Single Male - First MFM. Any tips or advice?

[jrt383]

Hi everyone i have been approached by a couple to join them in a mfm! I'm not gay or bi and neither is he but since i've never done this before do you guy's have any tips or suggestions?

Tommy

[TeamSoBe]

It isn't a gay thing at all, it's a BLAST for a straight guy. You don't seem to present any reasons why it would be a bad idea in your situation. Some people here will warn about doing things like this with friends but we pick off single guy friends of ours whenever we want and we've never accidentally wrecked a friendship over it. Usually you end up much better friends. If your friends think that you can handle it and you think that you can handle it then you might as well try it.

Lots of people here will be happy to help with any specific questions or concerns that you might have.

[WesternSwing]

From the male half of a couple, here is what I'd like to see from a single male.

1) Remember that you are the stunt cock. Nothing more. You are not a replacement cock, you are an additional cock. And as quick as they brought you in, they can exclude you too.
2) Always let the husband lead, and take your cues from him. Remember, it is his wife and love of his life. Treat her with respect, treat him with respect, and treat their relationship with respect.
3) If you are friends with them, remember that there is no intimacy outside the bedroom. Outside the bedroom you are still JUST FRIENDS.
4) Be clear up front with them about what is okay and what is off limits. Respect their boundries. This will make it a better experience for everyone.

As the single male you have the ability to make this an incredible experience for them, or a real wash-out. Do it right and there is a good chance you'll be invited back many more times.

Mr. WS

[TeamSoBe]

I second #2 and #4. In our case #1 and #3 are different. We enjoy becoming more intimate with friends who we are close with and who we respect. Male, female, couples, whatever. We don't see them as body parts and we wouldn't do it with people who we didn't really like. Once I have shared my wife with a guy I kind of expect them to be warmer with each other afterward and they usually are. It's one of the benefits, more guys who I like and respect looking out for my wonderful woman with me. As long as they get that I call the shots and that it's casual we're cool with boyfriend-type intimacy outside of the bedroom. When appropriate.

Just don't go thinking every couple is like us, you could end up pissing some people off and not getting invited to any more threesomes.

[Miss_Piggy]

Dito, TeamSoBe.

I like your outlook.

[jrt383]

Wow i didn't ecpect so many excellent reply's so quickly!! I know i'm just another dick to them that's cool and i have already told the hub that i do nothing without his prior consent i wouldn't dare to think that i'm more important than the hub.........only arrogant fools would think that! I've done lots of MFF's in the past but................ well i know this may sound stupid to all of you but i've never been in a two dick fuck fest before and well to be truthful i'm nervous because i've never done this before i'm not sure what to expect and the wife is sooooooo hot to me it's an honor just to be considered to join them!!

Maybe i'm just trippin for no reason ya think??
So to boil all the bs out i just follow their lead and just go with? Is that the right attitude about this?
T

[TeamSoBe]

Originally Posted by jrt383

So to boil all the bs out i just follow their lead and just go with? Is that the right attitude about this?

Exactly. Just don't take it too seriously and remember that their issues are more complex than yours. You just want to get laid and look good doing it without pissing anybody off, simple. Their concerns are a little more complex so you can make them most comfortable by being gracious about getting that.

The performance anxiety is totally normal. It can be unnerving to be thinking in the back of your head that there is a straight guy sitting there watching you. He's obviously enjoying something about it or they wouldn't ask you so just remember that he's cheering you on and have fun.

I would ask each of them directly what the deal is, like what their fantasy is that they are into living out or what it is that makes them want to include you like that. It makes me feel less anxious if I know what my role is supposed to be and the communication feels reassuring. Some people like to be spontaneous. Your call.

[WesternSwing]

Originally Posted by TeamSoBe

I would ask each of them directly what the deal is, like what their fantasy is that they are into living out or what it is that makes them want to include you like that. It makes me feel less anxious if I know what my role is supposed to be and the communication feels reassuring. Some people like to be spontaneous.

Very good point. That way there is no question as to your role.

Originally Posted by TeamSoBe

Just don't take it too seriously and remember that their issues are more complex than yours.

Another good point. You get to go home and think nothing more of it. They have to live together and deal with any issues that may come up (such as the green eyed monster).

Come to think of it, being the single male can be a big responsibility. But done right, you'll be a king amongst them.

Mr. WS

[L]

very lucky... is a man who is invited into another couple's bed!


do your best to avoid performance anxiety! you (and your friends!) don't want you limp.

be sure to avoid premature ejaculation... and be prepared to fuck for hours.

several times!

never get off before the lady! provide her with as many orgasms as she wants!

be polite. be caring. be careful. make them happy and you might be invited to return.

have a wonderful time (lucky guy!).




l

[SteveInAZ]

JRT - I'm always interested in how the hubby expects / responds to the other dick. I love a hard dick and a warm pussy, but not everyone has the same perspective - let us all know how it comes out Amigo...

[Spoomonkey]

Originally Posted by WesternSwing

From the male half of a couple, here is what I'd like to see from a single male.

You know, WS - this should be posted to the thread about "One on Ones". If a single guy followed this little list of yours, not only would he get some action, he likely be added to our little circle of friends as a "regular".

It just stuns me with all this information on this message board there are so many single guys who just completely don't get it.

Kudos to you, JRT, for having the wisdom to ask ahead of time! I personally think they've made a wise choice in their selection, just from what I've read...

I have very little to add, except for this. Yes, you really are "trippin" over nothing. But - it is refreshing to see someone "trip" over these kind of details. In the end though, just have sex. Enjoy it, enjoy her, enjoy yourself. Don't freak out (or, in the more hip vernacular - "trip") if your nerves get you the first time. Just take your time, focus on her, let nature take it's course.

You seem to be in touch with the respect part of things!

So good luck.

Spoomonkey

[curiousagain]

"Maybe i'm just trippin for no reason ya think??
So to boil all the bs out i just follow their lead and just go with? Is that the right attitude about this?
T "
Now you're getting it. Take a long shower, dress nice, smell nice, carry a bottle of GOOD wine with you, no chateau muscatale here. Be friendly, be nice, be respectful, aim to please. Respect their boundries and hold fast to yours. Don't be a doormat, but realize where you are, physically and emotionally. You are a guest to their bed and their relationship. Act that way and expect to be treated that way.

Have a good time. Do your best to make sure everyone else does too.

Play safe and play careful, it's a big world out there.
Curiousagain

[LikeMinds321]

Mr LM and I haven't had experience in MFM but this thread has been wonderful to read!

I feel ready to pursue a single male after reading this thread! facelick

When Mr LM gets home I hope he feels the same way.

LM

[stoutgatte]

This thread came around as if I put it on order...

I have been invited into a MMF with a couple we have played with, and was wondering how to approach it. Thanks for everybody's perspective...

The wife is gonna do video

[jrt383]

Hi everyone sorry i've been neglecting my thread but i didn't have anything new to add. Well the day is here we meet tommorrow night.......I am excited and surprisingly nervous as well!!!! The other couple and i have been chatting and exchanging pics and now we are at the meeting time, now i do not expect anything to happen but i feel pretty certain it will from comments they have made!!!!

Do any of you have an last minute advice???? Should i pack the viagra?? I mean she is such a beautiful woman i find myself looking at her pics often!! I really really want them to enjoy my company but this is new territory for me and well it's kinda scary. I have the inevitable performance anxiety etc. See the thing is i just really want them to have a good time i'm not really worried about my fun i just want them to enjoy the experience..........Damn i'm just ramblin on and on .............it shows i'm nervous lol

I will let you guy's know how it goes saturday.....wish me luck!!!

JRT