What activities do you allow during swinging?

[Karen12345]

Hello,

while the poll should give some overview, i would like to know a little more on why couples exclude certain kinds of sex when swinging.

Is it the man or the woman, who would like to exclude intercourse/kissing as a rule (not just in an individual case)? Does the man not want his wife to have intercourse with/kiss another man? Or the other way around?

And why: jealousy? STDs? other fears? Did your rules change?

Karen

[Spoomonkey]

We have included it all. When we started, we had enough boundaries to confuse a map maker, but now the boundaries are few.

Spoomonkey

Dito to what Spoomonkey said. We had so many boudaries the first time or two we swung we didnt even understand them!!

But now there are few as we have gotten more comfortable. As long as we both agree with the couple/single male then its on.


Of course we do not allow anything that we dont even allow between each other.

[leftcoastcouple]

I marked "kissing + oral + intercourse," but only because the choice we'd pick as a couple--"kissing + intercourse"--wasn't offered.

I don't expect most folks to understand. But to answer your question as to why, Karen, Mrs. Leftcoast views oral sex as extremely personal and intimate, and while she's agreed to keep it off the "boundaries" list (which does include anal, but you didn't mention that), that was a compromise on her part. To her, oral is highly personal and more intimate than intercourse or even kissing.

I understand where she's coming from and respect it, just as I do folks who forbid kissing, even if I don't feel the same way. Different strokes--and boundaries--for different folks.

[good times]

I have to agree with spoo and the naughties. We have few limits. We firmly believe that the intimate part of our relationship is in our hearts and is not defined by something we do for fun or pleasure.

[Karen12345]

@ leftcoastcouple: Interesting - i have to admit that i did not expect the combination kissing and intercourse, but no oral... never heard of such a combination before. Let us see if i missed other combinations.

[xxoticangel]

Our sexual limits are simple, no kissing and no anal. The other rules are also few, only play together and must use condoms during intercourse.

Mrs. Leftcoast views oral sex as extremely personal and intimate, and while she's agreed to keep it off the "boundaries" list (which does include anal, but you didn't mention that), that was a compromise on her part. To her, oral is highly personal and more intimate than intercourse or even kissing.

Angel thought this way in the begining too. When we got together she had only preformed oral on two other men (her ex and one LTR) and the only one to oral on her was her ex. This despite having had 14 partners. Now one of her favorite activites is giving oral, especially the first time she taste a new playmate. She closes her eyes and gets this dreamy look on her face before savoring it like a gourmet meal. Don't know what happened to change her attitude but I ain't complaining.

As for kissing I didn't think anything about it until we talked after our first time. She didn't like seeing me kiss another woman and asked that I not do it anymore.

[Karen12345]

@ xxoticangel: is the "no kissing"-rule for both of you or is it ok for you if she kisses other men?

[xxoticangel]

@ xxoticangel: is the "no kissing"-rule for both of you or is it ok for you if she kisses other men?

The no-kissing rule is that I cannot kiss anyone but her and she cannot kiss anyone but me or the girl. Seems that while the other girl and I were kissing etc she and the guy were not. Neither of them liked it we talked about it and it became a rule.

In light of another topic regarding kissing she and I began talked about it again. Evidentley there are other couples that would not be interested in playing with us because we don't kiss. We decided to keep the rule.

[lovefest04]

We really try not to set any limits. I was taken back the first time I watched the other man (MFM get together) just sort of make his move on my wife. She responded with a deep tongue exploring kiss. After I recovered, I realized that if I couldn't take the kissing I'd better get out now.

She also made me feel great when she finished with the kiss and then came to me, wrapped her arms around me and kissed me. I reached down to find she was getting very wet. From then on I was clear on what we were doing and why.

Fun, fun and more fun. Oh and of course sexy orgasmic fun.

Steve

[akamgaxoxo]

I chose all of the above, mainly because I could not imagine not being able to do all of those things. However if one of us found that something bothered us about kissing or otherwise, we would surely stop that action right away.

[jessiecm]

we have already got past the limits, with time, let the goodtimes roll for all

[bear_and_babe]

I picked all of the above also. The only thing that I (Babe) will not do is anal. I have done it with a swing partner in the past, and enjoyed it, but it is not something that I want to do with other swing partners. Bear has been with woman who wanted him to do anal with them, and I feel that is their decision if they want that. I don't tell him he can't do it. I guess we are very open in what we do.

[flutterbudget]

When we started, we had rules also. Now we don't. The only condition is that we communicate and are honest and it is working out well (that's an understatement by the way! LOL).
flutter

[xxoticangel]

Since my last posting on this thread our rules have changed and we now allow kissing. Our rules are now down to three 1) same room 2) no anal 3) condoms during intercourse.