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ricndi032903

Did you have to talk your wife into swinging?

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ok guys, be honest......

 

How many of the husbands or men on this site actually

had to "talk" their wives or women in to this lifestyle???

 

And how many had the respect to say; "ok she doesn't want it, I can live with that" and just let the idea stay a fantacy.

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There was no convincing needed and we never really had to "discuss" it. We just knew each other very well before we even married. We've been swinging for two years and have actually become closer because of it. Shannon, and I, know that WE are the most important people to each other. We have talked about it from time to time, but simply to address what each others fantasies are. We have a FEW close friends we swing with, and that's it. And we are all the best of friends. My love and feelings for my wife, and hers for me, are only enhanced by swinging.

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Nobody had to twist my arm...lol.

 

Once the subject was on the table that was it. We've been full force ever since.

 

Roxy :D

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I didn't have to twist my wife's arm at all. It was her idea and had to convince me and go at my tortoise speed.

 

In reference to ricndi032903's repeated inferences that swinging is causing problems in her marriage. It is her husbands obsession with swinging and not swinging itself that is the problem.

 

Just last night we were talking with friends about the failed marriage of a mutual acquaintance. The marriage ended because of the husband's obsession with fishing. It was the most important thing in his life and eventually ruined his marriage. This just goes to show that any activity, no matter how socially acceptable can be a problem.

 

Swinging isn't, and never has been ricndi032903's problem.

 

Jesse

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"For husbands or men"

 

Ummm, aren't they one in the same? Or, is there a difference between the two that I've not yet caught on to?

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I brought it up to my hubby. And after discussing it we both were for it! He was shocked that i brought it up but no one had to talk the other into it!!

 

my 2 cents for the day s

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Originally posted by ricndi032903

ok guys, be honest......

 

How many of the husbands or men on this site actually

had to "talk" their wives or women in to this lifestyle???

 

Notice how I completely ignored the male reference here. LOL.

 

Sounds like some of the women here know exactly what they want, not much convincing at all.

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There was no convincing from either of us. It's a fantasy that we shared together, and decided together to pursue. Every time we try something new sexually, we decide together. If one of us brings something up, and the other doesn't have an interest, it's dropped. Fortunately for us, we think very much alike most of the time, and find the same things exciting.

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Originally posted by OhioCouple

"For husbands or men"

 

Ummm, aren't they one in the same? Or, is there a difference between the two that I've not yet caught on to?

 

Husbands are not men. After they get married women own their manhood. They are still allowed at all the club meetings and special functions, but they don't have to pay dues anymore. We feel they've gone through the final rite of passage and we look to them as our leaders and for advice on what to do and not to do concerning women, finances, career, etc. Unfortunately, we sometimes listen to the husbands who tell us what we want to hear instead of the ones who tell us the truth, whatever that is at the moment.

 

As for the original question, I've NEVER asked a woman I was involved with if she would consider swinging. However, I have this irritating talent for attracting bisexual women (and lesbians, but thats another story) as girlfriends, so when talking about fantasies, multiple partners almost always come up and thats when I drop hints about swinging and start leaving old copies of Connections or Michigan Swingers in my magazine rack when she visits. Then, if she's interested, SHE'LL bring it up after a few weeks and I'll let her think she talked me into trying it for real.

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No convincing was needed. It came up in casually in our conversations and we've been enjoying it ever since. She had actually been in swinging situations before I met her and I had not, though I always wanted to.

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Guest Willbfun

Ok, I read several stories, and I have told my before. Our first time was just what happened.

 

We had been married about 10 years. And one night after being out dancing and having a few drinks. We ended up having full swing with long time friends. They later told us they were experienced. And I have to admit, they set us up good. If they planned it? Which we have always wondered. But we didn't care. We are still good friends. But after the first time we decided, it wasn't a good idea to mix friendship and swinging. Not when our kids went to school together. Plus the fact we live in a small community.

 

But later my wife and I talked it over and we both, wanted to try it again. And we don't regret it. I'm sure if more couples, got into it the way we did. There would be more couples in the life style. Plus we trust each other, and know we are soul mates.

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First we fantasized about it. Then we talked about it. Then we did it. Then we did it all over again ;)

 

No arm twisting needed. But lot's of discussion and discovery to find out what we liked and what we didn't.

 

Bob and Sandy

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Originally posted by bobandsandy

First we fantasized about it. Then we talked about it. Then we did it. Then we did it all over again ;)

 

No arm twisting needed. But lot's of discussion and discovery to find out what we liked and what we didn't.

 

Bob and Sandy

 

Ya What they said! :claps:

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Originally posted by ricndi032903

But since you've all made it clear that you do not want the non swingers and ones that find it difficult to understand why someone would venture into this when they have everything they need at home, I bid you a fine fairwell, I wish you all luck, hope you don't end in divorce court, or death row, I've learned all I care too, and your physical way of living isn't for me, my moral and conscience are way above your's, so you're right you are way out of my leage, I will have the life & dreams of having a happy, healthy, faithful marriage with one man, not 20. so clap you hands in joy. Good bye, and Hope you all have a Happy Holiday.

 

I guess we missed the point in the other thread. :confused:

 

And Mrs. O....

"For husbands or men"
...maybe she meant "For husbands or 'real' men." Just a thought...- EBF

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Originally posted by EternallySingle

Husbands are not men. After they get married women own their manhood. They are still allowed at all the club meetings and special functions, but they don't have to pay dues anymore. We feel they've gone through the final rite of passage and we look to them as our leaders and for advice on what to do and not to do concerning women, finances, career, etc. Unfortunately, we sometimes listen to the husbands who tell us what we want to hear instead of the ones who tell us the truth, whatever that is at the moment.

 

Your posts are brilliant and witty; something I rarely see on the Internet. I enjoy reading them. :cool:

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Originally posted by ricndi032903

ok guys, be honest......

 

How many of the husbands or men on this site actually

had to "talk" their wives or women in to this lifestyle???

 

And how many had the respect to say; "ok she doesn't want it, I can live with that" and just let the idea stay a fantacy.

 

 

I feel that if I had to "talk her into it" then she would be doing it for me and not for herself or us and I would never be comfortable with that type of relationship.

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Both of us were already in the Lifestyle when we met, and both of us were still in the Lifestyle when we became a couple several years later. It was simply understood that we would continue to do this, so we never even discussed it!

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