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transplantdbrit

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    25
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15 Good

About transplantdbrit

  • Rank
    Contributor
  • Birthday 10/10/1974

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    couple/female half
  • Location
    kissimmee, florida
  • Occupation
    registered nurse
  • Swinging Experience
    10 years

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  1. Hello everyone I thought I might add a little to this topic. It was previously mentioned that a spouse has a sensitivity to latex. This is entirely common for we ladies. Many of us are prone to yeast infections that condom use causes. While personally I don't suffer from this, my gf does. In our lifestyle, a certain amount of risk is present. You can glove it, cover it in jelly, and pull it out...risk is still present. I have found that with some of the couples we have fun with, the Mr side isn't comfortable (mr wiggly loses his steam) with condoms. When this has happened, we slow things down and get to know them more before any more play happens. It was a bit odd to stop mid-play, but my life is absolutely worth an awkward moment or two. If we are comfortable at a later date, we resume play. Instead of using condoms, I use a jelly (after any and all oral play is done) to stop little swimmers and possible STD's in their tracks. The gentleman also utilizes withdrawl method. Sure it can change the mood for about 2 minutes to stop and apply, but like Loreal says, I'm worth it. If using a gel containing Nonoxyl 9, there isn't much that will get past that. Okay, I'm done adding my 2 cents worth. I just thought I might add another method that works quite effectively and without the use of a condom. Transplantdbrit.
  2. Mrs is 32 and Mr is 38 Married for 14....got married 6 months after we met...guess we were right after all :rollseyes
  3. Oh yes, I'm all for the "ick" response. Never in all the years we have been swinging have we run across anything quite like what you did. Now there were a couple of times that we felt uncomfortable in certain surroundings, but the best remedy was to just duck out of there. As far as drug use, I can't say we have run across that either, and the kid thing scares the hell out of me to be honest. I would have run for the proverbial hills!!! Don't let this experience spoil the entire experience that the lifestyle has to offer. Just look at the responses you have about this issue, and you will see that it is NOT the normal and highly frowned upon by everyone that posted. Take care. Transplantdbrit.
  4. Hello everyone, I see that it seems I am still a troll. Oh well I guess. For the member that has slammed me for using the "C" word. Honestly, shame on you. I survived 13 months of chemotherapy, and 130 rads of radiation weekly to make it. Going to the NIH here is the US was no picnic, but they did the job and I'm still kicking. If you would care to actually see the person you are slamming, I will be happy to let you. I can show you the before, during and after photos of myself if you'd like. As far as your personal take on my current situation, you have offered absolutely no help. Many other have, but you have been abusive and tasteless. By the by, the gf in question has started her monthly. I have said my part to her and have bidden her goodbye. My hubby is in the dog house, but we have come through so much during the course of our marriage, and will surely work through this too. To everyone that offered perspective on my topic, thank you. It has been received with much gratitude. Now moderator, please close this thread as it is now pointless. Once things are worked out here, I will possibly be back to join in discussions of a much happier nature. Until then, take care of yourselves and each other. Regards, Transplantdbrit (Catie)
  5. Okay everyone, let's not all get nasty. Personally I think we're all grown up enough to not dig out anyone's eyes. This message board is for those in the lifestyle and the issues, both positive and negative, that come up. I can handle someone thinking I'm a troll. The case is that I'm not, but it will never make any difference to someone that has their mind already decided. The last thing I want is for a difference of opinion to result in a written knock-down, drag out fight on a message board that is supposed to be an electronic safe-haven for adult friends. For those that have given wonderful points of view and great advice, thank you. For the others that think I'm sucking the life out of the universe, you have the right to your opinion. Personally, I am sorry you think this of me. There is no need to further this topic as it seems to create anger. Take a deep breath and make nice. In my defense, I'm sorry that I was not a member of this forum before now. If this were the case, there wouldn't be the bashing.
  6. Wow...you are quite harsh. At least you're literate. Sorry you have so little faith in others. You must have been really snowed by someone in the past. I will admit it is odd to have people you have never met verbally bash you for doing nothing wrong.
  7. She said she was going to take one but didn't. I said I would purchase it and she said okay. I have it, but she has not come over to take it. To answer the hubby question, no she is single.
  8. Hello everyone. To answer the question of where I'm from. I was born in Oxford, raised in Brackley. Now on to the subject at hand. For those of you that have deemed me a "troll". I can honestly say that I am not. I now realize that first posts asking for advice in highly emotional situations are not viewed well by many of the long-term members. Before now, I never had need for input from strangers on my marital situation. Of course to become a member to this board might have been quite a bit of fun, not to mention a place to meet other couples. As it is now, I am turning to all of you as like-minded adults, for some advice on my situation. I do realize this is a bit soap-operaish, but genuine never-the-less. I have read everything all have had to say. For those that gave some good ideas and insights, thank you. For everyone else, I'm sorry that you have come by some with less than honorable posts. Play devil's advocate if you must. If you have something to offer, please by all means tell me. As things stand at home right now, my hubby and I have had some communication. He explained himself and I listened. As far as my gf goes, she called me yesterday, but not much was said. I'm not sure what to say to her. I know I can forgive them both, and screw-ups are all a part of the human condition. I just have to wait things out to see if she is expecting. Yes, for the person that said it wouldn't be the child's fault, I whole heartedly agree. Also yes, his chance to be a father is valid too. My husband loves me and does not want me to leave. I love him and don't want to leave. We must all hope for the best, but prepare for the worst in life. Unfortunately, I'm not sure which scenario fits which bill. I don't want to be selfish and hope for no baby, but I can't help but feel jealous at the thought of her giving birth to his baby. I have been doing quite a bit of soul searching about how I would honestly react to the latter. Unfortunately, I have it in me to have a marriage with swinging, but NOT for a true poly-amorous blended family. While sitting here writing my thoughts to all of you, it seems I have solved a bit of my own problem. Now to wait and see what comes. That will determine my next step. Thank you for the many insights, and I will post the outcome.
  9. Good point. I had actually thought of that. I realize it isn't conventional, but it might work. I'll pick up that book you suggested and have a good read. It will give me more productive food for thought. Thanks for everything.
  10. OMG! I can't believe you are actually considering that I have made this up! Yes I stay at home and take care of things, no I am not bored and needing to fill up the time in my day. The entire reason I posted to this particular forum was because it was the one that came up on Google. As far as my lifestyle and the subjects that arise from it, I figured that many like-minded couples would have some wise advice for me in my current situation. Thank you very much for your input, but you are very wrong indeed. Now, if you don't mind...have you any constructive advice for me?
  11. Thank you so much for your kind words. To answer a question both of you have asked, yes I have spoken to my husband about it. His reply to not telling me was that he felt very badly at what he had done. Evidently he actually left our bed once the deed was concluded and didn't come back to sleep. I honestly believe him and that fact that it was just a mistake that isn't likely to ever happen again. Unfortunately, it seems my gf may indeed be expecting. Her period is due to start Thursday, but she has been feeling very green for a couple of days now. There are other symptoms of pg as well. I'm nervous and seem to be unable to just move past this right now. Thursday can't get here fast enough! I told her to go the the store and get one of those early (5 days before your period) tests. She is going to but she has said that she is fairly sure she already knows what the result will be, as she already has one child. Honestly, the timing was just too perfect. If she is the woman to give him a child and not me, what the hell do I do? I could not continue my marriage and I know this. The insult would be too great. Could somone please smack me up-side of my head and make me cheer up a tad? My husband has not been reacting very well to my emotions. There have been some very ugly words between us. I have never felt this way, and now I understand why the little green-headed monster can be so strong. Jealousy was never a part of my nature before now and it is throwing me for a loop.
  12. Hello everyone. I'm new to the board, but not the lifestyle. My hubby and I have been swinging off and on for about 10 years. It has always been a wonderful experience for both of us. That is until now. We have always had our rules firmly put down, and neither of us broke any of them. Not even stretched them to be honest. You know, same room, full swap okay, singles okay...yadda yadda yadda. For us absolutely no secrecy. Always together and involved. Unfortunately this has now changed. A couple of weeks ago my husband made a huge mistake with a girlfriend of mine that we had had some fun with numerous times before. Now, we have taken a break from male partners or couples because we are/were trying to add to our family. I did become pregnant, but unfortunately lost the pregnancy at just shy of 6 weeks. The miscarriage happened on Monday two weeks ago. My girlfriend came over to hold my hand while I cried and to let me blather on and try to feel better. That night we were sitting on our bed and I had another good cry with my hubby and girlfriend present. I had taken a RX pain pill and it knocked me out after that. We're talking a tornado couldn't have woken me! Unfortunately sometime around 2am my husband and my girlfriend had sex in my bed with me out like a light. To make matters worse, no condom was used and she was ovulating. Now, we also have the condom rule in our swinging (before anyone asks). The next morning I actually said thank you to my hubby for understanding my feelings and not doing anything last night. How foolish I feel right now!!! Honestly, I did make myself very clear where I stood as far as fun went, especially on that particular night considering what had happened. My husband didn't bother to say anything to me about his activities. Three days went by and I was talking to my girlfriend on the phone. She told me like it was some big joke. The "oh gee..hahaha...I thought he would have had sense enough to pull out". I asked her to please clarify what she was telling me. She did and I was completely stunned. So much so that I actually fell down. So not only did they have no regard for my feelings about losing the baby, they risked her becoming pregnant. I have no idea how I am supposed to feel right now. Sometimes I think I'm okay and can get through this. Other times I want to scream. You see, the reason we are having such a difficult time having a baby is because I am a cancer survivor. It's a miracle I was able to become pregnant in the first place. I guess I felt the loss more than he did. Her period is due this week. If she is expecting, I think I might actually go crazy. Please help me...someone...anyone! I don't care if you have to tell me to do a back-bend and say Buddhist chants. I will take any and all advice to heart. Thanks in advance and I'm sorry this is so darn long.
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