Swinging vs. Lifestyle

Deptydog · 03-16-2006, 10:27 PM

This question occured to me while replying to another post.

Is there any distinction in your minds between swinging and being in the "Lifestyle"?

For myself, I'd have to say yes. I could take up several pages to explain my position, but I want to hear what you all have to say.

NakedInSeattle · 03-16-2006, 11:09 PM

We are swinging in the lifestyle. And swinging is a lifestyle.

**good times** · 03-16-2006, 11:18 PM

My opinion is that either one is so many different things to so many different people that I believe it is impossible to define them. So to answer your question, no I don't think their is any definable difference.

VegasLee · 03-16-2006, 11:20 PM

Surrender

sereneiders · 03-17-2006, 01:56 AM

I wouldn't say swinging changed my every day life in such a way as to call it a "lifestyle" (as opposed to, let say, vegetarian people who indeed have a life style).

In the other hand, I feel particulary identified with the way other swingers sees their own lifes, and I found we share a lot of values and ways to think about other matters in the world around us, so from this identification point of view, I'd say the term "lifestyler" fits.

sexyshelby · 03-17-2006, 03:40 AM

Interesting question. I'd say it depends on how you define each term. But they seem the same to me, in the general definition of each word.

I'd be interested to know why you think there is a difference.

~SS

JTcamp05 · 03-17-2006, 05:01 AM

It's an interesting question....suppose how far you decide to take it..... I would say for is its not a lifestyle cause it doesnt make up everyday life...but for the sake of conversation I would say were in the lifestyle....guess it just makes it easier to clear through the clutter......

Dave_kat · 03-17-2006, 06:15 AM

In our opinion, a lifestyle is how you choose to live your life. Things that you actively do that is comfortable for you both.

Swinging is an example of a lifestyle, although it could also be considered a hobby or something that you do.

The difference would be truly in how you look at things. Do you consider yourselves Swingers when you do this once, maybe twice, or lifestylers when you have an open house every weekend?

It's truly a matter of viewpoint.

Deptydog · 03-17-2006, 07:44 PM

Well, since I don't want to make this a 30 page post, I'll try to keep my answer short and sweet.

Swinging - I'd define that as having sex with someone other than your partner or spouse, with their consent. However, that isn't the complete defination. There's soft swinging, full swap, and so on. So I guess I'd say that it is being involved in a sexual situation with someone other than your partner, but with their consent.

Lifestyle - This one is a much broader term IMHO. The best way I can define it is to use my wife and I as an example. We started swinging 13 years ago. We had occasional couples or singles, but it wasn't really something we "were". Now, we are in a Lifestyle. We look for situations, we plan our swinging events, and it has become a much larger part of our life. One of the things that we discussed was that we enjoyed going to parties because we were free to be ourselves without having to worry about offending someone else who might be more "prudish" than ourselves. We were able to have an adult conversation and not have to keep ourselves in check. And if we met someone and there was good chemistry, well great. If not, well great. We are just enjoying ourselves.

Did I muddy the water up at all?

Spoomonkey · 03-17-2006, 08:07 PM

VegasLee has really poured a lot of information about the evolution of the terms and how, today, it is so "user defined" as to make the terms almost useless in describing what people are doing...

We have sex with others - but I think there is more involved in the term "lifestyle" - and frankly outside of the "community" the term "swinger" carries so much baggage (picture guys in silk shirts and greased hair with medallions and the strong smell of Aqua Velve over the stronger smell of body odor) that it is something you almost want to hide form when discussing it.

We tell people (if we tell anyone) that we are "responsibly non-monogamous" - and then watch them twitch...

Spoomonkey

confunktion · 03-17-2006, 10:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spoomonkey

We tell people (if we tell anyone) that we are "responsibly non-monogamous" - and then watch them twitch...

Beautiful...I love this line, and I just may steal it. Agreed with my Monkey Brother 100%

Mr. Funk
What's the penalty for stealing from a monkey?

lovedoctor · 03-18-2006, 12:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by confunktion

Beautiful...I love this line, and I just may steal it. Agreed with my Monkey Brother 100%

Mr. Funk
What's the penalty for stealing from a monkey?

I'm gonna borrow this one too

Spoo, you can put it on my tab...

sereneiders · 03-18-2006, 02:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spoomonkey

"responsibly non-monogamous"

Nice one. I gess if you get a chuckle you can give them back a wide open smile and add: "it's better to be a rosponsible non-monogamous than a irresponsible monogamous, hu?"

Spoomonkey · 03-18-2006, 08:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by confunktion

What's the penalty for stealing from a monkey?

Just to clarify - this isn't unique to me. I don't remember where I read it. You're all just receiving stolen goods

Spoomonkey

Deptydog · 03-19-2006, 09:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spoomonkey

You're all just receiving stolen goods

Spoomonkey

Don't make me get out the handcuffs.

On second thought...

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03-16-2006, 10:27 PM	#1 (permalink)
Deptydog Here to Stay Join Date: Oct 2005 Posts: 81 Location: Lakeland, Florida Status: Married Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:IreneNBob	Swinging vs. Lifestyle This question occured to me while replying to another post. Is there any distinction in your minds between swinging and being in the "Lifestyle"? For myself, I'd have to say yes. I could take up several pages to explain my position, but I want to hear what you all have to say.

03-16-2006, 11:09 PM	#2 (permalink)
NakedInSeattle Loving life (style) Join Date: Sep 2004 Posts: 449 Location: Seattle, WA Status: Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:NakedInSeattle	Re: Swinging vs. Lifestyle We are swinging in the lifestyle. And swinging is a lifestyle.

03-16-2006, 11:18 PM	#3 (permalink)
good times Mod Squad Member Join Date: Jul 2002 Posts: 6,919 Location: Reno, Nevada Status: Married to Mrs Good Times Swing Lifestyle Name:randp	Re: Swinging vs. Lifestyle My opinion is that either one is so many different things to so many different people that I believe it is impossible to define them. So to answer your question, no I don't think their is any definable difference.
	__________________ R (He is R, she is P)

03-16-2006, 11:20 PM	#4 (permalink)
VegasLee Laura's Male Join Date: Dec 2003 Posts: 1,951 Location: Las Vegas, Nevada Status: Laura's Male	Re: Swinging vs. Lifestyle Surrender
	__________________ You all laugh at me because I am different. I laugh at all of you because you are all the same.

03-17-2006, 01:56 AM	#5 (permalink)
sereneiders Some sort of user Join Date: Oct 2005 Posts: 1,131 Location: Argentina Status: Couple	Re: Swinging vs. Lifestyle I wouldn't say swinging changed my every day life in such a way as to call it a "lifestyle" (as opposed to, let say, vegetarian people who indeed have a life style). In the other hand, I feel particulary identified with the way other swingers sees their own lifes, and I found we share a lot of values and ways to think about other matters in the world around us, so from this identification point of view, I'd say the term "lifestyler" fits.

03-17-2006, 03:40 AM	#6 (permalink)
sexyshelby It's not easy being easy. Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 2,012 Location: In Bed Status: Person	Re: Swinging vs. Lifestyle Interesting question. I'd say it depends on how you define each term. But they seem the same to me, in the general definition of each word. I'd be interested to know why you think there is a difference. ~SS
	__________________ What's love got to do with it?

03-17-2006, 05:01 AM	#7 (permalink)
JTcamp05 Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 285 Location: Ohio Status: Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:JtCamp05	Re: Swinging vs. Lifestyle It's an interesting question....suppose how far you decide to take it..... I would say for is its not a lifestyle cause it doesnt make up everyday life...but for the sake of conversation I would say were in the lifestyle....guess it just makes it easier to clear through the clutter......

03-17-2006, 06:15 AM	#8 (permalink)
Dave_kat Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 291 Location: Savannah, Ga Status: couple Swing Lifestyle Name:Dave_kat	Re: Swinging vs. Lifestyle In our opinion, a lifestyle is how you choose to live your life. Things that you actively do that is comfortable for you both. Swinging is an example of a lifestyle, although it could also be considered a hobby or something that you do. The difference would be truly in how you look at things. Do you consider yourselves Swingers when you do this once, maybe twice, or lifestylers when you have an open house every weekend? It's truly a matter of viewpoint.
	__________________ Reality is based on perception, therefore everyone has their own reality.

03-17-2006, 07:44 PM	#9 (permalink)
Deptydog Here to Stay Join Date: Oct 2005 Posts: 81 Location: Lakeland, Florida Status: Married Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:IreneNBob	Re: Swinging vs. Lifestyle Well, since I don't want to make this a 30 page post, I'll try to keep my answer short and sweet. Swinging - I'd define that as having sex with someone other than your partner or spouse, with their consent. However, that isn't the complete defination. There's soft swinging, full swap, and so on. So I guess I'd say that it is being involved in a sexual situation with someone other than your partner, but with their consent. Lifestyle - This one is a much broader term IMHO. The best way I can define it is to use my wife and I as an example. We started swinging 13 years ago. We had occasional couples or singles, but it wasn't really something we "were". Now, we are in a Lifestyle. We look for situations, we plan our swinging events, and it has become a much larger part of our life. One of the things that we discussed was that we enjoyed going to parties because we were free to be ourselves without having to worry about offending someone else who might be more "prudish" than ourselves. We were able to have an adult conversation and not have to keep ourselves in check. And if we met someone and there was good chemistry, well great. If not, well great. We are just enjoying ourselves. Did I muddy the water up at all?

03-17-2006, 08:07 PM	#10 (permalink)
Spoomonkey Chimpin' Ain't Easy Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 6,739 Location: Ohio Status: Married Monkeys - will you be our vine? Swing Lifestyle Name:Spoomonkey	Re: Swinging vs. Lifestyle VegasLee has really poured a lot of information about the evolution of the terms and how, today, it is so "user defined" as to make the terms almost useless in describing what people are doing... We have sex with others - but I think there is more involved in the term "lifestyle" - and frankly outside of the "community" the term "swinger" carries so much baggage (picture guys in silk shirts and greased hair with medallions and the strong smell of Aqua Velve over the stronger smell of body odor) that it is something you almost want to hide form when discussing it. We tell people (if we tell anyone) that we are "responsibly non-monogamous" - and then watch them twitch... Spoomonkey
	__________________ "Eros will have naked bodies; Friendship naked personalities." - C. S. Lewis

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