Cuckolding

[peabody]

We actually prefer the type of sex when my wife hooks up with another man but I am there to watch. There is nothing better than watching another man entering your wife.

[Chicup]

Like all polls on the board, the lurkers will render any number meaningless.

[sandraslooking]

We are rather new to this type of play but we are enjoying it so far.. The worst thing we have found are the guys again. To many talk a big game but when it comes to ironing out details they run away like little boys..

One other thing, I dont agree that lurkers will throw poll results off that much. We have lurked for a long time only because of being so new to the lifestyle we did not have a wealth of info to share.

[Bama0468]

Originally Posted by cubnamy1995

In some senses, I can see the appeal. Especially men who have lots of power and responsibility. I could see the appeal of wanting to relinquish control in what is essentially a power exchange arrangement. Here's why we would not do it:

1. Amy could not be intentionally mean to me, even if it was just role-playing
2. Watching is fun up to a point, but then I want to jump in.
3. Telling me I can't do something is a damn-well sure-fire way to make me want to do it.
4. I have too much fun pretending to be her pimp.
5. Some cuckolds talk about cleaning up their wife after they played, meaning that lick what's left over out of her. Two words: Fuck that.

except insert My wifes name

[sereneiders]

Well, besides the dictionary definition, we may stick to the one we fall into after googling the term. If so, we're talking of a lifestyle on it own, one that's somewhere in between the BDSM and the swinging... altough I hardly correlate with swinging.

We've had pretty bad experiences with people that, later on, we figured out they were into the cuckoldry stuff, and this is because of the diference of expectations we had, even when the explicited ones seemed to be similar.

Don't get me wrong, I am not criticizing cuckoldry nor they expectations, just pointing out there is a big gap between theirs and ours. For example, there's some degree of humilliation involved for the cuckold that, at least him, expect to fulfill, and if they portray themselves as "typical swinger couples" wanting to have some fun (as happened to us), you may end up trapped in an scenario where you become the "tool" triggering the humilliation, placed as a Top, perhaps abusive guy when that was far from your intention.

Again, I am not talking of the "hot wife" scenario here, which doesn't necesrily involves any humilliation, nor the way the Oxford dictionary defines the word cuckold. I am talking of a seldom stricttly ruled role playing game between a marriage and third parties, where every "character" behavior have a seldom usual script to follow. If you pick at random 20 sexual stories about cuckoldry you'd notice the pattern, what turns them on, and a list of features every character's script should have (take or give some of them), and the features they expect from their playmates (moreover the male ones, even if part of a couple). As for me, playing with cuckolds and wifes, I found myself pushed or dragged into the script the "lover" should have (being better lover than the cuck and so forth), like the other guy being suddenly reluctanct to play with my wife because he's more into what's going on with his wife and me, and the wife making bold comments to him, attemting to degrade him by making a comparison... as if I were not there, or expecting me to jump into the game they're devising. They know if we were knowing this could evolve this way, we wouldn't be there in the first place, so they chose not to tell beforehand.

And, in some cases, that this cuckoldry game insn't so clear for some couples, who actually believe every swinger couple share this mindset thus this should be "normal" among swingers. It even happened to me after we declined to play with a couple, to tell them "you guys are into cuckoldry"... "into what?"... "google it". And later on they say "yeah, this is what we're looking for".

I guess Juile's take about polyamory comes handly, because it is true, swingers doesn't feel confortable when playing with poly friendly people... but preciselly because no one of them can tell the difference, or recognze it. Once seen, everyone is able to figure out what he/she is up to, and where the other couple limits are set, in order to commit to a shared ground of rules.

As for us (and BTW we're poly-friendly), we'd avoid playing with "cuckoldry" couples preciselly because our experience already told us most of them cannot tell the difference between cuckoldry and swinging, that my wife would be excluded from the "main events" (even if the guy get laid with her, his head is somewhere else), and I dislike the "better lover" role they're expecting to find out.

[rachan]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

I think cuckolding in recent years is one of those terms that some people have taken and turned into something other than what it started as. While initially it was about shaming your partner, in recent years I think that many people use this term to refer to the "hot wife" idea, of a wife going out and playing on her own (with or without her husband's knowledge) then coming home to tell him about it. He doesn't really get any say in who's she's with or what she does and the only enjoyment he really gets is after the fact.

As with everything, it's always interesting to get different people's take on what it means to them and how they feel about it.

I don't own my wife and she's always been free to do what she wishes. When she fucks other men that's her choice and I want her to enjoy sexual freedom.

[velbuzz]

Not something we would like to do on a regular basis, but if the Mrs. were to entertain another while bound and forced to watch might be interesting for a change of pace.

[hoistsail]

As a Bull it is fun to find couple that are into the cuckold style or like S and L which is more like a hot wife. The most important thing is that it is fun for all involved. With some cuckold couples that does change when the wife really gets into a Bull when the husband is not a true submissive and willing to be in the background.

[Zebrawalk]

Cuckolding excites me. Thinking that my lovely wife is being pleasured by another man is a feeling that gets my juices going. I would encourage her go meet people she likes and have fun and come back and tell me the details. Most men that I have been talking to or chatting online admit that they fantasize about their wives being pleasured by someone else, friend, colleague or strangers. Some are scared to even mention it to their wives, some say the wives dont want to actually do even though she gets hot when fantasy role play takes place and some have actually tried it and find it a mind blowing experience.

What is your experience?

[HornyCouple]

we play on a variation of cuckold/hotwife. This is all agreed on between the two of us. We have had another male that joined us for some MFM fun. Sometimes i participated and sometimes not. He didn't seem to do so well when i was watching or participating so i suggested to my wife that she hook up with him alone some time. She was very hesitant at first but eventually did it and surprised me one day. I had no idea that she was with him but she met up with him and then came home to tell me about it. That was always our rule, she can do whatever but she MUST tell me about it after.

For her it was a rush to 'sneak' and meet with him for a quickie knowing that i had no idea. We had some of best sex when she got home and told me. Also, the guy was probably at his best because he knew that she was sneaking and he probably viewed her as a 'naughty' woman. He knew from previous discussions that i approved and would know about it in the end.

so what one calls it does not matter, what matters is that all parties are in agreement and no true cheating/deception. We all define that line differently.

[tittietwister]

There is a distinction between hotwifing and cuckolding. It was the hotwife model that got us into swinging. The distinction as we see it is that cuckolding has an undertone of S&M to it. Hotwifing does not.

Both are riskier than swinging from an emotional standpoint but personally I find hotwifing the most exciting form of play.

[mjsocal]

Per the dictionary, a cuckold is a man whose wife has sex with another man, which means that all the men in the lifestyle are cuckolds. Cuckolding has the connotation of an inferior man being bested by another having sex with the wife.

My own view is that I thrill to watching her with other men. What I enjoy best is one-sided swinging. With each of the previous four women who lived this lifestyle with me, we started by swinging and gradually moved towards MFMs or my just watching. My present relationship is the first that began as a cuckolding model. We decide to cut to the chase finding that she is more secure with my monogamy.

A lot of what I read in cuckold groups on the 'net seem to be complete fantasy taken to ridiculous lengths. Perhaps some of it is reality. We don't get into the heavier aspects of S&M that can creep into web descriptions of cuckolding activities. We are simply a swinging couple whose husband decided to take the night off to enjoy his wife's pleasure.

While I prefer watching, one really exciting memory was seeing her go off to a private area in a public nightclub to have a quickie with a man we met there and her returning to me with that familiar flush of contentment.

[HornyCouple]

Originally Posted by mjsocal

Per the dictionary, a cuckold is a man whose wife has sex with another man, which means that all the men in the lifestyle are cuckolds. Cuckolding has the connotation of an inferior man being bested by another having sex with the wife.

My own view is that I thrill to watching her with other men. What I enjoy best is one-sided swinging. With each of the previous four women who lived this lifestyle with me, we started by swinging and gradually moved towards MFMs or my just watching. My present relationship is the first that began as a cuckolding model. We decide to cut to the chase finding that she is more secure with my monogamy.

A lot of what I read in cuckold groups on the 'net seem to be complete fantasy taken to ridiculous lengths. Perhaps some of it is reality. We don't get into the heavier aspects of S&M that can creep into web descriptions of cuckolding activities. We are simply a swinging couple whose husband decided to take the night off to enjoy his wife's pleasure.

While I prefer watching, one really exciting memory was seeing her go off to a private area in a public nightclub to have a quickie with a man we met there and her returning to me with that familiar flush of contentment.

Like many things in life it is not black and white. Cuckold has different meaning to different people There is certainly a general concensus of what it is though.

I absolutely understand your comment about seeing her go off to have a quickie and returning to you. that is what i really enjoyed the time she met the guy w/o me and had a quickie then came home smelling and flushed also not more than 20 minutes after being with him. She had a grin that i will remember when she walked in.

[HornyCouple]

Originally Posted by mjsocal

Per the dictionary, a cuckold is a man whose wife has sex with another man, which means that all the men in the lifestyle are cuckolds. Cuckolding has the connotation of an inferior man being bested by another having sex with the wife.

My own view is that I thrill to watching her with other men. What I enjoy best is one-sided swinging. With each of the previous four women who lived this lifestyle with me, we started by swinging and gradually moved towards MFMs or my just watching. My present relationship is the first that began as a cuckolding model. We decide to cut to the chase finding that she is more secure with my monogamy.

A lot of what I read in cuckold groups on the 'net seem to be complete fantasy taken to ridiculous lengths. Perhaps some of it is reality. We don't get into the heavier aspects of S&M that can creep into web descriptions of cuckolding activities. We are simply a swinging couple whose husband decided to take the night off to enjoy his wife's pleasure.

While I prefer watching, one really exciting memory was seeing her go off to a private area in a public nightclub to have a quickie with a man we met there and her returning to me with that familiar flush of contentment.

as for dictionary, who cares do what works for you..

Absolutely like comment about her going off for quickie and coming back.. Wife recently met with our ongoing MFM friend w/o me knowing. She came home with a big grin and told me about it. We had discussed the possiblity of doing this so it was 'preapproved' just did not know when or if would happen. To have her give the details was great and provided for some great sex. It had not been more than 30 minutes since she was with im that we were in bed together. For us it was hot, she said that it was such a thrill to do it with other guy knowing that she was going to tell me later.

[JDApopka]

I love seeing my wife be pleasured by other men but I want to be envolved and know that he is just sex