Vanilla or Us

[Cpl2share]

We refer to people who are straight laced as Vanilla. Why don't we refer to ourselves as Nepolitan (SP?) This would indicated that we are not vanilla. It can also be used as a bit of code: "Do you prefer vanilla or nepolitan?" Nilla couple will very likely have a mixed answer (I am allergic to chocolate so I would always eat vanilla while the wife prefers chocolate) where swing couple could always answer neopolitan definately! I did consider rainbow sherbet, but the "rainbow" is already in use by the bi/gay community.

I came up with this idea when trying to figure out a way to pin down a couple that seems to be making passes at us, but since we are both very conservative couples, with strong local ties, it has been very slow going.

[M and H]

I like it!!

M&H

[flkeyscouple]

Ya, but.... The problem I have is that I REALLY LIKE vanilla ice cream and I don't like Neapolitan! So, if I was part of that other couple and you asked me which I prefer, I'd have to say "are you talking about ice cream or swinging" and there goes the secrecy of the question!!

Sarah

[sexyshelby]

Sounds great...the only problem is of course spreading the word. Can't just broadcast it on the nightly news, so getting the word out might be troublesome.

~SS

[M and H]

I think presenting the idea on Swingers Board is a good start .... all new uses for words have to start somewhere ... how do you think the swingers' definition of "vanilla" came to be common knowledge?

And while it's becoming common knowledge among swingers, throwing a few other catch-words into the conversation like "lifestyle", "play", "open-minded", "dance club" (our euphemism for a swingers club) are also good hints for those that ARE.

M

[Cpl2share]

I too prefer vanilla (New York, not that white stuff) over neopolitan, but if someone just asked out of the blue, I could say neopolitan because it does have vanilla in it. Like all of us. I figured this is a good question because anyone that you are obviously trying to develope any type of relationship with would not be surprised bya question of ice cream preference, but for us, to hear this out of context to the conversation would be a tip.

[SCcpl40]

We like all the basic flavors, but it's fun to try something different.

[MrsVan]

Well if someone asked me whether I liked Vanilla or Neopolitan I would say neither as the only flavor I like is Chocolate... So why not say, do you like Vanilla or Chocolate.

I think that would work better

MrsVan

[Cpl2share]

Mrs. Van:

But that be stretching the analogy into a whole new dimension of inter-racial (assuming you are white). The neopolitan indicated not vanilla, and my favorite: "Eating that which is pink."

[ViSexual]

Now I just thought of another good answer!

"We both like vanilla, but we like some topping on it every now and then."

[Chip_n_Muffy]

The problem I see is if someone asked me that question and I answered Neopolitan in hopes that I was answering the code correctly, I might soon have a dish of the damn stuff in front of me and I would have to eat it!

Chip

[telly2]

The problem is "Vanilla" isn't as comonly known as we would like to think, only lifestylers refer to it really. I have never heard it out side of lifestyle groups, Thus like Chip said, we may get stuck eating a lot of icecream.

Why do we want to code anything, i thought our goal is to gain acceptance as a group not run further underground. With all the lingo and labels, we sound like a cult. WE try to hide from family friends, etc. We go to private clubs and hide what we do. this is starting to sound like the DaVinci Code. Do we need masks and clokes.

I would so prefer for the truth to get out there, swinging is nothing new and what we do behind closed door is really no big deal. If we were single, this behaviour is "normal" in todays society. Chastity is not what it was 40 yrs ago, but for some reason we live in a closet about it now.

I can understand that some proffessions this would not be looked on favourable, but with it a hiden thing it is not helping on that front either. 40 yrs ago gays were not looked at as abnormal and needing medical help, but with all the outward publicity they have gain not only acceptance but are changing laws all over the world, We should look at that and not hiding the reality. We are and have always been, and we don't hurt anyone and probably respect and treat others better than most vanillas. Look at our marriage success rates and the fact that we can also treat our playmates with that same respect.

We should be proud of what we do not shamed by it. We are a fun loving respectful and strong group of people. And we should respect that in our selves.

Chantal
Sorry about the length of this post

[prettylady]

I would love to stand side by side with you. I agree with every point you make. Sad reality is that we need to remain hidden. Oh what my ex would do if he found out. I don't think I could loose my kids over this but he would certainly try. If we outed ourselves as swingers then couples we meet, whether swinger or not, people will humm and ha about them. This is the first time I have ever keeped a secret in my life. I have no skeletons in my closet. I will keep other peoples secrets, but have none of my own....until now and it sucks. Like Mr. Trueloves saying goes. "most fun I can never tell anyone about" or something like that.
So for now I am going to keep on openly loving my Dog and let people think what they want about us getting a room. Chances are that is where we are headed anyway.

I like vanilla ice cream with a bazillion different toppings all over me...it...the ice cream I mean

Your friend,
Prettylady

[EvilMJ]

What if you are a vanilla couple who prefers neopolitain ice cream.... man that would be a shocker when they got something other than ice cream.

[mrs good times]

Originally Posted by telly2

The problem is "Vanilla" isn't as comonly known as we would like to think, only lifestylers refer to it really. I have never heard it out side of lifestyle groups, Thus like Chip said, we may get stuck eating a lot of icecream.

I look at the weatherman on our local news in a completely different way in the mornings because he actually used the term "vanilla" to describe an event in town.