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SexyRedmondCpl

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  • Content Count

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SexyRedmondCpl last won the day on June 17 2018

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About SexyRedmondCpl

  • Rank
    100 Posts Club
  • Birthday 07/23/1982

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Couple
  • Location
    Chattanooga, TN
  • Interests
    Anything active. Tennis, SUP, running, hang gliding. And, obviously, sex.
  • Swinging Experience
    Since November 2007
  • Anniversary
    2005

Swinger Info

  • SLS Name
    MuseAndHerArtist
  • Favorite Club(s)
    New Horizons

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  1. Oh, no sorry. I obviously didn't phrase that well. We definitely talk about sex, both desires and what's not allowed. That comment was in reference to the STI conversation. Most people say they're tested, and there's an implication that they're negative, but they never say so explicitly which I suppose we should as well.
  2. We're definitely chatty about it, usually. I've never seen anything like the rules you're describing. Could it be that the club isn't fully its own facility and some areas are shared with muggles? As for when and how these podcasters seem to have a very thorough post on their blog: https://lifeerotique.com/discuss-rules-boundaries-status-new-partners/ It's aimed a bit at beginners in my opinion but I don't disagree with anything they've said. The testing status thing is definitely less common than they make it sound though. I feel like more people should be talking about it but I don't remember more than a few people we've played with volunteering that info. Maybe we shouldn't be so trusting
  3. Ditto all of the above. When we lived in Boston, the closest on prem club was Choice. There are some M&Gs and off prem clubs that meet toward Plymouth and the cape, too, but we never went to be able to recall names.
  4. This exactly. We have a few vanill-ish friends who know. And a cousin who may or may not know, having somehow found our couple's Twitter (no real names, but the picture's us). Otherwise, yeah, rather not justify our choices.
  5. So far, she tells me it's been completely normal at work. Very much a, "let's just pretend this never happened," thing right now.
  6. And, based on that message, it took a comically short amount of time.
  7. Trapeze is totally safe. Lots of non-participating staff and security, and the club is located in a pretty comfortable part of town. The food is actually pretty good, with dinner as you arrive and breakfast at midnight. If you never leave the front, it's basically just a dance club. If you go in the back area, you must be nude or in a towel. Even in the back areas there were definitely couples who were there only as exhibitionists or voyeurs. At the same time it's definitely a swing club, so expect to be approached. A simple, "No thanks. We're not playing tonight." should suffice when you are. And go on a Saturday. Single men aren't allowed, which should cut down on some of that noise.
  8. We decided to check out a hotel party near us last Saturday. It was a new group, so we didn't really know what to expect. I'll tell you what we didn't expect, though... We're standing in line at the bar right after we arrive. The host comes over and introduces himself. "Hey. I'm so-and-so. I'm the host." Then, from behind me my wife says, "Oh, this is awkward." Awkward? He's confused. I'm confused. Until... I turn around to see her standing right in front of her boss. Well, we're all adults. We're all there for the same thing. So we acknowledged the awkwardness, exchanged brief small talk, then all went about enjoying the party. Separately. Some bridges you don't cross. The first time in 10 years of swinging that we've ever run into someone we know in vanilla life. Frankly, I can't believe it didn't happen sooner. So, I guess it does actually happen.
  9. This is right on the money. We've had too many of those moments where we're reaching the end of a first date and someone says, "so, do you want to play?" I mean, I know whether *I* want to but, short of both of us disappearing to the bathroom to talk about it, I've got no idea what she's thinking. It seems a bit rude to have that conversation right in front of the other couple. "Well, what do you think hun?" "I like her/him well enough, but (s)he's just a little too [reason for being disinterested] for my taste." "Hmm, yeah. I guess I can see that. Huh. They look a little offended. Do you think they can hear us?" "Well they are sitting right there, so..."
  10. Even if you are over 26, the vaccine is still effective. My PCP recommended it for both of us when I first told him we were non-monogamous. The way he explained it, the FDA recommended cutoff of 26 is based on the idea that you're done with risky sex by that age. Of course, since it's off-label use if you're above that age, insurance won't cover it but we still considered it worth the investment - lower the risk for us and any future partners, since HPV is quite often asymptomatic in men.
  11. Years ago, we had a date set with a lovely young woman who we were going to take to dinner, then the club for some fun. The day before, she sent us a message that she had suddenly fallen in love with a blind date she'd met the night before. We figured she was just being flaky, but it's a hazard of the lifestyle so why let it ruin our fun. When we arrived at the restaurant that next night, she'd called ahead and had a bottle of champagne waiting with an apology for not being able to join us. Never did hear from her after that. We both hope she's happy and doing well, though.
  12. Napoleon is right. It's very much on a night-by-night, couple-by-couple basis. Our evenings are generally long on foreplay with a single couple, but we've played in groups or (independently) with multiple couples in a night if the mood is right and we find folks we click with. The great thing about the lifestyle is that there's almost always someone out there who wants the same thing you do.
  13. Thank you! Yeah, I'm sure there's a scene here. I guess we're used to it being a bit more overt and hyperlocal. SLS events feel like a graveyard until you expand out to ATL and Nashville. We have been out to Menages, but it's more of a commitment than we're comfortable with on the regular. Still, all great advice. Much obliged. It may be that we ultimately end up starting our own local meet and greet while we wait for local events to pop. If you're not part of the solution, right?
  14. We couldn't decide where this post should live, so we decided it was a cry for help more than anything. We're a pair of nomads whose travels have taken us out of the big cities (Boston, Seattle) to... well, they call Chattanooga a city, but it's much, much smaller than we're used to. Since we moved to our new southern home we've had a heck of a dry spell. More than that, we're mourning the loss of the friends and communities we had in our old homes. So, the question is twofold: How do you start building (lifestyle) community in a new city? And where do you all meet folks when there's not much nearby?
  15. We keep our face pics in a private gallery, but we will share them with folks we reach out to. We've never encountered an issue in the (geez!) 10 years now we've been doing this. Our take is that anyone we contact has as much to lose by revealing they were on a swingers site as we do if outed.
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