How much should a gal trust a statement, "I'm fixed?"

The question came into my mind while reading in a different forum. What if a guy tells you that he's safe owing to the fact that he's had a vasectomy? Should you still ask him to put the condom on? Another question. Is it bad form or simply having no good purpose to state in your on-line profile that you are vasectomy-safe?

Firstly, and to my mind most important, vasectomy does nothing whatsoever to prevent STIs. Condoms do.

Secondly, even vasectomy is not a guarantee of infertility. The procedure can be done incorrectly. The body can even heal.

Finally, anyone can say they've had a vasectomy, but unless you're examining them for surgical scars (and even then) do you really know they are telling the truth?

When we play with others, condoms are a 100% absolute, unwavering requirement.

Never, ever feel hesitant to ask someone to use a condom. It doesn't matter if the guy is actually fixed -- if you feel more comfortable using a condom, you're entitled to that right.

In previous discussions on the Swingers Board, it has been mentioned that saying you've had a vasectomy may be code for, "It's safe to go bareback with me." Still, it's not necessarily bad form to mention a vasectomy on an online profile. If condoms are the only form of birth control used by the lady, then she may feel safer knowing that an accidental pregnancy is less likely to happen.

Define 'safe'

Given that for many pregnancy may be the highest risk "STI", and since condoms do break occasionally, then being v-safe may be a nice thing to know.

However, having a vasectomy doesn't protect (either party) against any of those pesky "real" STIs. So, I'm not sure we'd really care too much about the 'fixed' status of male playmates (though that may be informed by our particular details - see below).

I've had a vasectomy, Ms A is post-menopausal. Our risk aware sex protocols still demand condom use for penetrative sex.

D

As a gal, I don't put much faith into the statement. We always play with condoms to minimize the risk of STIs so it doesn't matter if they are "fixed". We've been asked if we're "fixed" and the next question is usually, "Do you play bareback?" So, we don't put in our profile that we're both fixed nor do we make it known that we are. As I mentioned in another thread, we don't put in any form "fixed" or "surgically safe" in our profile because it doesn't matter since we still play with condoms and we don't want others to ask why we play with condoms when we're "fixed" or try to convince us to play bareback.

And as mentioned before me, they could be lying about being "fixed". It's just a lot more simpler to not mention it and state upfront that we're a condom-only couple.

The way the fertility situation and when we started swinging fell out, it never was much of a concern for us. I could see though that if one was swinging when the pregnancy potential was still very much an issue, then being with someone who was v-safe on top of using condoms would provide some extra peace of mind, and is probably worth putting in a profile just for that reason.

If we were in that situation, would we 100% trust what they said? No. But, given the odds are they were telling the truth to start with, then that would be a little extra comfort because as we all know, condoms aren't foolproof and can slip off and/or break.

The way the fertility situation and when we started swinging fell out, it never was much of a concern for us. I could see though that if one was swinging when the pregnancy potential was still very much an issue, then being with someone who was v-safe on top of using condoms would provide some extra peace of mind, and is probably worth putting in a profile just for that reason.

 

If we were in that situation, would we 100% trust what they said? No. But, given the odds are they were telling the truth to start with, then that would be a little extra comfort because as we all know, condoms aren't foolproof and can slip off and/or break.

Thanks for reminding me of how it was when we first started swinging. We were in that predicament and decided to take matters into our own hands and get fixed. Family members weren't sure why we were both getting sterilized but we didn't want to put that "extra comfort" in someone else's hands when we could do it ourselves.

Thanks for reminding me of how it was when we first started swinging. We were in that predicament and decided to take matters into our own hands and get fixed. Family members weren't sure why we were both getting sterilized but we didn't want to put that "extra comfort" in someone else's hands when we could do it ourselves.

We did the same. We still always use condoms for intercourse for sti prevention. We don't tell someone that we've had surgical birth control unless a condom fails.

In my case, shaved, the two white X's are clearly visible and I had a 10 year check. I guess the 10 year check has to be on faith.

Thanks for reminding me of how it was when we first started swinging. We were in that predicament and decided to take matters into our own hands and get fixed. Family members weren't sure why we were both getting sterilized but we didn't want to put that "extra comfort" in someone else's hands when we could do it ourselves.

Why not both get sterilized. Isn't that fair. Why should only one partner do it. That would be my response.

For us it isn't about if we trust them when they say they are fixed! We really don't care, because regardless if we are playing with someone other then each other condoms are going to be used. Being fixed is not going to make anyone safer when it comes to STI's.

When we see it stated on a profile we assume it is there, because the person is hoping it will get them play without condoms! It isn't going to put them higher up on the list of possible play partners with us anymore then the guys that list they are heavy cummers.

I'd guess a woman should trust this statement about as much as she would trust a rattlesnake who says, "I've been defanged."