Ditto with everyone. Dump this couple fast, they are not worth it. We haven't been doing this long, but I gotta tell ya, that's shady ! I try to make a point of getting to know the female of the other couple first at least a little bit. If I am not at ease with the female, than it's a no go, and visa vera, if my husband is sceptical about the other male it's also a no go. There shouldn't be any anamosity at all. You are considering sharing your wife with this man, he should have respect for you as well as her. All parties involved should relate to one another on some level, and your wife should understand this and cut him off. No secrets !