One of the best things about us swinging is I felt that we had ultimate comfort in our marriage and that we both had let go of hurtful things from our past. Keep in mind that we are only 2 week veterans of swinging, so these could be growing pains, but here is my story.....
I've been with my wife for 7 years. 2 years dating, 5 years of marriage. After about a year of dating I found out that she had been texting her ex. Of course it was "it's not what it looks like, we're just friends". We got into a huge fight and split up. While we were apart she moves in with one guy and then another. Several months later we got back together. Of course the things that had happened were hurtful to me....even if we were technically not together.
Fast forward ahead to 2 years ago. She decided not to come home one night. I hear rumor that she's fucking some guy from her work. Then she fucks up and sends me a picture of her pussy one day that she meant to send to yet another guy. (At this point 5 guys that she has fucked or tried to fuck). She hooked up with a chick during this too, but I wasn't too upset about that.
So last night I tell her that I'm glad that despite all of the hurtful things from our past that we are now so comfortable and have put all of those things behind us that we are actually swinging and feeling good about it. (Big change given our history)
I tell her that I forgive her for all the things that she had done to me in the past. At this point I expected a hug and kiss and maybe even a "thank you" and a "I'm sorry". Nope. She blew the fuck up on me and asked how dare I forgive her. She said "shit happens and you have nothing to forgive". This absolutely destroyed my mindset and brought back all kinds of bad feelings.
Of course now I'm wondering if continuing to swing is right for us (or if timing is not right) because I felt like she shit on my feelings and down played them. Am I overacting? Is she right or wrong? I'd love to hear some advice If you please. I fear our marriage maybe wasn't as strong as I thought.