Is this a Breach of Trust?

[If_You_Please]

Would you find it violating at all if, in a published work of non-fiction, a former partner described playtimes/sex acts that you partook in while keeping your identity anonomous? (Obviously, without your knowledge.) If you found out about it, after the fact, what would your reaction be?

[VegasLee]

No, not at all.

They did not identify you at all so I don't see the problem here at all.

People talk about what they do here on these boards all the time but don't tell "who" and no one has a problem with it.

Keep life simple. Don't make more of things then need be.

[LFM2]

Regardless, of whether I knew about the book or not, if my identity is kept anonymous, go for it.

[two4youinswva]

As long as I get some input on the actor playing my part when the movie rights are sold, it's all good.

[The Fuse]

I would get a charge out of that, as long as there were no hint of my identity.

[Additude]

My reaction would probably be to purchase the book, hop in bed, start reading and re-live the experiences through someone elses eyes...then shoot my load all over my chest...

[MrsPandMe]

Hehe... Well, no work of fiction is truly fictitious... Everyone write to what they know and what they've experienced, so there's always an element of non-fiction in every work..

Anyway, to the question. I think it would be a huge turn on to read about what the other person thought of a sexual encounter with me... I think... Unless it sucked.

If we were kept anonymous, who would know but us and them anyway? Go for it!

P

[fun4Ds]

Originally Posted by If_You_Please

Would you find it violating at all if, in a published work of non-fiction, a former partner described playtimes/sex acts that you partook in while keeping your identity anonomous? (Obviously, without your knowledge.)

Yes, I would feel violated. Even though the world might not have a clue. I would... Along the lines of in my profession, something shitty is done and then because its covered up no one should care. Again, I do, I care.

And that published work, might lead to a small circle of personal character's knowing as well. How you see something as an inspiration, might not be so inspiring to the characters in question. I would feel like your exposing something personal to the world, when this should have been discussed personaly before hand. I would have questions with the author, knowing it was in fact about us/me.

If you found out about it, after the fact, what would your reaction be?

Uhhh, we need to talk !

[swvacouplelookn]

I think as long as nobody has a clue as to our identities, there's no reason my wife and I would feel violated in any way. fun4Ds' mention of a small circle who WOULD know, however does imply that simply not disclosing names does NOT guarantee total anonymity. Just like I said, if nobody could possibly have a clue, then it's no big deal. Otherwise just because names were not mentioned wouldn't necessarily mean nobody could figure it out. Other details could very well provide clues to those who might know!

[JustAskJulie]

as long as I'm kept anonymous I don't really care. It may also depend on what you mean by published. Do you mean a story shared on a site like this? Or are book published in mass media? I think the difference may make a difference to some. Not for me really, if it's anonymous then neither I nor anyone else can really prove it is or isn't me they are talking about. I might recognize some things and would be irritated if I wasn't portrayed in a positive light, but it's just a story.

[sweet_tna]

When you say "published," do you mean in a novel or magazine article? 'Cause if you're referring to an online forum such as this, we're pretty much all busted.

Either way, as long as my identity was kept anonymous, I'd think it was pretty cool (especially if the account was flattering). The author obviously would've thought our encounter memorable enough to include it in their work.

=)

[Spoomonkey]

I wrote a couple of short stories here a long, long time ago. They were real experiences, but I was careful to change things enough that I was convinced that the people we talked about wouldn't even recognize the story. Keep in mind though, that they wouldn't know who actually wrote it unless they remembered having sex with a purple monkey and his brunette wife...

We eventually got an email from someone who said they loved the story that we had posted in such and such a magazine. That sort of pissed me off, knowing that people troll around sites like these swiping stories and publishing them (which we would have never know had they not put our email with the story). Needless to say we didn't get a cent for it - and erotic writing pays very well.

In fact, as a sidebar, did you know that quite a few best selling writers supplement their income writing porn because it pays so much more per word than non-porn writing?

Anyway - no... It wouldn't bother us if they made sure to keep us anonymous. If they didn't - see Fun4Ds response...

Spoomonkey

[realcplub2]

3 factors..

First Exactly How anonymous was the writing?

Second, What is this persons explaination for not telling you?

Third.. Umm.. its non fiction so, does it cast you in a favorable light? Are you protrayed as a great lover/great in bed? Or the Reverse?

Depending on the answers.. Either invite them to dinner, or call a good lawyer who is expereinced in LIABLE cases

[slevin]

Originally Posted by Spoomonkey

In fact, as a sidebar, did you know that quite a few best selling writers supplement their income writing porn because it pays so much more per word than non-porn writing?

That doesn't surprise me at all; very few writers actually make enough writing to support themselves. The majority need to have another source of income.

Would we be angry? It depends. If you can't tell it's us then it's no problem, but if you're making a bunch of money from selling stories about us, well I'd be annoyed if we didn't get at least some token for having our stories anonymized.

[Chicup]

A breach of trust? No, but I'd find it to be rather tacky.

I PERSONALLY would view it as a breech of trust if I did it because to me what I do to someone sexually is not to be shared unless they want it shared. I don't view this as a moral issue as much as a personality quirk.

Originally Posted by Spoomonkey

In fact, as a sidebar, did you know that quite a few best selling writers supplement their income writing porn because it pays so much more per word than non-porn writing?

I recently started writing a novel, perhaps I should add more vagina