Swingoneway

Yeah, you are thinking too much into it. My morals are very much like yours. My wife, while admitting these activities sound fun, also admits to having some lingering moral issues. Her parents were rather conservative, shes trying to shed that mold though.

As much fun as those places sound, it will be years before I can just toss that kind of money. Kids put a hell of a kink in the wallet.

I'm cool with not playing with a woman. I get turned on seeing her getting pleasured, and by having someone watch us have sex. As far as the webcam thing, yeah I know, the pool is small for couples. However, we've "performed" for a guy or two, and enjoyed it...my wife loves watching them masturbate to us

I've heard of soft swapping, but this feels more like an ultra-light kind of thing! My wife and I have talked a lot about swinging and other "swingish" activities. In the relationship, I'm the crazy one; willing to try new things, open minded, morally free (I have morals, they just don't sway me that much) She's the conservative one; happy with more vanilla things, has more moral guidance than I do, but has a wild imagination. Through lots of talking (and a couple *ahem* disagreements) I think we've pegged down what we (okay, the limits are hers, I'm the crazy one) comfortable with. 1. No swapping. 2. Sex in same room with another couple would be fine, being naked, etc. Just no cross touching. 3. Sex online for others to watch sounds exciting. (though difficult, see below) 4. She's free to flirt, play with, and / or screw my guy friend (he's single and they've messed around before) Now here comes the parts I'd like advice with. First, we find the idea of having sex on camera to be thrilling. Problem is, most webcam sites (chatroulette, etc) have rules against such things, not to mention minors. What are our options there? Also, she gave me permission to go to strip clubs by myself. She's never given permission for anything like that ever...she's very possessive of me. She says she would try going with me, but likely sit in a dark corner and try to hide. Should I take her, go by myself (more likely with my friend) or just avoid it altogether?

Before anyone else jumps in here and mentions that I just suddenly pushed this idea on him, we've had sex with him before. He's not a complete newbie here. That's why it caught me as odd...we've been there, done that, and now he's declining. I'm not looking for a reason, he already gave me one. His life is a bitch, I respect his decision.

Well, we almost got our guy friend over last night. I talked to him, invited him over, made it clear what my wife's intentions were (she asked me to invite him over for play, caught me off guard )and he said he'd call me back when he figured out what he was doing (he had just got out of work when I called). A couple hours later and no call, I texted him asking if he was stopping by. He declined! I've never seen this guy turn down any attention from my wife in the past, but he claimed to have "a lot flying at me right now" and needed to get things sorted out. Granted, the guy doesn't have an easy life...two kids, divorced (ex-wife has custody), low paying job...but still, he turned down sex. Blew me away.

Agreed. I've read the forums here plenty, and I see the risks. I'm open to meeting people, she is shy to the point of almost being anti-social. Makes it hard to even suggest meeting people...you should see her face when I mention it. So, she wants to stick to friends, but as I told her, we could alienate what friends she has (there aren't many, she's selective)

So my wife and I are considering the lifestyle, and we've been discussing what she's comfortable with. She's stated that she'd be uncomfortable with playing with anyone she just met...she wants to get to know people, perhaps over the space of months (!) before she plays. Obviously, there's potential for patience issues there. She did mention she has friends she is interested in (male and female), but we don't know if they are vanilla, bi, etc. How would we find out without "outing" ourselves, so to speak?

Oh I get what you mean. From my point of view, my wife is special in bed because of her experience with me. She knows my quirks, my reactions, what gets me going and how to drive me nuts. Another woman wouldn't know those things, and I would likely choose to keep certain things special to just my wife and I. The feeling of a pussy is good, but generally speaking the same from woman to woman for an average sized guy unless they are doing something else. For example, my wife occasionally does something special right at the point when I'm about to get off that I'm sure another woman could duplicate, but not as well as my wife. The timing might be off, or the sensation different. Consider the entire act from first touch until the last, not just the part where he's thrusting in you.

I can vouch for this. I am an average guy myself, and unless a girl is extremely tight to the point of being painful (been there) I really can't feel a difference. I assume I would be able to tell if a girl was extremely loose as well, but I've never been in that situation.