Jump to content

Mr_Qubic

Registered
  • Content Count

    12
  • Joined

Community Reputation

15 Good

About Mr_Qubic

  • Rank
    Contributor
  • Birthday 12/09/1958

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    M
  • Location
    Fairfield, CA
  • Occupation
    Writer, blogger, voice actor
  • Swinging Experience
    Before leaving the swing in 2008, about three years.
  • Anniversary
    xx/xx/xxxx
  1. Thank you all, very much. You have actually helped a great deal; the deafening silence from California folks tells me I'm right about the shallowness of my home state's scene. No one has stepped up to defend or refute. You see, my partner and I were in the lifestyle from late 2005 until Halloween night, 2008. I would estimate that in over 80% of our experiences, we, either individually or as a couple, were shunned, slammed, and outright humiliated by the people we encountered time and time again. Most of those experiences were in Sacramento, and a few were the San Francisco Bay Area. I have no clue what it was that made that the rule instead of the exception (as so many have claimed it is). We believe ourselves to be attractive, witty, funny, affable and genial. We don't, however, meet the ridiculous standards of ideal "beauty" fobbed off on the body politic of America today. Thus, we had a very rough time of it; those we sought out rarely accepted our invitations, and those who accepted were uncouth, a little sociopathic, or old enough to be my partner's father and she ain't got daddy issues. I, for one, am not the type to slink back to his rut and accept someone else's flawed judgment. I happen to like myself and I won't be told I'm undesirable. I write a blog on a sex-positive website that points out the lesser angels of the California lifestyle. I know that won't do much to win friends and influence people, yet someone has to call it out. If a group wants to hold itself out as a cutting-edge progressive community which challenges the norms and paradigms of "normal" culture, then it has no call to still adhere to "normal" culture's parameters. I know; that last paragraph sounded weird. Thing is, I've been poking my head back into the sex-positive set, and little has changed in four years. That's why I'm asking.
  2. Here's a couple more for you all: On the whole, in a typical California swinger group, how old is "too old?" Also: a Facebook friend of mine "confirmed" that in any swinger community, size indeed matters, because of the "filling feeling" (her words, folks) and other pleasantness involved (and she is around 5' tall). She also mentioned a rule of "thumb" that says if a man's dick does not extend past the plane of his abdomen, he's S.O.L. In all truth: Is she right? Should average cocks not even bother? Is body shaving (as well as genital shaving) a hard and fast rule? Is the swinger population decreasing as a result of what seems to be more "demand" for a particular set of body parameters? Thanks for your feedback!
  3. I'm willing to admit that (a) we quite likely just chose the wrong establishments w/o knowing the agenda, hidden or otherwise, and (b) I was probably unknowningly emitting some kind of vibe that repelled instead of attracted. I had serious body-image issues back then, and wasn't happy with the fact that my partner was having all the fun and the other participants treated me like shit, but that's a tale for another time and thread.
  4. It seems VERY prevalent in California. A non-judgmental swing group/club/venue appears to be the exception instead of the rule.My lady and I were bluntly (and rather coldly) turned away from three house-party groups on SLS on the basis of our size, and a club in San Francisco goes out of its way on its website to claim that their pre-screened invitees ensure partygoers that only "upscale, fit, and attractive" people need apply. Other groups and couples would meet us and you could see the disappointmenmt on their faces. Needless to say (but hell, I'll say it anyway), we won't be approaching those entities anytime in the future---but the sex-positive community needs to wake up and smell the fact that life is NOT a porn video, and most participants aren't model-perfect. //end rant
  5. A follow-up: If it was "HWP or don't bother attending," then what? How do you define "HWP?"
  6. A friend of mine, who once was very active in the Sacramento, CA lifestyle, once pointed out that the West Coast swinging community was more clique-ish, more HWP-centric, and more snobby than the East Coast swingers. I've never fucked anyone on the East Coast myself, so my question is: Is she correct?
×
×
  • Create New...