthday 08/15/1987

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    couple
  • Location
    california
  • Anniversary
    xx/xx/xxxx
  1. Thanks for the input, Unfortuantely i have communicated my uneasiness with their arrangement, and she has defended their friendship so that they may stay in contact( our friends in this city are few and I try my best to weigh this as well). I value her feelings and have tried to allow things the way they are, but I always seem to come back around to not being "ok" with the arrangement.
  2. Hello all, To begin this is my first post, and I know the lifestyle is a very warm and friendly community so I appreciate all input in advance. So the misses and I have been in the lifestyle for a few years, but there has been an issue of friction that can't seem to go away. When we first joined the lifestyle, we weren't sure what we were looking for/interested in (as most people I'm sure). We both naturally feel comfortable in the swinging environment, but we quickly learned we both have different tastes. Myself, I prefer to use the lifestyle as an extension or enhancement of our relationship, therefore I'm mostly interested in same room situations, but not completely closed minded to other encounters. While the misses has discovered that she is more so interested in individual experiences, which I may not be comfortable with but I accept, we are different people with different tastes in that respect. Shortly after entering the lifestyle the misses met a male at a party. She expressed her interest in him, which I was fine with- I mean we joined the lifestyle to pursue our personal desires after all! At first everything seemed fine, she asked if it would be fine to go out on solo hang outs with him, which at the time I had no problem with. After a few months of this went by, she asked for permission to sleep with him. At the time it didn't seem conventional to what I was into, but I know what works for me isn't necessarily what works for her- so I gave my consent. Thereafter, their relationship seemed to develop, they both definitely were into the situation, and all of a sudden I felt on the outside looking in. I became insecure, and uncomfortable with the situation. I approached the misses about this, and she understood- and vowed that their friendship would never go to that point again (Platonic basically). Since then, they have stayed in close contact and went out for drinks in the evening quite often to hang out and enjoy each others company. As much as it makes me uncomfortable, I have tried to cope with their arrangement, after all I don't want to be that partner that ties the other one down on a stake because they are insecure. But truth is I am uncomfortable with how close they have become. And when I bring it up with my spouse the idea of cutting ties never reaches the surface- it always goes to defending her freedoms she currently has with him. I know they talk on a regular basis and it wears on me. I would love to come to terms with their friendship, but circumstances of the past makes it hard for me to believe that that's all it is- a friendship. (There are parts I left out so I wouldn't leave a novel on here, there were times she omitted facts of their encounters for one reason or another.) I don't know where to go from here. We love the lifestyle and have had many great experiences in it- but this one seems to loom over most of the positive experiences we've had. Any advice would be much appreciated!
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