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ashleybelle86

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  • Content Count

    4
  • Joined

Community Reputation

15 Good

About ashleybelle86

  • Rank
    Just Getting Started
  • Birthday 05/02/1986

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    M. Female
  • Location
    NYC
  • Anniversary
    xx/xx/xxxx
  1. That sounds fair enough. Not sure if I'll go on my own though. I think part of the fantasy I had was both hubby and I there..... Not sure applying hubby's logic about the ad to the AXE body spray follows, but I can understand the rest. Honestly, I think he's worried he would end up wanting the other woman more than she would want him. Of coarse that's something that gets worked out before hand, but then he worries if I am really into the guy I will have to take a pass. Hubby isn't the most aggressive guy in the world, but he has always risen to take occasion (ok maybe pun intended lol) and knows how to take charge when its wanted. P.S. - I was checking out other threads and found one to support hubby's claims. Actually, I would say it was him if I didn't know better! Since I can't post links, the title is "Anybody else have issues with "equality" / equal attention? "same speed" issues?"
  2. Hi all!! Sorry I disappeared on everyone and thank you for the insightful responses! Hubby and I have talked on and off about the issue. He said he is satisfied with just me and felt that the lifestyle has enough guys in it already making his presence rather meaningless. He showed me the listings on Craigslist of the mw4m, mw4mw, and mw4w. There weren't many listings of the mw4m variety compared to the mw4w and almost all of the mw4mw said they would welcome just a single woman (some specifically said no men). He's not saying I shouldn't try. In fact he encouraged me to give it a try on my own and said I would probably have a very easy time meeting someone who could really get me turned on. I don't think he is anti-swinging. He just doesn't want to seem to deal with the atmosphere. I'm hesitant to try without him though as I don't fancy the "cuckholding" arrangement. Anyone have any thoughts on this? I did bring hubby here btw but he saw the main ad with the 2 blonde women kissing. That was rather inconvenient to prove my cause lol!
  3. Hi guys and thanks for the replies! Hubby said he'd rather not be left holding his dignity (no pun intended) or stopping me from having a good time in exploring my desires in the heat of the moment. I explained the "us" part of this to him and he said the idea is nice in theory but in practice the man just ends up the party pooper either as a fact of nature or culture. :-( Sigh! How difficult is it to find 4-way chemistry? Maybe we shouldn't bother with parties (not that crazy about them) and do more couple 1-on-1 so its more personal?
  4. Hello! My name is Ashley and I'm new around here. Hubby and I are not swingers yet, but we did discuss it. It was actually my idea and I though he'd jump at the opportunity, but he didn't quite do so. He said he understands 100% why I want to try swinging and admitted that he finds it a nice idea in theory. He said he is confident in our relationship and feels very secure with me. It wasn't me so much that concerned him as much as how he believes men are treated in the lifestyle. Apparently he knows a couple that used to swing and the male half told him that all swinging eventually boils down to the women have sex with each other and maybe a select few men. The other married men basically stand around playing with themselves and are treated as if its a privilege that they are even allowed to be there. The friend told him that the women get so close and free with each other that eventually they prefer other women over the men. He said even the most considerate guys get swept aside. The couple hubby knows is still together, but they stopped swinging since it became too much of an emotional chore. Hubby said he would feel pathetic playing with himself and he doesn't care to watch me have sex with another woman (weird I know) for eye candy. The other women aren't exactly my reason for wanting to swing although I would be open to the experience if it happened. We discussed that and he said he understands my feelings on the matter. He also admitted he was a bit worried that I might find I prefer women to men if I try it although he wouldn't hold me back because of that. Hubby ultimately said if I want to swing on my own he would support that. I felt my love for him explode to new heights that he trusted me so much but at the same time I was so bummed he didn't want to partake too! He felt I would probably have a more fruitful experience without him anyway since 4 way chemistry is hard to come by and no one should have to "take one for the team." He also said it would ruin the experience for me if I knew he was getting sidelined as that happened to his friend. Has what I described happened to any of the guys out there? How did you deal with it? How did the ladies handle it?
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