First meeting for MFM...

[intuition897]

Believe this or not, in almost 5 years of swinging, we've only been with other couples. We have never had a 3some with either a guy or a girl. But we've been wanting to for a while now, and guess what? We've got a big date tonight! I got thinking about it, and the reason that we've never had any single guy horror stories is because we've never gotten any further than email with them! I guess maybe we're a little over-cautious, but we were always happy meeting with couples so the supposed extra risk of meeting singles didn't appeal to us much. I'm sure there are some on the board (for example, the Naughties) who would disagree that singles are riskier than couples, but the lifestyle is different for different couples.

So. Here I am, shaving my legs and curling my hair, picking out something to wear, packing our bag (yet another 3-hour drive), and more nervous now than I was before meeting couples. Why you ask? Good question. Maybe it has something to do with me feeling like I'm in the spotlight up on a stage or something. Mr. intuition is straight as an arrow, and has no interest in changing his mind. So this show's all about me. I just don't know how to be comfortable being the centre of attention!

I guess I just wanted to vent, guys. I'm feeling a bit like a cat clinging to the ceiling by the claws right now (you know, like Sylvester the cat in the episode where he and Porky went to the haunted hotel?). *sigh* Somebody talk me down! Nothing may happen at all tonight; it's supposed to be just meet & greet. But we are staying over, so you never know how things will go. Anybody have any advice? Is there anything we should know or think ahead about that would be different from swinging with couples? We have experience with swinging...just not with singles.

Thanks everybody!

[jennandjamesinm]

Intitution -

I have no experience from which to draw from. Just wanted to say good luck and relax and have a great time!!!

Jenn

[Sweet_Candy]

Sounds like something you've been looking forward to...so enjoy what may happen...there's always tomorrow. Have a great time, a MFM is about you the female being the center of attention...enjoy it.

Sweet

[curiousagain]

Just be yourself. Simple if not easy. Do the same things you would meeting a couple. Although it is all about you, if the single guy isn't comfortable with Mr. Intuition or vice versa it ain't gonna fly. If he appears to be doing this begrudingly, or he and the guy have a personality conflict or one of them has a trust issue with the other, then it's a no go. So both of you just be yourselves as you would when meeting a couple and see how it goes.

[intuition897]

Thanks everyone. Curiousagain, I especially appreciate your input, seeing as how you're a single yourself. I don't think there will be any issue between Mr. intuition and our new friend as he seems to be serious, is "single and loving it" and has no intentions of changing his marital status anytime soon, and has asked for a face pic of the two of us together before meeting us. That impressed us. Nah, I'm just nervous. It's a new thing, and anything new rattles our nerves a bit. Ok, just my nerves. Mr. read my post here and has tried to reassure me. He's cool as a cucumber about it all. We'll be leaving shortly, but I'll check back in once more before we leave. Thanks again everybody!

[curiousagain]

Good luck, have fun.
Remember, it is about you!! I hear some women talk about a MFM strained them because they felt like they were responsible for pleaseing two men.
nay nay nay nay, a MFM is about the one in the middle. Just enjoy it and show your husband how much you appreciate it.

[SBcpl]

Originally Posted by curiousagain

Just be yourself.

Excellent advice! Dito That's what one of A's other suitors told her shortly before our first MFM . She worked hard at just being natural—just doing whatever felt right at that instant, without worrying about the why's and wherefore's. And, despite her initial nervousness, we had a fan-fucking-tastic time!

Since then we've had a total of four great MFM's with three different guys. And, as A has learned more and more to simply relax and enjoy it, she's been climbing to ever higher levels of excitement and pleasure in our encounters.

So just relax, do whatever feels comfortable, and remember that you're the Queen—enjoy it to the max!

~ B ~

[intuition897]

UPDATE: Ok, tell me what you all think of this.

We drive 1 3/4 hours to meet at a hotel lounge at 9:00 pm. Everyone seemed to be on schedule. He calls the cell phone to let us know he would be about 1/2 hour late ("9:30 at the absolute latest"). We said fine, that gives us a little extra time to get checked in and settled. So at 9:15 we go to the lounge to wait. 9:40 we get another call saying he's in Scarborough in traffic (approximately 10-20 minutes away). Hmm. Well, ok, that's fine. 10:40 pm, we've asked for our bill and head back up to our room as the lounge closes at 11:00. I said to Mr., what do you suppose the odds are he'll show up at 5 minutes to 11:00?! Lo and behold, 10 minutes to 11:00 pm, another call saying he's 2 minutes away. Mr. informed him that we've turned in for the night and sorry but it's just not going to work out. The guy didn't start with an apology or anything, just informed us that he was nearly there and I guess expected us to be waiting outside the closed lounge (that we were all supposed to meet at nearly 2 hours ago) to immediately invite him up to our room. So we never did actually meet face to face. Apparently he was upset that he drove the 1 hour to get to our meeting place with nothing to show for it. Mr. said, yeah we were sorry that we all had to travel so far for absolutely nothing. We didn't mention that it cost us nearly $200 to boot.

But seeing as how it's our anniversary today (11 years! Yay!), we didn't let it spoil a good night at a hotel, eating take-out and having lots of good hot raunchy sex...even if we didn't have a third. We just wanted to see whether everyone thought that was unreasonable of us to send the guy packing?

Thanks for all the feedback!

[WesternSwing]

I think more than reasonable, intuition. Two hours late? There is no excuse for that. None. You were right to send him packing for being so inconsiderate. It's situations like this that make me wonder if they are married and just had a hard time getting out of the house. Even if he is single, he obviously has no respect for your time. What else will he not respect? Good move on your part.

Mr. WS

[DaveNSheila]

Happy Anniversary to the both of you! Nah it wasn't unreasonable to send him packing. You all planned a time to meet and it wasn't fulfilled. Now mind you I understand that stuff happens and there are things that are just out of our hands, he was curteous at least and did call you to update you but after awhile you get to the point that with all of this happening it just isn't worth it and maybe should reschedule for another time. Glad that you and Mr. Intuition had a very enjoyable evening together. D and S

[curiousagain]

Congratulations on your anniversary

I think you gave the guy more chances than most would have. I believe you did the right thing. Write'm off. It may have been a case of the road totally blocked, who knows. But, stuff often happens for a reason.

At least it wasn't a totally wasted trip for y'all.

[Dynamar]

Dito ::: Soup Nazi voice ::: "No more meets for him!" /Soup Nazi voice

[curious24]

Happy anniversary!

I would be a little ticked too. However, I took a look at your Swing Lifestyle profile and wow! This guy is a moron! All he had to travel was an hour? Heck I would travel from Austin!

[Vespertine]

Originally Posted by curious24

However, I took a look at your Swing Lifestyle profile and wow! This guy is a moron! All he had to travel was an hour?

Dito

There is no doubt about it.... the Intuitions are a beautiful couple. I think I'd be two hours early to a meeting with them if I were that guy.

You did the right thing sending him packing. Don't feel bad about it and don't give him another thought.

Happy Anniversary!

[curiousagain]

Originally Posted by Vespertine

Dito

There is no doubt about it.... the Intuitions are a beautiful couple. I think I'd be two hours early to a meeting with them if I were that guy.

You did the right thing sending him packing. Don't feel bad about it and don't give him another thought.

Happy Anniversary!

As a single guy I have to say thinking about this guy's actions and Intuitions profile and post, the word idiot keeps popping up.

Nobody plans to fail but lots of people fail to plan. <EG>