CABob, I think specialness must come from within. Think, therefore you are. I don't think it boils down to appearance, attitude, style, grace or sense of humor. What it does boil down to is confidence. Confidence and pride in yourself.
My husband and I are as different as daylight and dark. We aren't anything special (by your defentions) but we are special to ourselves, each other, our families and most of the people we have grown to know. Therefore we are *special*.