Jump to content

knottyboi

Registered
  • Content Count

    12
  • Joined

Community Reputation

15 Good

About knottyboi

  • Rank
    Contributor

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Single female
  • Location
    Kentucky
  • Occupation
    Student
  • Swinging Experience
    beginner

Swinger Info

  • SLS Name
    knottyboi

Recent Profile Visitors

The recent visitors block is disabled and is not being shown to other users.

  1. I can't tell you all how much your support means to me. I was feeling like a "bad swinger" because I didn't just go with it, and I coudn't understand why I was feeling so terrible about myself. I *did* tell them both twice I wasn't interested and I said "no" very clearly. I didn't beat around the bush about it. So that's why it was even worse when one of them came a hair's breath from going inside me - it was such a surprise and so very unwelcome. The hostess did end up apologizing to me later because she knew all of us but not them, they had been vouched for by other friends of hers that didn't end up coming to the room. It was hard to hear that some of you think that it pretty much was to be expected, that that is what group sex is about, but I can't believe that. I've been in a few groups before and it was always very respectful, always with each person either asking out loud if it was okay, or approaching each other in a slow way to give a person a chance to say no. I've never been made to feel like a whore. I appreciate your kind words and it's helped that one man that was there wrote me and said that he was unhappy with what had happened but that he thinks I handled it really well, and this all has made me feel so much better.
  2. Southbound, I'd hate to have this keep me from swinging, that's why I wanted to get advice on how to get past it. I really enjoy swinging and have had all positive experiences up until now, and I go to the club about every other week. I don't really want to take a vacation, I want to learn how to not let this affect my future swinging experiences. Cpl2share - you're right. I should be grateful that for the past six months all I've had is the peach! Maybe that's why this is affecting me so strongly. Up until now, it's all been happy and rainbows and sparkles.
  3. I'm having a bad emotional reaction to a terrible swinging experience I had several days ago and I need some advice on how to get over it. I apologize for the long post... I had gone to a hotel party (my first one) and I was having a blast. I knew several people there, everyone was super friendly, it was going great. I was invited back to the hotel room of a couple I knew, along with several other couples and two single guys. I'm married but I play as a single female since my partner doesn't play. So, I'd say there were eleven of us. All of us invited were invited because of the expectation that we were all a little freaky, we all liked each other, and there wouldn't be any problems mixin'n'matchin'. And it's true, I liked everyone there, though I didn't know the two single men. So I was fine with having fun with all parties, especially as I had already swung with a few of them. Now, problems for me developed when, as soon as the clothes came off, the couples started swapping, leaving me out cold with the two men I didn't know. They seemed fine, but they quickly became EXTREMELY pushy. There was no friendly foreplay, or asking me what I like, or anything like that. It was like they had paid an entrance fee and, dammit, they were going to get some no matter what. I was a little drunk, so I wasn't as forceful as I normally would be, but I *did* say NO several times, as well as saying, "I'm sorry, but I'm not comfortable with this, I don't want to, no thanks." But it was like every time I turned around, a dick was in my face. I got up and went to the bathroom just to get some breathing space, and as soon as I came out, one of them tried to convince me to fuck him against the bathroom door. I said, no, and walked away. I finally went over to the bed and squished in with two of the couples, who were more than happy for me to do so. I bent over and started going down on one man, when all of a sudden, I felt a dick trying to enter me. WHAT?? I whipped around to see the other single guy nonchalantly trying to fuck me, with NO condom on (despite my earlier stating that I don't fuck without them), and he acted like I was ridiculous when I became furious. I had very clearly told him I wasn't interested three times before that. At that point, everyone else realized the problems I was having, and the two single guys were made to leave, and my night significantly improved. But I can't get it out of my mind and it's making me sick to my stomach. I feel like I was almost raped and that pisses me off to no end. I gave this man no suggestion that I wanted to do it with him, I was very clear in saying no, and he was going to do it anyway. What's worse is that I am white-looking and the two men were black. Apparently (out of my hearing) they were bitching that I wouldn't fuck them because they were black, and this was insane because this group of people was very evenly divided between black people and white people, and I had had sex with two of those other black people on a previous occasion. I am NOT racist, and the color of your skin is pretty much on the bottom of my list of preferences that I have. I'm so tired of the view that as a single young bisexual woman, I've got it made. When, in fact, it's extremely stressful, and I get so much pressure, and so many couples and single men act like it's almost an obligation for me to do it with them if many other people are already matched up. It's like I'm an object. The 'unicorn' syndrome sucks real bad for me, since it doesn't matter who I am as a person, I'm just a walking bisexual vagina here to fulfill fantasies. ARGH! I'm sorry for the hatefulness of this, I just can't get over that night and I need help on how to get over it. For those that have had this sort of thing happen to them, how do you cope? I obviously can't explain it to vanillas, since they would simply say that I shouldn't have been doing that sort of thing in the first place.
  4. Personally, he sounds like a dick. Why should he go "first" anyway? Maybe he should get his FMF with two other women and you should get your MFM with two other men, especially if neither one of you want the arrangement the other is desiring. Also, as a person who thinks butches are hot, that's damned insulting that he says you are too insecure to actually attract hot women. In my experience, it takes a lot more self-confidence to actually go after those butch women (and all butch women aren't the stereotypical mullet and flannel-wearing rednecks!) than straight-looking feminine Barbies.
  5. Thanks for the advice, everyone. I really appreciate it. LMF2, I'm glad you can empathize! Dynamar, you said what I was feeling - I don't want to feel like their personal girlfriend/concubine. I want to SWING and have lots of partners. I did like being with them and want to do it again, but I don't want to feel like I *have* to. Thanks for your perspective, Alura. I wouldn't want to have to start all over again once I found something I had been looking for over a long period of time - but I also wouldn't want to scare them off! It hasn't gotten to that point, which is why I came here for help. They did write me again this morning (in response to an e-mail of mine) and they did mention that they didn't want to be pushy, so hopefully this will resolve itself without bad feelings.
  6. I'm very new to the swinger scene and I need some advice. Just a few weeks ago I met a nice couple (I'm a single female) and last weekend we hooked up. It was great and I really enjoyed myself. We had been e-mailing back and forth before that a few times, but ever since we had sex, they have been e-mailing me almost every day and if I don't write back quickly, they will write within a few hours and ask if I got their previous e-mail. All of a sudden I feel very pressured and while I did want to get back together, now I'm afraid that if I did, the need for constant communication and attention would only escalate. I know that many people that are swingers do want to be friends with the people they swing with - but to be completely honest, I don't. I want to be friendly, like each other, and talk a few times, but other than that, I just want to have a stress-free, no emotional ties, sexual good time. If I wanted the stress and emotional ties, I would find a polyamorous partner. I am flattered that they had such a blast with me that they want to do it again ASAP, but now I feel pestered and what was fun is now becoming rapidly unfun. This is the first couple I've been with and I don't really know how to handle it correctly. (I apologize if this shows up twice, I accidentally posted this once before I logged in).
×
×
  • Create New...