Any swinger latinos...

[Rosleenlove]

We are in chicago and curious about this lifestyle..but is harder to do it when you came from a latin family...any one has past this experience???

[couger84d]

Im a Hispanic M married to a Hispanic F and i dont find any problem going and doing what my wife and i do. well, plan on doing, anyways. I say this because it will be within the privacy of our home, and it will also be with someone that has no connection with anybody in my circle of friends or family. What you do behind closed doors, stays behind closed doors, unless you speak of it to anyone who wasn't invloved in the act.

[Rosleenlove]

Thas seem to be the easy way to do it ...but do you ever think what will happen if they find out???how you will respond...i know we are adults and adults do what they want but some times is hard to explain...

[girlsnboys]

I can somewhat see where you're coming from. I have a tight knit family, we live close by to eachother, hang out together frequently. I could see in some latin families if you're cousins are over a lot etc. that any new people entering your life would be questioned - because they care about who you're friends with or if they want to be nosey. The important thing you should focus on is your privacy with your husband, they should know there are certain times when you want to be together without family dropping in.

If you feel uncomfortable with that, you should only swing at clubs, or when you go on vacations. But seriously, its your life, and your relationship -- you should not be concerned with their approval. Where there's a will there's a way --- and if it seems such an obstacle, then maybe you're not ready.

[intuition897]

I agree with girlsnboys. Family is one thing, but marriage is quite another. Your family needs to understand that you and your husband need your privacy, and expect them to respect that. All they need to know is that you're dropping the kids off for a little weekend getaway (send them a hotel postcard & keep 'em happy :rollseyes ) and go somewhere out of state if necessary. Look up a good swinger's club and go for a night. I'll assume you both really want to give this a try, so try an on-premises club where they have a "playroom". If you're not interested in immediate playing, try an off-premises club where you can dance, flirt, and talk to other couples. Some people prefer this, actually, to playing on-site. In any case, as far as discretion goes, a club is going to be your best bet.

[Rosleenlove]

girlsnboys you make good point..thas what latin family do...(can be noisy) and as you might know doing this is a big...burnin hell deal....even knowing that we all have do it or think on doing it...for noe we have post pics of ourselves on the internet(redclouds.com) most of our family are not (no offense) smart enough to be online.but we want to do it all the way...but the preocupation still kicks...what if they find out...
we are sure that we are ready cause we have talk about it and we are willing to loose the family if they make a deal out of this...but you think they will understand???and if they do???how you think they will handle it ???

[intuition897]

I have heard some couples who have come right out to everyone about their swinging say that friends, co-workers, neighbours, etc. do not make a big deal of it. If their immediate family are older children (late teens and older) most have not had a problem with it.

I know my MOM would fly off the handle about it, think that she had failed in her duty as a parent, and would be horribly saddened thinking that Mr. intuition and I are Fed-Exing ourselves to hell. In order for her to understand our way of thinking, it would require her to completely reorder her beliefs. I can't ask her to do that just so that she'll be okay with my sex life. And I can't stand the idea of her agonizing over something that just isn't true, nor, to be honest, any of her business. So, we are discrete, and we insist that a certain level of privacy be respected by anyone we are NOT married to.

I understand that in some cultures, it's a kind of unwritten law: the marriage belongs to the wife, the husband....and their respective families...immediate and extended. I just personally don't adhere to it. I can only suggest that you decide where you both want to draw the line, draw it, and stick to it.

We don't hide this from our families out of shame, and we dislike being dishonest. But to go against what WE believe in just to make our families happy seems a greater crime. We are interested in pursuing the truth, and the truth is that swinging has allowed my husband and I to grow closer. And it has not harmed us, our playmates, nor anyone else. They just cannot see that. Their lives are complicated enough without having to worry about us.

[WesternSwing]

Originally Posted by Rosleenlove

We are in chicago and curious about this lifestyle..but is harder to do it when you came from a latin family...any one has past this experience???

Why would it be harder? I come from a large and tight Greek family and it hasn't been an issue, but then, they don't know either. But how would they find out unless one of them was looking on a swinger site?

Mrs. WS's dad knows... and he really doesn't care. We are happy and that is all that matters to him. My dad probably knows, and I have a step-brother and his wife that are poly... so no drama there. Now, if my extended Greek family knew? I don't know. But, the way we see it, it's our life, not theirs. If we live it their way, we'll be unhappy. If they can't accept us being happy the way we are then THEY have the problem, not us.

I'll pose this to our friends who are Latino and oh so delicious, facelick and get back with you.

Mr. WS

[Rosleenlove]

Honestly with no kid around...WesternSwing after seen big fat greek wedding movie..we realized that we have a lot of common with latin families in how close they are to us..and the meaning of that....like we said we are not afraid of the aftermath..we are more worried in they reaccion....

[Rosleenlove]

Western what's the best place to go in the chicago area...any recomendations??

[Rosleenlove]

oh and also you think that we will be welcome...

[WesternSwing]

Even with all the business travel for tradeshows and such, I haven't spent any time in Chicago clubs, so I really can't give you a recommendation there. I know every major U.S. city by night and the route from the airport, to my hotel, a restaurant or two, and to the convention center. But I can say that you would be more then welcome at any club. Don't fret it. facelick

Mr. WS

[Rosleenlove]

thank you

[Rosleenlove]

Anyone can tell me if the thumb ring really works???