Swinging with Co-Workers?

Tira · 11-03-2007, 04:00 PM

We are completely new to the lifestyle and already face a (rather difficult) situation.
While browsing AFF we came across one of my co-workers and his wife's ad there

Said co-worker works in the same office as me (literally right next to me), and we have a very good relationship.
The temptation is there to approach them, but my husband thinks that it is a bad idea to get involved with co-workers.

Any input?

LikeMinds321 · 11-03-2007, 04:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tira

We are completely new to the lifestyle and already face a (rather difficult) situation.
While browsing AFF we came across one of my co-workers and his wife's ad there

Said co-worker works in the same office as me (literally right next to me), and we have a very good relationship.
The temptation is there to approach them, but my husband thinks that it is a bad idea to get involved with co-workers.

Any input?

I agree with your husband. Bad idea to swing with your co-worker WHO SITS NEXT TO YOU EACH DAY.

Keep your relationship nice, keep work nice, KEEP YOUR JOB, by not swinging with them.

I'd go so far as to block them from seeing your profile to keep them from discovering you. Hopefully they already haven't.

LM

purpletiger · 11-03-2007, 04:25 PM

We ran into one of my co-workers at a party - I had an idea they may be there but she didn't have a clue. Ended up being one of the best times we've had.

I didn't sit close and only wish I knew her before that weekend

lovinher · 11-03-2007, 04:58 PM

Way too risky! Even if it goes well the first few times or there are never any issues between the four of you, given time, something will happen. Something as innocent as a slip of the tongue or an overheard comment could cause you a whole bunch of trouble. At some point co-workers will figure out something is going on, especially in an office. I'm sure there are plenty of success stories out there but there are plenty of lottery winners also.
Your husband is right.

intuition897 · 11-03-2007, 07:04 PM

Outing yourselves to this coworker may be tempting - hell, I'm even tempted to say go for it! - but common sense tells us that where there is a relationship that is relatively permanent or non-negotiable (family, neighbours, co-workers, kids' friends' parents, etc) that would potentially be soured by their finding out or being propositioned by you, it's better to just leave that shit alone. Your only option if they freak out or turn to stalking you is to quit your job. Are you prepared to do that? If it's your neighbours, are you prepared to move? If it's your kids' friends' parents, are you prepared to explain to your kid why Little Johnny can't come over to play anymore?

ncmd_couple · 11-03-2007, 07:08 PM

Any relationship with a co-worker is fraught with danger.

I have worked with bosses that were banging their secretaries, everyone knew it.

I (with one very special exception because I have known her for many years before she worked for the same company, and there is no drama there) keep my personal life and my work life very separate. To do otherwise would be a disaster waiting to happen.

Block them so that they can’t see you and enjoy your personal life.

Tira · 11-04-2007, 06:59 AM

Thank you all for your help, after discussing the situation in detail, we have decided as well that the cons outweigh the pros by quite a bit, and it's just not worth the drama that might ensue.

**BiloxiCouple** · 11-04-2007, 12:38 PM

One more time...

No co-workers.

No friends.

No family, for those that have a hot in-law or a close cousin here in Mississippi..

No problems.

purpletiger · 11-04-2007, 06:14 PM

I would like to say I would never approach them at work. But, if you happen to run into them at a party or meet and greet, definitely stop by and say Hi! You never know what might happen

ShellyM · 11-04-2007, 06:17 PM

BAD BAD BAD IDEA.
Do not bring co-workers into your swinging unless
1. You don't care when the word gets leaked out
or
2. It doesnt matter when you are fired.

Remember, vanillas will not think that your sexual openness is funny. Even if they have a lover, they will NOT appreciate it at all.

sweet_tna · 11-04-2007, 08:15 PM

One more vote in the Bad Idea ballot box . . .

undercovercpl · 11-05-2007, 08:59 AM

I can tell you from experience....... DON'T DO IT!!! It will get really weird, it might take a few months but things at work will get really weird and uncomfortable.

**BiloxiCouple** · 11-05-2007, 03:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ShellyM

Remember, vanillas will not think that your sexual openness is funny. Even if they have a lover, they will NOT appreciate it at all.

I must truly live in a different world. In my job I can get it hard. I can make a pass or play the field. I can show you how to come. Hell, I'll even make a proposition for you. You can get a cheap lay. You want a 3 way? Yep, right at work. Want to hop on it? Yes please!!! And I've got the biggest stick ever pushed in front of you. Sometimes it's good to be me

That is just the tip of it.

DBLPAR · 11-05-2007, 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LikeMinds321

I'd go so far as to block them from seeing your profile to keep them from discovering you. Hopefully they already haven't.

LM

Long time lurker, first time poster. That is too funny. There's a local cpl on Swing Lifestyle that blocked us and I have no idea why. It just occured to me from reading this that maybe they know us. We have been spotted by a neighborhood cpl and that went over fine. Now I gotta go find them and figure out who the hell it is.

WesternSwing · 11-05-2007, 05:43 PM

I feel it also is a bad idea. If something was to go wrong at work between you and the coworker it could turn really ugly. Not just for getting exposed, but in our case it was a feeling of betrayal by the coworker. Here's the lowdown:

My wife took a job with a company owned by a swinger friend's parents. We met through swinging and had become good friends with them outside of sex also, and when Mrs. WS suddenly found herself unemployed they offered her a job.

A year or so later Mrs. WS wanted to leave for another company because of better pay. Our friends took it as a personal affront and much drama ensued for weeks afterward. The friendship has never been repaired.

You're bound to run into each other at a party sometime. I personally would just leave it until then. Then you can have a good laugh about it. But I would still not get involved with them physically.

Mr. WS

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11-03-2007, 04:00 PM	#1 (permalink)
Tira Registered Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 4 Location: Germany Status: Couple	Swinging with Co-Workers? We are completely new to the lifestyle and already face a (rather difficult) situation. While browsing AFF we came across one of my co-workers and his wife's ad there Said co-worker works in the same office as me (literally right next to me), and we have a very good relationship. The temptation is there to approach them, but my husband thinks that it is a bad idea to get involved with co-workers. Any input?

11-03-2007, 04:25 PM	#3 (permalink)
purpletiger Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Jul 2002 Posts: 144 Location: NC Status: couple	Re: Swinging with Co-Workers? We ran into one of my co-workers at a party - I had an idea they may be there but she didn't have a clue. Ended up being one of the best times we've had. I didn't sit close and only wish I knew her before that weekend

11-03-2007, 04:58 PM	#4 (permalink)
lovinher Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 1,008 Location: cleveland area Status: married to lovinhim	Re: Swinging with Co-Workers? Way too risky! Even if it goes well the first few times or there are never any issues between the four of you, given time, something will happen. Something as innocent as a slip of the tongue or an overheard comment could cause you a whole bunch of trouble. At some point co-workers will figure out something is going on, especially in an office. I'm sure there are plenty of success stories out there but there are plenty of lottery winners also. Your husband is right.
	__________________ I know I was born. I know that I'll die. The in between is mine. (PJ)

11-03-2007, 07:04 PM	#5 (permalink)
intuition897 Canadian, eh? Join Date: Sep 2004 Posts: 2,633 Location: Kingston, ON Status: Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:intuition897	Re: Swinging with Co-Workers? Outing yourselves to this coworker may be tempting - hell, I'm even tempted to say go for it! - but common sense tells us that where there is a relationship that is relatively permanent or non-negotiable (family, neighbours, co-workers, kids' friends' parents, etc) that would potentially be soured by their finding out or being propositioned by you, it's better to just leave that shit alone. Your only option if they freak out or turn to stalking you is to quit your job. Are you prepared to do that? If it's your neighbours, are you prepared to move? If it's your kids' friends' parents, are you prepared to explain to your kid why Little Johnny can't come over to play anymore?
	__________________ Fear is a symptom of ignorance. Knowledge is the cure.

11-03-2007, 07:08 PM	#6 (permalink)
ncmd_couple Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 2,252 Location: North Carolina Status: Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:ncmd_couple	Re: Swinging with Co-Workers? Any relationship with a co-worker is fraught with danger. I have worked with bosses that were banging their secretaries, everyone knew it. I (with one very special exception because I have known her for many years before she worked for the same company, and there is no drama there) keep my personal life and my work life very separate. To do otherwise would be a disaster waiting to happen. Block them so that they can’t see you and enjoy your personal life.
	__________________ Try anything once, twice if it is fun, three times if it is real good!

11-04-2007, 06:59 AM	#7 (permalink)
Tira Registered Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 4 Location: Germany Status: Couple	Re: Swinging with Co-Workers? Thank you all for your help, after discussing the situation in detail, we have decided as well that the cons outweigh the pros by quite a bit, and it's just not worth the drama that might ensue.

11-04-2007, 12:38 PM	#8 (permalink)
BiloxiCouple Julie's Helper Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 4,001 Location: Biloxi, Mississippi Status: Couple with benefits and retired Swing Lifestyle Name:graceful	Re: Swinging with Co-Workers? One more time... No co-workers. No friends. No family, for those that have a hot in-law or a close cousin here in Mississippi.. No problems.
	__________________ *Live in the moment before they are gone.*

11-04-2007, 06:14 PM	#9 (permalink)
purpletiger Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Jul 2002 Posts: 144 Location: NC Status: couple	Re: Swinging with Co-Workers? I would like to say I would never approach them at work. But, if you happen to run into them at a party or meet and greet, definitely stop by and say Hi! You never know what might happen

11-04-2007, 06:17 PM	#10 (permalink)
ShellyM Jay's Bumper Buddy Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 2,299 Location: San Marcos, TEXAS Status: On the prowl for man meat Swing Lifestyle Name:lost_j1	Re: Swinging with Co-Workers? BAD BAD BAD IDEA. Do not bring co-workers into your swinging unless 1. You don't care when the word gets leaked out or 2. It doesnt matter when you are fired. Remember, vanillas will not think that your sexual openness is funny. Even if they have a lover, they will NOT appreciate it at all.
	__________________ Merry Christmas and a Ho Ho Ho Shelly

11-04-2007, 08:15 PM	#11 (permalink)
sweet_tna Being good is overrated Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 4,221 Location: Poconos, PA Status: The boss of Mr. Sweet Swing Lifestyle Name:Sweet_tna	Re: Swinging with Co-Workers? One more vote in the Bad Idea ballot box . . .
	__________________ I'd rather go to hell for doing something I enjoyed than heaven wondering what it's like.

11-05-2007, 08:59 AM	#12 (permalink)
undercovercpl Here to Stay Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 39 Location: Alabama Status: Couple	Re: Swinging with Co-Workers? I can tell you from experience....... DON'T DO IT!!! It will get really weird, it might take a few months but things at work will get really weird and uncomfortable.

11-05-2007, 05:43 PM	#15 (permalink)
WesternSwing South of disorder Join Date: Mar 2004 Posts: 2,973 Location: Utah Status: Single Male	Re: Swinging with Co-Workers? I feel it also is a bad idea. If something was to go wrong at work between you and the coworker it could turn really ugly. Not just for getting exposed, but in our case it was a feeling of betrayal by the coworker. Here's the lowdown: My wife took a job with a company owned by a swinger friend's parents. We met through swinging and had become good friends with them outside of sex also, and when Mrs. WS suddenly found herself unemployed they offered her a job. A year or so later Mrs. WS wanted to leave for another company because of better pay. Our friends took it as a personal affront and much drama ensued for weeks afterward. The friendship has never been repaired. You're bound to run into each other at a party sometime. I personally would just leave it until then. Then you can have a good laugh about it. But I would still not get involved with them physically. Mr. WS
	__________________ "Sex is something you do, sexuality is something you are." ~ Anna Freud

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